WeTried Translations

Translator/Editor: Alyo

Discord: https://dsc.gg/wetried

◈ Surviving Among the Anomalies ◈

Chapter 15: Suspicious Merchant

──────

Safety Grade anomalies were safe for a simple reason. Unlike dangerous anomalies, their abilities and peculiarities posed no danger.

[Gangneung Arboretum]

Of course, some were safe because they were friendly to humans, but anomalies like that were as rare as the Seven-Headed Snake, so they were beside the point. Since they were nothing particularly special, they should not have been popular. And if they were unpopular, there should not have been many of them.

[Arboretum Souvenir Shop]

Yet there were many kinds of safety anomalies despite their lack of popularity. That was because the game registered on Steam had achievements, and the creator had included encountering and collecting safety anomalies among them.

“Do you have a flowerpot painted half yellow and half pink? It has a cornucopia drawn along the border between the two colors.”

“Pardon? A cornu... copia?”

“It’s a large horn-shaped basket with fruit inside.”

“Ah, I’ll check the storage room.”

When Surviving Among the Anomalies had still been a game, I had never cared much about achievements, so I had not gone out of my way to collect safety anomalies. Now that it had become reality, I had spent the last two weeks searching for them.

“I found it! It was tucked away in a corner of the storage room! How did you know to look for it?”

“I remembered seeing it before. How much is it?”

“It’s 5,000 won!”

That took care of every safety anomaly I could obtain immediately, the ones that appeared in fixed locations and whose locations were clearly known. I returned home with the flowerpot I had bought at the arboretum and lined up all the safety anomalies I had collected in the living room.

“Only five, huh?”

Starting with the one on the far left, I looked over them one by one.

“Rubber Rubber Duck.”

A small rubber duck that occasionally went 『Quack』 when no one was looking at it while it shared the same space.

“Peace to the Big Toe.”

Nail polish that instantly cured ingrown toenails when applied and ensured they would never develop again for the rest of one’s life.

“Mr. Ando’s All-Purpose Sauce.”

An endless sauce bottle that, when poured over food, changed to the flavor that best complemented it, no matter how much was used.

- Quack!

“WK Special Tumbler.”

A tumbler marked with a ‘WK’ logo. Filling it with a carbonated drink charged its fizz to the maximum, and the carbonation never faded over time.

“Flowerpot of the God of Plenty.”

A flowerpot that made the plant grown inside bear a random fruit with a random flavor once a month.

These five safety anomalies felt less like anomalies and more like unusual, special objects.

‘I’ll use these in my trade with the Mysterious Merchant.’

- Quack!

The Mysterious Merchant.

True to the name, the merchant was suspicious in every way. In the game, they exchanged safety anomalies collected by players for other special anomalies, anomaly byproducts, rare objects, or living creatures.

“There were a lot of anomalies and items that could only be obtained from the Mysterious Merchant.”

The merchant’s appearance location was random, so I had not encountered them until now. Thanks to the Golden Omnipotence Corporation, though, I now knew where they were.

“Did you finish all your food?”

After gathering the anomalies, I looked inside the plastic case on the shelf. The Seven-Headed Snake, its belly swollen round, struggled to breathe from overeating.

“You already ate everything?”

It had not been implemented in the game, but according to the wiki, the Mysterious Merchant traded not just anomalies, but rare plants, animals, and objects as well.

“I guess I should use you as trade stock too.”

I had grown a little attached to it, but it was only about as precious to me as a cup I liked. It was nowhere near the level of a pet.

- Quack!

‘I’ll leave tomorrow.’

I put all five kinds of safety anomalies, including Rubber Rubber Duck, into a bag and headed for the bedroom. It was already late in the evening, so I planned to sleep early, wake up, and head for the Mysterious Merchant.

‘A letter? An invitation?’

A single letter lay on my pillow.

I immediately opened the envelope and checked its contents.

[Mr. Lee Seung-hoon, having survived contact with numerous anomalies, you possess sufficient good fortune and ability to qualify for a trade with me. Therefore, I send you this invitation in the hopes of a pleasant transaction. If you step outside while carrying this invitation, you will be able to come to my store.]

