WeTried Translations
Translator: [IncomeElastic]
Discord: https://dsc.gg/wetried
◈ I Became an Undetected Priest Impersonator ◈
Chapter 31
──────
I Became a Teacher (5)
"Just one question. You're the family of an acquaintance, so I won't treat you harshly, and I'd like you to tell me everything you know."
At that, the man gulped for some reason and blurted out his answer.
"..Spare my life and I'll spill anything."
"? Of course I'll spare you, so just tell me whatever you can guess about why you collapsed."
There seemed to be a slight misunderstanding, but hearing him out wasn't difficult.
"So, after you joined the war in the neighboring domain, your body started feeling chilled, and the moment you got back to the city you lost consciousness and collapsed."
"That's right! Exactly right!"
Pretending to sink into thought for a moment, I opened the Gallery and checked the map.
Then I put on a rather sorrowful expression.
"My, what a misfortune has befallen the neighboring domain."
Of course, my true feelings were a little different.
‘No need to worry about it at all, then.’
It was called the neighboring domain, but it was a distance you could only reach by crossing two more domains.
On top of that, it was part of the Saintess's pilgrimage route, so there seemed to be no reason to bother.
"Don't go getting any ideas about going there. Well, the Lord wouldn't send you anyway."
I had no intention of going in the first place.
I gave a half-hearted nod to Priest Margaret's needless worry and turned my attention back to the man.
"And one more thing. Are your children's names Sean and Ivy?"
"Huh? How do you know my kids' names? Wait, is this a hostage thing!"
It felt like I'd stirred up a misunderstanding, so I hurriedly added more.
"Please tell Sean to bring his little sister to the church every weekend morning. I'm teaching the children there. If you tell him, he'll understand well enough."
"Huh? The church? Not the back alleys?"
The mercenary wore a bizarre expression, clearly not understanding at all.
It was the female priest, who'd arrived late, who corrected the mercenary's mistake.
"..The outfit may be a little odd, but he's a priest, at least."
"That guy's a priest? Not some gang member in a flower-print outfit?"
The mercenary reacted as though he'd seen something outrageous.
It couldn't be helped that my fragile heart took a wound.
‘Nobody has an eye for this.’
It was nothing but an elegant outfit, too.
The situation was settled for the time being.
The cursed mercenaries woke up bewildered and each went back to their own homes or wherever they were staying.
But not everyone could go home.
"I'll stay the day."
"No need. You go on back."
"What are you saying, after you fainted? Just rest at the church."
I did wonder whether the old woman who'd fainted once was the right one to stay behind, but Priest Margaret shook her head and refused.
"I'm actually more comfortable at the clinic, and besides, if you're gone, who's going to calm Priest Malja down?"
That wasn't wrong either.
In the end, the only family Priest Malja had to lean on was me.
"Then call for me right away if anything happens."
"Got it, now hurry up and go."
I bowed once to Priest Margaret, who was waving her hand about, and turned my back.
"Priest Malja, were you very frightened?"
"..A little?"
Priest Malja, calmed down by now, looked embarrassed.
Crying like a small child at an age when she'd soon be an adult seemed to have mortified her, by her own measure.
‘Adulthood at sixteen, huh. That's tough.’
It was then that I quietly apologized.
"I think I spoke too harshly earlier. You had no experience and it was your first time, so I'm sorry if I hurt your feelings."
Priest Malja's eyes went round, as if she hadn't expected to hear an apology.
"So as a token of apology, I'll accept the acolyte request you made before."
"Huh?"
"And since I'm teaching you anyway, I'll teach you properly so that nothing ever flusters you again."
"..Huh?"
"Once you've learned it all, you'll be able to keep such a firm grip on your composure that you could reattach your own severed arm by yourself without trouble."
"...?!"
For some reason, Priest Malja's pupils shook.
It seemed to be from joy.
"Um, you said you had unavoidable circumstances, so, d-don't you think it's too much trouble, you really don't need to do it just for my sake.."
Maybe she'd remembered me saying before that I couldn't take an acolyte because of personal reasons.
Priest Malja shook her head in a hurry and declined.
As if she were worried about being a burden.
But that was no longer any concern of mine.
"Heh heh, it's fine. It's already been resolved, thanks to the goddess's protection."
