WeTried Translations

Translator: Coughing Baby

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◈ The Inept Mage’s Infinite Regression

Chapter 31

“Puhaha… Ethan Dora Charasen! They say you lifted a rock with your bare hands?” came the mocking voice of Yejoff Asgasil, a tall, blond pretty boy who stood a head taller than Ethan. “Body magic? Are you planning to become a knight?”

Even though Ethan bore the name Dora, few people openly denounced him as an illegitimate child. After all, Ethan was still a member of House Charasen, a ducal family. People might badmouth him behind his back, but if he ever confronted them, they would always offer some excuse—no one dared to sneer right to the face of a Duke’s kin. Asgasil, however, was a member of the royal family of the Yekatan Kingdom. In other words, he was a prince.

Because the Yekatan Kingdom was far from Yurmus, Yejoff had gone home right before the break. Only after he’d returned, when vacation was over, had he heard the story that Ethan had supposedly lifted a stone with his bare hands. Delighted by the rumor, he’d come to make fun of Ethan.

“If you want to become a knight, why don’t you quit the magic academy and apply to be a squire instead?”

Ethan completely ignored Yejoff’s jeers and kept walking down the corridor. It was a short hallway, he only had to endure three or so barbs. Of course, Ethan could simply Save, beat Yejoff to a pulp, and Load again. In fact, he could do so as many times as he wished. The very thought made him feel much more at ease.

<That would be using dark magic for personal reasons,> Demi said.

<I’m not actually going to do it,> Ethan answered. Then, he added, <…But if you’re not going to use dark magic for personal benefit, why learn it at all?>

<Right. It won’t end well for Yejoff, at least.>

Before Ethan disappeared around the corner, Yejoff called after him.

“Oh, sure, lugging a rock around may have gotten you through Basic Magic Practice, but how do you plan on passing Basic Magic Exercises with that cheap trick, hmm?”

He kept on shouting insults, his mocking tone growing louder and louder, but only that last remark stuck in Ethan’s mind. It stung because, in truth, it wasn’t entirely wrong.

∞

Ethan had returned to school after killing all of the Mage Court demons. The only people who knew he had gone through a dangerous fight were Headmaster Aincher Durmus, Rivielton Fabier, and Boen Palmize. Rivielton had found Ethan’s story unbelievable at first, but the headmaster had confirmed it, so he trusted Ethan’s account. From what Ethan could tell, Headmaster Aincher apparently used some sort of magic to verify the many events that happened within the school.

It took less than a day for the Mage Court’s symbolic bat to arrive at Yurmus Magic Academy with a letter. Its contents were simple: Their demons had gone missing. Did the school have any information?

In his reply, Aincher Durmus feigned complete innocence:

Our academy stands beside the Yurmus Forest. In the past, it was once called the Dark Forest, so densely packed it is that people often lose their way within. Many have gone missing there, including students who ignored their professors’ warnings about venturing inside. In fact, we suspect an incident like that happened this year as well.

We saw your demons head into the forest. However, we know not why. They spoke of dark magic and seemed in search of one of our honest students, but I told them politely that I had no right to divulge such information. I heard tell that they threatened our forest wardens, so perhaps they mistakenly believed that student had fled into the woods.

But, in the name of the Yurmus Magic Academy’s honor, we affirm that no student of ours has run off into the forest. The forest wardens, too, acted on incorrect information. None of our students are dark mages, so for what reason would any of them run away?

Before your demons left for the forest, we saw them send a bat to the east. I trust you can discern the facts for yourselves. On behalf of our academy, I am most disappointed that the Empire’s Mage Court attempted to interfere with our institution. Nevertheless, out of moral and humanitarian duty between our two nations, I intend to have the wardens search the forest, in the hopes that they might help locate the missing demons from your Mage Court.

Aincher filled the letter with old-fashioned prose and flowery words, amplifying the length tenfold.

The Mage Court’s terse reply said little more than “Understood.” Clearly, they found the headmaster’s letter exhausting.

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Rivielton concluded that for now, the Mage Court and the Empire would be unable to act further. Losing a contingent of demons was no small blow. If that group had failed, they would have to dispatch an even larger force, which would be a massive diplomatic burden. Declaring an Imperial Inquisition or anti-dark-magic operation was a common stance throughout Damarth Yumaha, but using that as an excuse to bring a sizable armed force into another country was a different story. Invading Yurmus in large numbers would provoke fierce opposition from multiple nations. Even for a powerful state like the Empire, raising tensions so high would be detrimental.