There was no need to wonder who had sent it.

“They said they would send an invitation soon.”

What a pain.

- Quack!

I had no choice but to go right away.

I took the bag containing the anomalies and the Seven-Headed Snake, along with the invitation, and stepped through the front door. The entrance that should have led to the garden was connected to another interior.

“Have you arrived?”

A narrow shop crammed full of miscellaneous junk.

And a bizarre figure with six arms sat behind the counter and greeted me.

“Welcome, Mr. Lee Seung-hoon.”

The Mysterious Merchant looked exactly as depicted in the game’s illustration. I set down my bag and held out my hand.

“It’s nice to meet you, Merchant.”

The voice was different from what I had expected, which only made it more interesting.

- Quack!

＊＊＊

The Mysterious Merchant could not be called good-looking, even as empty flattery.

“I’m pleased to have a customer after such a long time.”

The merchant’s skin was excessively white, as if covered in a layer of chalk powder, and there was not a single strand of body hair. The merchant’s eyes were narrow and slitted, while the mouth and nose were so small that, unless one looked closely, it seemed the merchant had no facial features at all.

“Do you like the tea?”

More than anything, the merchant’s voice had been unexpected.

Like any indie game, Surviving Among the Anomalies had no voice actors for its characters. The Mysterious Merchant had been no exception.

“Yes, I do. What kind of tea is this?”

“It’s brain tea, brewed from human brains.”

“I see.”

“You’re not much for jokes. It’s ordinary milk tea.”

The Mysterious Merchant’s voice was that of a woman. It was clear, pleasant, and beautiful to listen to.

“Are you an anomaly?”

“You ask very directly. From your perspective, if I am an anomaly, then I am one. Perspectives are relative, after all. From my perspective, you are the anomaly.”

“A play on words.”

“A play on words.”

As we talked, I examined the merchant’s body. Unfortunately, it was covered by a thick coat like the kind locomotive engineers in cold regions might wear, so I could tell nothing.

“More importantly, I would like to make a trade.”

“Yes, but first, please read the rules.”

The merchant’s six hands pointed to the counter.

[General Store Trade Rules]

[1. Trades are conducted with objects, not currency.]

[2. If the item is alive, it cannot be used as trade stock unless it consents.]

[3. After a trade is completed, compensation cannot be demanded from the merchant even if the received item causes trouble or harm.]

[4. If someone inflicts physical or mental harm upon the merchant, the merchant bears no responsibility for anything that happens afterward.]

[5. Gold is not accepted.]

“I’ve read them all. But why don’t you accept gold?”

“Because the Corporation gives me trouble over it.”

“I see.”

“That is correct. Now, would you take out the items you wish to trade?”

I took the safety anomalies from my bag. Rubber Rubber Duck came first.

“What an interesting anomaly.”

The merchant’s narrow, slitted eyes instantly widened. The merchant’s pupils expanded until billiard balls could fit inside them, then repeatedly enlarged and shrank like the aperture of a lens. The merchant’s six hands gripped Rubber Rubber Duck and turned it this way and that.

“But there are two problems. First, I enjoy quiet. This child lives to disturb my peace for its own amusement, and thinking about the stress I would suffer before it sold makes me reluctant.”

“I understand.”

“The second problem is that this child does not wish to come to me.”

“Are you saying it doesn’t want to be sold?”

“Yes. It wants to stay with you. It wanted to see you get startled, but you were never startled even once, so it has become stubborn about it.”

Interesting. I had not expected even a trivial anomaly like Rubber Rubber Duck to possess a sense of self.

“Oh, this is...”

Next, the merchant appraised Peace to the Big Toe.

“One of Dr. Janus’s early products. But I have no toenails, and I do not think my other customers would like it either.”

Then the merchant appraised the WK Special Tumbler.

“This was a product distributed at the thousandth-anniversary ceremony of a fast-food restaurant opened by WK Corporation. If it had been another product, perhaps, but this was only a participation prize and has little meaning. It does not seem likely to appeal to my other customers either, so it has no market value.”

Next came Mr. Ando’s All-Purpose Sauce.

“Ah! Mr. Ando’s sauce! A sauce bottle made by the legendary chef whose reservations take a hundred years. This has market value!”