"Ah..?"
It was really thanks to the goddess's guarantee, so calling it protection wasn't wrong.
‘Still, now that I'm saddled with a disciple I never saw coming, I have no idea how to teach her.’
A few things came to mind, but none of them were things you'd make a minor do.
‘Having an arm cut off like I did would probably be a bit much.’
-A-a demon..
It was a baffling remark.
…
‘This is a problem.’
Not long after returning to the church, I couldn't help making a grave face.
It seemed I'd taken this far too lightly.
‘Of all things, the ingredients spoiled.’
It was the price of storing ingredients without a fridge on a sweltering summer day.
-Gasp! Then we starve today?
"We can't have that."
Unless one was on a diet, skipping a meal was out of the question.
-Then the offering's still on, right? I want strawberry cake again!
‘So it was just about the offering.’
It deflated me somehow, but it was a very goddess-like reason.
Though all I'd promised was meals, making a cake for dessert didn't seem like a bad idea.
‘Priest Malja went through a lot emotionally too, so it should be fine.’
-Malja's probably still going through it right now..
I still couldn't tell what that meant, but she was at an age full of worries, so I figured it could be so.
-Do you not have a human heart or something?
"If it's that you don't want to eat cake, understood."
-Eeeek!
I left the goddess's loud shriek behind and was looking for my pouch when it happened.
In a corner of the desk, a book I'd left lying around suddenly caught my eye.
It was the Earth Church scripture I'd borrowed to study back when the Gallery was paralyzed.
‘Might as well return this while I'm at it.’
I'd already read it through once, and now that the Gallery was working fine again, it seemed like a good time to return it.
The goddess had started pestering me when we headed toward the Earth Church.
-Hint..
-Hint…
-Hint….
"..If you have something to say, just say it, Goddess."
I sighed and demanded an answer from the goddess, who was going out of her way to say the word aloud and hint at me.
-Do we really have to go to a place like the Earth Church..?
"You call your mother's church a place like that? Besides, if you borrow something, you're supposed to give it back."
-But my mom's rich, so she probably doesn't need stuff like that anyway..
"The scripture is also the property of the church's people."
-Ngh..
It sounded like she was trying to stop me.
I had a hunch or two about why, so I let out a snort of laughter.
"I'm not converting, so don't worry."
-…
There was no answer.
I suspected she was embarrassed herself.
‘Anyway, it's quite crowded.’
The Earth Church, which I reached after the goddess went quiet, had a fair number of people packed in.
‘Well, it's the religion the whole city believes in, and it's the weekend too, so of course it's crowded.’
Regrettably, it looked like I'd have to sneak the scripture back in.
Luckily, it wasn't service time, so I managed to slide the borrowed scripture back into its original spot.
Just as I was about to head back like that, my eyes met the statue of the Earth Goddess once more.
I held her gaze for a moment, then lightly closed my eyes and bowed my head, same as before.
‘Gaia, I'd be grateful if you could please scold your daughter sternly.’
Then I closed my eyes and opened them again.
"..I didn't expect this."
Before me lay not a chapel but a garden bursting with every kind of plant.
‘Is it because I prayed for her to be scolded?’
It was while I was wondering whether that was a prayer that overstepped for an ordinary human.
"Don't misunderstand. I called you here so that you could scold her yourself, rather than me doing it."
I turned my head toward the voice nearby.
And beyond my turned head, the Earth Goddess, with a vast maternal love that the statue couldn't fully capture, was welcoming me with a smile.
"..This small petal greets the Earth Goddess."
"Heh heh, if you greet me from such a low position, Iris will get angry."
At the same time, the hem of the goddess's skirt swayed.
Maybe I stared, wondering what it was. Behind the goddess's skirt, a little girl with a sulky expression was glaring at me in displeasure.
It wasn't hard to guess who she was.
"Goddess Iris?"
Her gaze came back, full of expectation.
"You're more.. than I imagined.."
"Kinda cute?"
"No, you're smaller, actually?"
"Eeeeeek!!"
The little goddess's scream filled the garden.
I offered a proper greeting only after the screaming had died down to a degree.
"It's a pleasure to meet you. I am your small petal and servant, the Flower Priest, Flowie."
Join our discord at https://dsc.gg/wetried
