WeTried Translations

Translator: Coughing Baby

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◈ The Inept Mage’s Infinite Regression

Chapter 17

Soon after, a blonde student approached Ethan and Boen’s seats, grabbed the rabbit by both ears, and lifted it up. The student was handling the rabbit rather roughly, and Ethan couldn’t help but note how tall she was—taller than Boen, though shorter than Ethan. He recalled that she was technically born of a knight family.

Her hair was braided into three strands draped over her left shoulder. Though her hair bore no decorations, it clearly took a lot of effort. She either had someone to help her or was very diligent in getting ready in the morning. Her hairstyle came across as aristocratic, and rightly so—it was one of the traditional hairstyles of the Kardien royal family.

Maya Onik hugged the rabbit and said, “Ah, sorry. My familiar disrupted your meal, didn’t it?”

The brown rabbit’s mouth moved. “May all of you be cursed,” it said in a husky voice.

Maya awkwardly laughed and patted the rabbit, and the rabbit snuggled into her arms. “Weib, don’t say things like that.”

“I am emptiness incarnate.”

“All right, I’m sorry. I’ll give you a snack when we get back to the room.”

“All flesh shall wither away.”

“Yes, dried apples,” Maya replied. Then, to Ethan and Boen, she added, “Sorry, this familiar talks a bit too much.”

Boen, unable to ignore the elephant in the room, pointed out, “It doesn’t sound like it’s merely talkative.”

“I haven’t quite managed to tune my familiar properly. I’m still not good at handling familiars,” Maya explained.

“Hmm, I’m not sure that’s true. In our year, there aren’t many students who can even handle a familiar. You should have more confidence in your abilities,” Boen said.

“Thanks.”

“My father also had a familiar that wouldn’t listen to him," Ethan chimed in. "I used to see it frequently while helping with odd jobs around the family estate. That familiar hated people so much that it went around biting guests. It was usually locked up, so I seldom saw it except by my father’s side. But then, on Festival Day, it escaped and caused a huge uproar. After that, Father stopped making me do those chores.”

Maya asked, “Why you? And what did your chores have to do with it?”

“I let it out. I didn’t want to do those chores.”

Maya laughed in response.

“Why did you do that?" asked Boen. "Judging by your magical skill, wouldn’t becoming a scribe suit you better than attending the magic academy?”

“What do you mean? I’m a man who passed Basic Magic Practice!” Ethan retorted.

“I believe you’re a man who should have failed Basic Magic Practice. How do you pass Basic Magic Practice with only body magic?”

Maya laughed even louder. When she calmed down, she said, “So this is Boen, and you’re… Ethan, right?”

“It’s nice to meet you, Maya,” Ethan replied.

Boen also gave her a polite nod.

Maya glanced at Ethan and Boen with narrowed eyes. “It’s surprising to see you two together. How long have you been close?”

It was unusual to see the top student and a potential dropout candidate hanging out. After a semester at Yurmus Magic Academy, most students had at least a sense of who got along and who didn’t, so it seemed odd.

Boen snuck a quick look at Ethan. Outwardly, it wasn’t significant enough for anyone else to read into, but Ethan recognized it as a plea for help.

Ethan placed his arm around Boen’s shoulder and said, “I decided to join the Combat Magic Society on Boen’s recommendation. Right?”

Though Ethan had never mentioned this plan before, Boen adjusted his glasses, looking slightly surprised, and answered, “Yes, that’s right.”

“Combat magic, huh? That’s not very aristocratic,” Maya remarked.

Suddenly, a quest window popped up before Ethan’s eyes:

[Quest generated!]
[Quest: Find Evidence that Maya Onik is a Dark Mage (C)]

[Quest generated!]
[Quest: Become Closer to Maya Onik (D)]

In order to find evidence that Maya was a dark mage, he would obviously need more chances to interact with her. And to increase those chances, he’d need to get closer to her. Ethan realized this was the perfect time to dig in.

Ethan sent a meaningful look Maya’s way and said, “Is that really how you see it?”

“What do you mean?” Maya asked.

“As mages, there will inevitably come a time when we have to use combat magic.”

“When would I need to use combat magic?”

“In a family war, perhaps?”

