WeTried Translations

Translator/Editor: ZERO_SUGAR

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Chapter 117: Malevolent Site

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Life inside a sanctuary was really convenient.

Basically, the ley line's energy constantly replenished my spiritual power within this space.

They say a healthy body houses a healthy soul, but apparently a healthy soul comes with a healthy body too.

Ever since I awakened my spirituality and started living in a house built over a Holy Vein, the stiffness in my body had disappeared. So had my chronic aches.

My back would hurt sometimes, and my vision would get blurry, but since the Declaration of the Holy Realm, I've been in perfect physical condition.

There was something even better, though.

"Ah, I want takoyaki."

"My lord, shall I come with you?"

"It'd be convenient to have Kohaku along since she knows Japanese."

I leaped with Kohaku into an alley in Osaka.

Spatial Leap was literally magic that let me jump to a place I had stepped on before, so to anyone else, it looked like I had suddenly popped into existence.

That was why I usually leaped into empty alleys or hotel bathrooms, but...

"Gah! W-What the hell?!"

"Oh dear."

There was a homeless person where we landed.

They had been sleeping under cardboard, and their eyes went wide when they saw me suddenly appear out of thin air.

"Shall I get rid of them, my lord?"

"Get rid of what?"

I pulled out my wallet, took out a few ten-thousand-yen bills, dropped them into the person's coin cup, and winked.

"Shh~"

Even aside from paying them to keep quiet, nobody would believe them if they reported that someone had suddenly appeared in empty space.

When you did something too unbelievable, it became a secret all by itself. It was surprisingly convenient.

"Still, I should use hotel bathrooms from now on. I got careless because it was close."

"What if you run into someone taking a leak?"

"Hmm... That's true too."

Then should I use the Tsuchimikado Clan Shrine? But that would only get me to Kyoto.

"Why not buy an apartment in every city?"

"An apartment? Wouldn't that be too expensive?"

Spending that much just because I wanted takoyaki was a bit...

"You could use them as rental accommodations and earn income, then only travel there when there are no guests."

"Oh... But wouldn't I need managers too?"

"Buy them in key areas of each city and leave agents in charge. Guests can contact us through Line, and the Eight-Foot Sisters or I can manage everything."

An investment and Spatial Leap points at the same time?

"Kohaku. You're my Zhang Liang and Zhuge Liang!"

"It is only natural as my lord's loyal right hand. Unlike that tiger old fart and that firepower-obsessed noise-pollution ghost."

It seemed Kohaku had been feeling threatened ever since the Mountain Lord joined us.

Anyway, I ordered a huge amount of takoyaki.

I had to get enough for the Eight-Foot Sisters, plus food for Gari, so it was no ordinary order.

"Wow, another group order today?"

The owner said something in Japanese. Since I didn't know Japanese, Kohaku answered for me.

"Please take care of us today as well."

While the takoyaki was cooking, something suddenly crossed my mind.

"I wonder what North Korean food is like."

"You mean North Korea? Haven't you tried food from there before?"

I had.

When we rescued people from the prison camp, I had eaten the food they hurriedly cooked for themselves.

"All they have is corn rice and salted radish sliced crosswise or lengthwise, then they call it a two-side-dish spread."

"Ah, that was kind of shocking. Even slicing it diagonally and calling it a three-side-dish spread."

"South Korea has cultivated such wonderful culture, yet people with the same potential turned out like that. Now I understand communism."

Bashing North Korea together was not bad, but then I remembered the North Korean restaurant we had passed on the way to Aoji Prison Camp.

"Should we go?"

I had never tried a long-distance leap this far, but with support from the Japanese sanctuary, and with just the two of us...

Whooong!

When I opened my eyes, I saw a North Korean restaurant that had barely been put together with a shabby sign and a tent.

There seemed to be workers nearby, because business was fairly lively.

When I approached and opened the door, the warm smell of soybeans hit my nose.

"Welco... me."

The elderly North Korean woman who seemed to own the place stopped speaking when she saw me.

The workers inside also turned to look at me. Probably because of how Kohaku and I looked.

We were a little too neat for North Korea, and Kohaku, transformed, was the kind of beauty people would turn around to stare at anywhere.

But acting brazenly would make us seem less suspicious.

I calmly sat down and even placed an order.