Moreover, they had no evidence that Yurmus Magic Academy was involved in the demons’ disappearance. Aincher’s letter might have contained plenty of exaggerations, but it was also persuasive enough that other nations’ nobles, who sometimes acted as mediators, would trust his word. The Empire’s past use of the Imperial Inquisition as a pretext to deploy force in foreign lands had come back to haunt them.

When Ethan learned that Headmaster Aincher had taken care of the demons’ remains and any trace of the fight, he had to ask about it during a visit to the headmaster’s office.

“Why go this far for me? Being a dark mage is a punishable offense here in Yurmus as well, isn’t it?”

From the Mage Court’s point of view: One student had presumably fled into the forest, and the demons had chased that supposed dark mage and then been wiped out before they could report anything. The Mage Court and the Empire were sure to suspect a dark mage was here—but they had no clue who it might be.

At Aincher’s desk, the headmaster sat with a bonsai pot perched precariously where his head should be. Though the seasons had passed, the little branches remained barren.

Ethan felt an odd urge to water it.

“Then whose sake is it for?”

<Recently, the Mage Council has been more interested in tackling ‘the Empire problem’ than chasing down dark mages. If it’s useful, they’ll happily utilize a dark mage to oppose the Empire. That is the Council’s stance.>

“Does Yurmus Magic Academy speak on behalf of the Mage Council, then?” Ethan asked.

At the mention of a possibly conflicting opinion, Ethan grew more attentive. “How much does the Mage Council know about me?”

“…Then wasn’t this course of action not really the Council’s plan?”

<Huhuhu,> Aincher chuckled softly, his bonsai twigs trembling with his laughter. <Everyone on the Mage Council claims they represent its will. I see no reason I can’t do the same.>

In short, Aincher had helped Ethan of his own volition.

“…Next time I come here, I’ll bring some water.”

<…Pardon?>

But Ethan’s troubles were far from solved.

Just before he left the headmaster’s office, Aincher warned him, <I cannot let rumor spread that you’re a dark mage. If it becomes public, Yurmus Magic Academy—and I as well—will have no choice but to dole out appropriate punishment. Be careful.>

∞

“All right, let’s summarize the situation,” Boen said in the Combat Magic workshop. “…You killed all the demons of the Mage Court. Twenty-one in total, right? Even with dark magic, that’s alarming. A private army from a noble demon house isn’t weak. On a battlefield, a single demon soldier would normally be worth at least five regular troops, maybe even ten, depending on the circumstances. Some say it’s worth sacrificing a cavalry unit just to take out a single demon.”

“Yeah. In a fair fight, I couldn’t even have defeated the weakest among them,” Ethan replied frankly.

“What’s even more surprising is that you killed one of their elders. I might stand a chance against a highborn demon around my own age if luck was on my side, but from what I know, Sirund Zen was over two hundred years old.”

“He didn’t look that old.”

“Most demons don’t age. That’s the reason they chose that form.”

“He was arrogant too.”

Boen shook his head. “They have every right to be arrogant. If some newly titled mage, who got into a magic academy on family connections, were strutting around full of himself, you could argue he deserves a swift end. But Sirund’s hubris was the kind that’s… earned. Frankly, from what you told me, he almost sounds humble by demon standards. He died because, unfortunately for him, he showed you an opening.”

Ethan nodded. “Thanks for the compliment.”

Boen adjusted his glasses.

“That wasn’t a compliment, Ethan. Not really. I overheard Prince Yejoff mocking you earlier. His attitude was unfair, and to be honest, it tarnishes the honor of House Asgasil, yet he isn’t entirely wrong about one thing…” He pointed at Ethan. “At this rate, you won’t pass Basic Magic Exercises. You’ll fail out of Yurmus Magic Academy.”

“…Ugh.”

“You talk about challenging the Emperor? You can’t do it alone. No matter how many demons you killed, that doesn’t mean you have real power. The Emperor is Cario Arnesia, who slew the Demon King single-handedly back in his hero days. If you want to accomplish anything, you need to form connections and learn from the resources here at Yurmus Magic Academy. If you are expelled, what will you have left? You’ll just be some dropout who couldn’t even finish Magic Academy.”

Under his breath, Ethan muttered, “…What happened to the kindness you promised in our contract?”

With a hearty slap on Ethan’s shoulder, Boen said, “This is my kindness, Ethan.”

Avoiding Boen’s gaze, Ethan brought up a minimized window in his field of vision.

“I guess this is all I can rely on.”

[Quest completed!]

[Quest: Defeat Sirund Zen (B)]

[Reward: 480 experience points]

[Reward: B-rank Lottery Coupon]

With the desperation of a gambler putting his last coins on the table, Ethan clung to the hope that whatever he drew from the B-rank Lottery Coupon would solve all his problems.

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