Among non-mage nobles—and among royalty in particular—"wars" were often fought through intrigue to preserve lineages and power. Even so, they were not publicly announced as wars. Everyone knew they happened, but officially, it was treated as if they didn’t. Such discussions occurred in social gatherings, audience halls, and private chambers, but they were never recorded in official records.

Mages, however, had their own take. Unlike in typical noble families—where the eldest child normally inherited the title of young lord by default—every mage in a mage family potentially qualified to succeed as head of the household. Even among siblings, mages simply varied in power too much, unlike non-mage families where all siblings were roughly equally capable.

If everything was given to an eldest child who lacked talent, a younger sibling with far more magical power might become discontent. Instead, the family head might choose to give the position of young lord to the youngest child, if they were the strongest. However, not every set of mage children had such an extreme disparity. As a result, many mage families had formally introduced feuds between siblings or even more distant relatives—so-called “family wars”—into their succession procedures.

For non-mage nobles, led by kings, family wars were a chance to weaken mage families. At the same time, mages saw them as a way to guarantee their right of succession. Both sides found a shared interest in this arrangement. Most importantly, it was agreed that this official “family war” format prevented even greater chaos and damage.

Though the nature of family wars could vary from house to house—or even with the family head’s decrees—the general rule was that one had to kill, subjugate, or banish the other candidates. It was impossible to avoid combat in those circumstances.

Maya shook her head slightly at Ethan’s comment. “No, I won’t have a family war. There’s too much of an age gap between me and my younger siblings. By the time they’re old enough, I plan to find them good marriage prospects.”

One way to expel a sibling was by marrying them off, which was quite a gentle approach. Not all mages were ambitious, after all. Some family wars ended peacefully, especially when there was a large power gap between candidates.

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Ethan already knew this, though. 'I only brought up family wars to get the conversation going.'

To Maya, Ethan said, “That’s fortunate, then. But even aside from that, mages will face trouble. Non-mage nobles often covet and pick fights over the land and resources of mage families. Royalty often fear the power of mages and send assassins. Above all, other mages may challenge you to steal your arcane knowledge.”

For that reason, mages generally acquired some proficiency in protective magic, much like knights learned horsemanship, spearmanship, and swordsmanship. But protective magic was only part of combat magic.

“I’m capable enough of defending myself. There’s no need for it to specifically be combat magic, right? If the odds are against me, I’d rather run away,” Maya said.

Protective magic focused on evasion and defense, or single combat at most. Most mages thought anything bigger was unnecessary.

“If a mage is forced to fight a large number of enemies, that means they didn’t handle their affairs properly," she continued, repeating a common principle. "A truly skilled mage knows where they stand and where they need to go. You can’t afford to lose your way.”

Were Maya an ordinary mage, Ethan might not have bothered trying to spark her interest in combat magic. Maya was anything but ordinary, however; she was a dark mage.

“So, Maya… you’re certain you won’t lose your way?”

She started to retort, “Of course I—”

But suddenly, her words trailed off, and she glanced around to see if anyone was eavesdropping.

<As expected, no dark mage would be so confident in broad daylight.>

<Speaking from experience?>

Ethan had no intention of accusing her of dark magic right here, she’d just deny it. It would only serve to increase her suspicion of him.

Instead, he said, “Combat magic is useful in dire situations, like if you’re being hunted by many enemies. It’s a way to break through if you’re prepared beforehand. Otherwise, you’ll be helpless.”

“Can such a thing really happen?” Boen asked, looking puzzled.

Ethan and Maya responded simultaneously.

“It can.”

“It will.”

Ethan elaborated, “Take your family, the Oniks of the Kardien Kingdom, for example. They’re under constant pressure from the Arnesia Empire. I don’t think war is imminent, but you never know. If the king of Kardien calls for troops, the Onik family will be summoned, and you, as their heir, might have to head to the battlefield.”

Once, Ethan would have considered that an extreme scenario. Now, however, he knew that imperial spies were already lurking in Yurmus, which meant the situation at the border was likely worse. It might not be that particular issue, of course. Maya was a dark mage, and as such, she didn’t need to worry about just the Empire; the Mage Council might hunt her down at any time.

“…That’s an unpleasant assumption, but I suppose it doesn’t hurt to anticipate worst-case scenarios,” Maya conceded.

“Exactly,” Ethan said. “So if you’re interested, why not join the Combat Magic Society?”

“Well… I’ll think about it,” Maya replied.