"Artificial-meat rice? Give us two."

I paid with the North Korean money I had taken during my earlier trip to the camp.

Soon, two plates were set before us.

"Hmm..."

"This is different from what I expected."

When I heard artificial meat, I thought they used soy meat because real meat was scarce. But it was nothing like the soy chunks in instant black-bean noodles.

At a glance, it looked like rice wrapped in a thin skin like dried fish jerky, with red seasoning brushed here and there. It was like inari sushi.

"Shall we try it?"

The reason it was called artificial meat was that the skin around the rice tasted somewhat like soy meat.

The chewy soy-meat skin wrapped around the rice, creating a strange texture.

The rice itself was plain and nothing special, but the nutty flavor of soybeans spread through it, and the spicy, salty seasoning went together pretty well.

Still, there was too little rice, and I wished they had added more seasoning.

Three or four pieces of artificial-meat rice cost five hundred North Korean won per bowl.

I didn't know the exchange rate for North Korean money, so I had no idea whether that was expensive or cheap.

As we finished eating and left, I sensed someone following us.

"My lord."

"I saw them too."

Were they planning to rob us because we looked well dressed?

There were three or four of them, but there was no reason to fight.

The moment we entered a suitable alley, I leaped to Osaka.

"W-What?! They disappeared!"

"How did they...?"

* * *

"I brought takoyaki!"

The moment I brought in all the packaged takoyaki, everyone gathered around.

Three hundred pieces for Gari, one hundred sixty for the Eight-Foot Sisters, fifty for the Mountain Lord, and ten each for Kohaku and me.

"If it isn't enough, tell me. I'll buy more."

Right. I should bring some to Pastor Go too.

"Oh, what's going on?"

Pastor Go had been hard at work in the Grand Holy Temple Armory.

Pastor Go didn't even get surprised anymore when I suddenly appeared with Spatial Leap.

"I bought some takoyaki. Please have some. Everyone else should eat some too."

After handing one to each of the other priests and blacksmiths in the Grand Holy Temple Armory, only our portions remained.

"Ah, this is nice. Should we go eat sushi for dinner?"

"I'm fine with anything, my lord."

"My lord, take me with you for dinner too."

"Mountain Lord, you're a tiger. Do you eat seafood?"

"I have lived for hundreds of years. What have I not eaten? Still, I have never been to the land of those Japanese bastards, so I am curious about their food as well."

Maybe that was only natural, since the Mountain Lord had spent their whole life on the Korean Peninsula.

"I just came back from North Korea too, but their food really wasn't much to eat."

It was probably less a problem with their food culture and more because they lacked ingredients.

What about other countries?

"It'd be convenient if I could teleport to other countries too."

"My lord may be the first exorcist to use Spatial Leap just to pick up local food."

"My lord, can't you do it the way you just did?"

"It didn't work well. When I leaped straight from North Korea, my spiritual power was almost completely drained."

I could get from Kyoto to North Korea, but getting from North Korea to South Korea consumed over eighty percent of my spiritual power.

Even considering that Kohaku and I had leaped together, it was not something I could use even two or three times.

Long-distance leaps really were difficult without a sanctuary's support.

"Is the answer to expand my sanctuary?"

Was there somewhere else I could declare a sanctuary? Most dragon nodes already had owners, so they were not easy to find...

Clack, clack!

At that moment, Gari spat a book out of Gari's mouth.

It was After-Kings.

Gari was Opha, a Throne Angel, the king's Throne, and the Book of Enoch's "scribe."

After-Kings, which Gari had spat out, opened. Pure white angel feathers began tracing neat handwriting.

"W-What is this, my lord?"

"Is this your first time seeing it, Mountain Lord?"

It was probably Kohaku's first time seeing a moment of "prophecy" too.

「Kings shall come.」

「The black horse shall set the altar ablaze, and legion commanders shall awaken the fallen kings.」

「They shall fill the holy dwelling with worms, snakes, and unclean things, and raise pillars of hateful fire in the land where the lifelines flow.」

「The awakened kings shall oppose the last king among kings, so that only one king may remain.」

「When kings bite at each other's flesh, when legion devours legion, and when the stars turn red with their blood, the gate of the place of worship shall open.」

* * *

[You need to come to Serbia immediately.]

