WeTried Translations
Translator/Editor: ZERO_SUGAR
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Chapter 132: Helsing Family (3)
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"You're telling me to hunt vampires?"
"Yeah. The Helsing Family's youngest is having his coming-of-age ceremony, so tag along and catch a few vampires."
One condition was that Gari and my familiars could not participate.
That meant no Eight-Foot Sister or Mountain Lord, of course, and I could not use Jinju or Gugu's legion either.
"The goal is to teach you how to use your spiritual scent and train you to respond in extreme situations."
"Isn't that too dangerous? I know you like to make training realistic, but if a vampire bites me, I'll become one too."
Live training was supposedly best, but this seemed like way too much risk.
"I feel a little awkward saying this, but don't I have a pretty precious body?"
Wasn't I the king of After-Kings?
What I had realized through this incident was that the 72 Demons I had to face were far more dangerous than I had imagined.
Dangerous enough that, if they went on a rampage, the destruction of the human world no longer sounded like a joke.
And I was their natural counter.
I had King Solomon's authority, which did not merely drive demons manifested in this world out of it. I could make them into slaves and command them.
"Instead of cherishing and protecting me, you're going to throw me around?"
"I didn't put it quite like that."
"Do I even need to explain why? This time, Yohan, if you had known how to handle yourself even half as well as Pastor Go, would you have had to struggle through rescues while getting stabbed over and over?"
The fundamentals would not have changed much, but we probably would not have needed to resolve it so simply.
There might have been a better way.
"Demons are evil. We are taught love, forgiveness, and understanding, but demons are different. They are evil itself. Even their methods are evil."
Like how they had beguiled our allies this time, laid traps, sought to divide us, and forced compromises.
Even the Templar Order had fallen for that trick.
If our side had not been absurdly strong, we might have fallen for it too.
"In this world, individual fighting ability matters. It is a spiritual world that military firepower cannot overcome."
"It sounds strange coming from someone who punches holes through rocky mountains."
"Why are all my disciples so good at saying things that deserve a beating? Yohan, you sometimes remind me of Pastor Kim."
Pastor Kim used to get beaten up?
I could not picture it at all, though it made sense if Pastor Park was involved.
"Anyway, training yourself is indispensable. More than anything, I want your physical instincts and reflexes to improve. Or you could get a chemical boost."
"Vampire elixir..."
Pastor Park nodded at my mutter.
"Besides, vampires are quick and cunning. Vampire hunters are especially strong among those who hunt monsters and ghosts because they cannot survive otherwise."
What did not kill me made me stronger, or something like that.
"But vampires are also suitable training targets for another reason."
"Aren't they ridiculously strong monsters?"
"They are strong, but they have a terrible matchup against you, Yohan. More importantly, you have the best escape move there is."
If things went wrong, I could at least run away at full power. That was the first reason.
"The reason vampires are especially powerful is not their physical abilities or their bizarre tricks. Other creatures can do those things too."
Werewolves had better physical abilities, and many yokai could use sorcery.
"Vampires are dangerous because they are pathogens."
"Pathogens?"
"Yes. Their ability to infect people with a bite, turning them into draculs or ghouls. Bloodsucking."
That was true.
Their infection ability was why there had been such chaos when vampires entered the country.
"But for East Asians, Western-born vampires' bloodsucking ability is useless against Koreans and Chinese."
"Huh?"
Bloodsucking did not work on Koreans and Chinese?
The reason was...
* * *
"Kyaaaah!"
The female vampire lunged at me.
Should I dodge? Use Spatial Leap?
No. I should test it once.
I had plenty of time to evade, but I deliberately allowed the attack.
Crunch!
Her teeth sank in. There was a sharp sting, and then I felt her trying to drink my blood.
When male and female virgins were fed on by vampires, they became draculs or draculinas.
It was insane that a species that drank blood cared about virginity, but by that rule, I should have become a dracul.
But then...
"Kegh! Gah! Kyaaaah!"
The female vampire shoved me away with a pained expression.
"Wow, it really works?"
She had only taken a mouthful, but the pungent, spicy scent made her writhe in agony.
"Kyaaaah! Korean! You're a fucking Korean garlic man!!"
"What?! Yellow monkey? You're a fucking racist?!"
"That's not exactly what she said..."
Whish-whish-whish!
The vampire dodged the flying Gutenberg holy swords.
Her side had been cut, and she was bleeding heavily, but it was probably not a serious injury for a vampire.
"Ugh... Why is a Korean here...?"
Rather than tending to the wound at her side, the vampire kept retching, trying to vomit up the blood she had drunk.
The reason she was suffering so badly was garlic.
「Garlic has a spiritual quality that purifies decay. Vampires eat people, take their blood and souls, and corrupt their own souls. For beings that reject birth, aging, sickness, and death, pure silver and garlic, which purifies decay, are practically divine punishment.」
「And Koreans consume twenty percent of the world's garlic. That is why Koreans are called the ultimate anti-vampire weapons.」
「Oh... But we're not the only ones who eat garlic, are we?」
「Chinese people have strong resistance to vampires for the same reason. But that doesn't make them completely invincible. China has many vampire breeds, such as painted-skin vampires, white-bone corpse demons, and blood-eating demons.」
Apparently, Chinese vampires did occasionally exist because of that.
Western vampires sometimes fed on Chinese people from regions where garlic consumption was low.
「There are a lot of people there, so there is all kinds of stuff. It is also difficult for exorcists to operate there because of religious persecution.」
「Does Korea not have any vampire yokai?」
「The tigers culled most of those.」
「Ah...」
Anyway, vampires apparently called Koreans fucking garlic men with garlic blood.