After Maya left, Boen turned to Ethan. “Do you think Maya will join?”

“No idea. But trying can’t hurt, right?”

“More importantly, do you really plan to join the Combat Magic Society, Ethan?”

“What do you think?”

“Well, I suppose you could, but the president, Linav Promorus, can be quite fickle. She loves pranks and sometimes changes her opinion on a whim.”

Ethan smiled. “Don’t worry.”

Note: The author decided to wait until Linav’s third appearance to reveal that she is female. Previous chapters will be corrected.

∞

After finishing their meal, the two headed to the Combat Magic Society’s shared workshop. Sure enough, the society’s president, Linav, recognizable by her long, flowing blonde hair, her dark complexion, and the diamond-shaped mark on the bridge of her nose, was present.

As soon as Ethan stated that he wanted to join the Combat Magic Society, Linav declared, “No way.”

“May I ask why?” Ethan responded, caught off guard. Unlike last time, this was a firm refusal.

“I heard you use body magic. Sure, plenty of mages use it as a secondary discipline, but no one relies solely on body magic for combat magic. Basic Magic Practice is about testing a mage’s minimum capabilities, and using body magic alone proves you don’t have a foundation in other schools. That’s no different from a knight,” Linav replied.

“Well, you’re not wrong. But can’t you at least let me take a test?”

“…We’ll see.”

Ethan didn’t find Linav’s attitude particularly strange. While there was nothing inherently wrong with body magic, a mage’s identity was often tied to doing what non-mages could not do. From that perspective, someone who could only do what anyone else could do couldn’t be seen as a “real” mage. The last time Ethan had come here, Linav had probably just been curious to watch Ethan fight an automaton with fireworks.

'What a difficult personality,' Ethan thought. He figured that if he pushed the issue, he might be able to pique Linav’s curiosity and get another chance to fight an automaton… but he soon changed tactics.

“All right. In that case, President…”

“Huh?”

“Let’s make a bet. ‘Will Ethan Dora Charasen join the Combat Magic Society?’ ”

“What are you talking about? That bet can’t even resolve the issue.”

“I know you don’t want me in the society, but I believe I will join. If you’re certain I won’t, then take the bet. Otherwise, forget it.”

“I’m the one who decides whether you join, though?”

“I’m aware.”

“What do you want, then? For your information, there’s nothing I really want from you,” Linav said.

Ethan mentioned a certain cake, from the bakery in town, that his half-sister Arca Wiz Charasen sometimes brought back as a gift.

Thankfully, it seemed Linav knew of it. “ ‘The Corner Bakery,’ you mean?” she asked.

“I don’t know its name for sure,” Ethan replied.

“If Arca mentioned it, that’s definitely the place. It’s on the corner by the town square, so people call it The Corner Bakery. A baker and a cook from the South run it, and they import all their ingredients from the South.”

“Right. Let’s say we wager you buying me one of their cakes,” Ethan suggested.

Yurmus Magic Academy was three hours on foot from Yurmus Town, six hours round trip. By carriage, it was an hour and a half round trip, not counting the cost of renting a horse and carriage, hiring a driver, and enduring the bumpy ride and bruised backside.

“Boen, your friend is sharp, bribing me with cake,” Linav said. “If I claim ‘Ethan Dora Charasen will join the Combat Magic Society’ is true, then to get that cake, I’d have no choice but to let you join, Ethan. But you underestimate me. While that cake is definitely delicious, with its fresh Yurmus ingredients and southern mysteries whipped into a soft batter layered with fruit jams and sugared fruits on top of sweet cream… I can separate work from personal cravings. I’ll just say you can’t join. That will conclude the bet, won’t it?”

“No, I’ll assert that ‘Ethan Dora Charasen will join the Combat Magic Society’ is still a true statement, so the bet stands,” Ethan countered.

“So you’re just going to fail to join and end up buying me a cake?”

“Are you going to accept or not?”

Linav gave Ethan a suspicious look but eventually responded, “Fine. Let’s do it. Then I’ll refuse your membership and you’ll have to buy me a cake.”

“Before we finalize that—ah!” Ethan abruptly turned as the person he’d been looking for entered the workshop. “Professor Rivielton! Good morning!” Ethan said.

“Well, if it isn’t Ethan.” Rivielton Fabier greeted him with a smile. “Have you come to join the Combat Magic Society?”

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