It was when I consulted Pastor Go about After-Kings' prophecy and contacted Pastor Park.

[It is a Malevolent Site. The Malevolent Site is about to be completed! I will explain when you get here. Bring everyone and everything you can!]

The prophecy of After-Kings, and the simultaneous Ill-Omened Site transformations across Eastern Europe.

Pastor Park was urgently calling us in, so the situation seemed serious.

To get to Serbia in Eastern Europe, we had to pass through Istanbul, but the Exorcist Network existed there too.

Batajnica Air Base, Serbia.

As we prepared to get off the military plane, I saw MiG fighter jets waiting at the airfield.

They were the same fighters I had seen in political education classes when I was in the military.

I never thought I would see them in person.

I was staring out the window because it was so interesting when Cha Hyeran spoke to me.

"Brother Yohan. We need to get off."

"Are we there already?"

"What are you looking at?"

"MiG fighters. North Korea has them too, right? Have you ever seen one?"

Cha Hyeran looked at the MiGs outside and curled up the corner of her mouth.

"The MiGs in the Republic are decorations that cannot even fly. They did not have parts for them, and after they got scammed trying to smuggle some in from Mongolia, they did not even touch them."

"Why Mongolia?"

"They even transferred money to a Mongolian general to smuggle MiG parts. But then that bastard got arrested, didn't he? They only lost their money."

It was already strange that they operated fifty-year-old fighters, but they even got scammed buying parts. At that point, it was just sad.

"Still, are you sure about this? I keep asking, but you really don't have to come."

"Under Jesus's guidance, I met a distinguished person like you, Brother Yohan. Isn't it only natural to repay the Gospel I've received?"

Pastor Go and I had both tried to stop her, but Cha Hyeran was determined.

Still, she was a Christian and a powerful sorcerer, so she would be helpful.

For reference, I gave the fire snake back before we came.

"Let's go."

The military plane carried not just us, but Pastor Go and a large group of exorcists from Holy Temple Church.

Naturally, Gari, the Eight-Foot Sisters, the Mountain Lord, and Kohaku were included too.

Before unloading the Gugu legion and the heavy equipment from the cargo hold, I saw clergy waiting right in front of us.

A priest stood at their head, with monks and nuns behind them. They seemed to have been waiting for us.

"Welcome, everyone from Holy Temple Church."

Their Korean was a little awkward, but there was no major problem communicating.

"I am Pastor Go Jincheol. Pastor Park Tae-jin is..."

"Pastor Park Tae-jin is at the cathedral. I will guide you there."

At the Serbian military airport, we got into the vehicles they had prepared.

"Who are they?"

We were not the only ones who had arrived at the military airport.

Clergy guided by other priests and nuns were boarding vehicles one after another.

"They are the Saint Cyril Exorcist Society from Bulgaria. The Holy See Knights, who have a long history, came with them as well."

"Are exorcist priests coming from other regions too?"

"Yes. The Cappadocian Saints Society, the Kyiv Sanctuary Guard, the Saint Ulrich Cross Knights, the Saint Martin Exorcist Society... Many other brothers and sisters have willingly come as well."

So many exorcists were gathering from all over the world.

Pastor Park had mentioned a Malevolent Site. This was clearly no ordinary problem.

This was not even comparable to the Night Parade of One Hundred Demons held to resurrect the Kyoto White-Faced Golden-Furred Nine-Tailed Fox.

Soon, black SUVs drove out along the perimeter road around the runway one after another.

Around ten vehicles.

The supplies we had brought would be transported separately, while Serbian armored vehicles escorted us ahead and behind.

It was a dark night.

There were not many streetlights, so the road was dark, but the starlight shone clearly.

Maybe there was not much pollution. The stars were sparkling so brightly...

"Pastor Go? What is that..."

"It's a rocket!!"

A flame drew a clear trail beneath the pitch-black sky.

Its trail formed an arc before plunging toward the lead vehicle in an instant.

KABOOOOOM!!

Footnotes:

In the joke about “two-side-dish” and “three-side-dish” spreads, cheop counts the side dishes in a Korean meal. The same pickled radish is being counted as multiple dishes simply because it is sliced in different directions.

Zhang Liang and Zhuge Liang are famous Chinese strategists.

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