Thanks to that, Koreans were almost immune to bloodsucking.
I had tested it, and judging by how violently she was reacting, it was safe to say we really did resist it.
"Yohan! Even if Koreans have garlic blood, it is not impossible for a vampire to feed on you if they truly mean it, unless they are a vegan vampire!"
Vegan vampire? Was that a thing?
Maybe they only drank animal blood instead of human blood?
"I know. I was just testing it."
"Do Koreans not understand safety?"
The vampire, who had nearly gotten a nasty surprise from me, glared at us warily.
"Helsing...! You have brought in those cursed bastards again!"
"What is she saying?"
"She called you cursed fucking garlic men."
"You fucking racists?!"
The vampire backed away slowly, remaining on guard.
Was she going to run?
"She's getting away!"
"Damn it!"
Adrian fired his rifle, but though a few bats fell, he could not stop her escape.
"Yohan! Stop her!"
"How?"
"With that mystical Eastern sorcery of yours!"
"Hey, that's a dangerous thing to say. What kind of Orientalism is that? It's racist too."
The abilities I used had been bestowed by the Lord.
To expect Eastern occultism from a genuine Christian exorcist like me...
Still, I had no way to block her escape.
The Gutenberg Bible's barrier only worked when there was an entrance, so that left...
"Namah samanta vajranam chanda maharoshana. Sphotaya hum trat ham mam!"
The moment I recited the mantra, a chain sprang from my waist toward the bats.
Pastor Kim Collection, Indian History Series No. 7, Fudo Myoo's Vajra Lasso.
It was the rope used to bind demons by Acalanatha, Mahavairocana's messenger and guardian of Esoteric Buddhism.
It could bind even a great yokai, but the Vajra Lasso only caught a single bat.
"Ugh... Is it registering as a single target?"
"That really is Eastern mysticism!"
"I told you it isn't."
Adrian did not stay idle. He pulled out some kind of harpoon gun and fired it at the fleeing swarm of bats. It turned into a net that covered them.
Kyaak!
Kiiiek!
The bats caught in clusters struggled, but they could not exert any strength against the glittering net, which appeared to be made of silver.
Adrian pressed a button on the harpoon gun. The silver net drew tight, crushing the bats to death.
"Oh, that thing from the movies. Like PreXator."
"Tch. Did some get away?"
"What happens now?"
"Tch... We can't pursue them now. The bats will scatter in every direction and throw us off."
That was true.
If they scattered and fled like that, there was no way to catch them.
"Some vampires can use mist transformation too. Unless we seal them in with a barrier from the start, they must be difficult to pursue."
"It's unfortunate, but today's hunt will have to end here..."
"I said it would be difficult, not impossible."
"???"
* * *
Rumble!
On a rainy night, the roar of thunder and lightning lit the dank darkness of the sewers.
"Ugh... I lost too much blood."
Elise Dake staggered from severe anemia.
Vampires could divide their bodies, but they could not exceed the limits of their total mass.
For every bat she had lost, she had lost blood, and Elise had lost nearly half the blood in her body.
Fortunately, she had escaped.
She had scattered the remaining hundreds of bats in every direction, completely throwing off their pursuers.
Chasing a vampire that had decided to flee was nearly impossible.
Even vampire hunters could only hunt vampires after setting a perfect trap.
With an accidental encounter like this, they could easily escape.
"Elise?"
"Finn!"
Elise threw herself at the kin she encountered in the sewers.
Finn Dake saw his anemic younger sister and let out a vicious growl.
"Who was it? Who dared?"
"H-Helsing! Helsing's hunters did this to me!"
"Helsing?"
Vampires in Europe could not possibly fail to know the Helsing Family.
They were the ones who had driven a stake through the heart of the Count, progenitor of all vampires, and thwarted the Count again when the Count returned.
"That is not all! Church bastards! That fucking Korean was there too!"
"...Holy Temple Church?"
The Vatican, the Helsing Family, Lincoln, and Holy Temple Church.
Those four were the greatest enemies of modern vampire clans.
The Vatican's exorcists, who had hunted vampires for ages.
The Helsing Family, which had driven a stake through the progenitor Count's heart a hundred years ago.
Lincoln, who had stopped a plot to seduce the American president and start a civil war.
Holy Temple Church, which had driven a stake through the heart of the Count reborn in the modern age and buried it somewhere unknown.
Two of the forces that every vampire considered irreconcilable enemies had come here?
"Could it be that they caught on to our plan...?"
Rustle!
At that moment, sheets of paper covered the sewer walls.
When they sealed the walls and even the cover that served as the sewer's entrance and exit, they formed a barrier.
"Who is it...?!"
Unlike Finn, who growled viciously, Elise drew in a breath and stared into the darkness.
Step... Step...
A man in a coat approached from the darkness, holding two swords.
"We are God's agents. The earthly executors of divine punishment. Our mission is... to annihilate the foolish who defy our God, down to every last shred of flesh."
The two swords crossed.
Crack!
With a flash of lightning, they met the gaze of the man holding his crossed swords in the shape of a cross.
"AEEEEE... MEN!"
They saw the madness in his gleaming eyes as he cried out that chilling battle cry.
"...Why are all people from Holy Temple Church like this?"
Was this a basic qualification for Korean exorcists?
Adrian seriously wondered.
It was plagiarized, though.
Footnotes:
Yohan's dramatic declaration parodies a line from the manga and anime Hellsing.
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