“Does it?”

“Yes. Many of my customers seek fine cuisine, so this will satisfy a great many of them. I may even have to hold an auction for the first time in a while.”

At last, an anomaly that could be traded.

“Is there an item you desire? If not, I will choose an item of equal value for you. On a merchant’s honor, I swear that I will never lower the price.”

“There is something I want.”

I pointed to the fountain pen sticking out of a pencil holder in the back.

“Is that Legacy of the Great Novelist?”

“You are quite knowledgeable. Yes, it is. Would you like to trade for that? It is far less valuable, though.”

“Yes. I’ll take that.”

I exchanged the fountain pen for the sauce bottle.

‘Now I have a way to obtain a status.’

Next was the Flowerpot of the God of Plenty.

“I like this as well. The fact that it holds the power of a foolish transcendent is a drawback, but the fact that it produces fruit with completely different flavors and appearances regardless of the type of plant grown in it is a great strength.”

The merchant had said many customers sought fine cuisine, and this received glowing praise as well.

“I will trade this too. What would you like to do this time?”

“There is something I want.”

Something I had been thinking about since before coming here.

“I want to enter the Broken Ark. Is that possible?”

The merchant nodded.

“It is possible.”

＊＊＊

From the moment I learned of the future one month ahead through the Dial TV, I had considered how I could survive.

What the hostile anomaly was.

What its weakness was.

What traits it had in the game and how I could escape when I encountered it.

What information had been written on the wiki.

After considering everything, I had concluded that I absolutely had to enter a place called the Broken Ark to survive. It could only be entered through the Mysterious Merchant.

“It is here.”

That was because the Broken Ark was a Fixed Anomaly owned by the Mysterious Merchant.

The merchant led me farther into the shop. Passing countless objects, we arrived at a storage room containing a small wooden room that looked as though it had been forcibly ripped out of somewhere.

“Do you know what this is?”

“Yes, I do.”

The Broken Ark.

According to the wiki, it was an anomaly said to be the ark Noah had made, only to be defiled and cursed by later Antichrists.

“It may be a difficult place for a human to endure.”

“That’s fine. I need time.”

“Then I suppose you will be fine.”

Once inside, closing the door transported a person to a special space, where they had to remain trapped for one year.

Outside time did not pass while one was inside. Players called it the Room of Spirit and Time, and it was often used to gain attributes.

‘Depending on the type of training chosen before entering, the corresponding attribute rose dramatically.’

It was a shame that the anomaly could only be used once in a lifetime.

“If I enter now, I suppose we’ll meet again a year from now.”

“Most likely. I will have tea ready for you.”

“Then...”

After we finished speaking, I opened the old wooden door.

The moment I stepped inside and closed it, I was transported somewhere that was not the shop.

“So this is Noah’s Ark.”

Before I knew it, I was standing on a deck.

On the deck of a massive ship sailing across an endless sea.

“It’s far larger than an aircraft carrier.”

Could a moving island be like this?

“Well, it would have to be. It needs to carry a pair of every animal in the world.”

On the deck sat food in two bowls and a cup.

“Rye bread, milk, and cheese.”

The taste was not bad. It was not good, either.

After I finished all the food and blinked, the plates and cup were full again.

“Just as it was described.”

I took a moment to look over the sea, then pulled Notebook in My Head from my clothes.

“I’m lucky Legacy of the Great Novelist was available.”

The anomalies the merchant sold appeared at random every time the game was launched, so I had worried the Legacy of the Great Novelist might not be among them.

“If it had not, I would have bought an anomaly or item that could endlessly replace ink.”

Legacy of the Great Novelist was an elegant fountain pen.

Aside from the ON/OFF button at its top, it did not look like an anomaly.

“Really, unless I press the button, it is only a fountain pen that produces infinite ink.”

Using it to obtain a status would come later.

For now, the endless ink was enough.

“Now then...”

I lay down on the floor and opened Notebook in My Head.

“If I want to write it all within a year, I won’t have time to rest.”

I began preparing to survive the anomaly the Dial TV had foretold.

Footnotes:

Join our discord at https://dsc.gg/wetried