WeTried Translations

Translator: Coughing Baby

Editor: Coughing Baby

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◈ The Inept Mage’s Infinite Regression

Chapter 80

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Boen blinked at the great raven a few times, then said to Ethan, "Do you happen to know that great raven?"

"That is the first time anyone has ever asked me that in my life."

"It's the first time I've asked it too. But that great raven knows your name, Ethan."

Ethan said to the great raven, "Do you know me?"

"I know."

"How?"

"Caw! Charasen! The Upper Realm of great ravens!"

The Upper Realm meant a paradise one could reach by touching truth. But the mages of the present age saw it as a ridiculous idea. To ordinary people with nothing to do with magic, it was more like a byword for some distant paradise. In that sense, Charasen really could be called the Upper Realm of great ravens. In Charasen, great ravens were seen as good omens, so even ones not raised in the castle were given food, and their natural predators were driven away. If someone hurt a great raven even by accident, they had to pay a fine.

The great raven kept talking. "In Charasen, great ravens gather and talk. Charasen rumors, great ravens talk among ourselves."

"What kind of things do you talk about?"

"Who gives biggest food. The best. Duke of Charasen. Finest. King. Emperor."

"Don't say that where people can hear you. My father could get arrested for treason."

"But above that, legend. Myth. God. Exists."

"Who?"

"Ethan!"

Before Ethan noticed, Renzo and Robita had already come over beside Boen to listen. Ethan got up, meaning to catch the great raven, but it bounced away.

"Ethan! Hero of great ravens! Toppled a grain warehouse for great ravens!"

"Is that true?"

Ethan chased the great raven and looked back at Boen. "It was an accident. One great raven talked me into helping with something, and it looked fun, so I did. It asked me to bring fire, but it turned out that great raven had explosives from who knows where. I set off the explosives with the fire I brought, and the warehouse wall collapsed, with grain pouring out like a waterfall. Every great raven in Charasen probably showed up that day. Some ate so much they couldn't fly and just waddled away."

"...You were a troublemaker, huh?"

"It's not my fault! I was only this big back then."

Ethan tapped his hand against his thigh.

"Ever since then, whenever great ravens see me, they tease me. This one must have heard the story somewhere too."

The great raven, still darting around, looked back and said, "Not teasing! Praise! Praise!"

"Shut up."

Ethan caught the great raven with both hands and held it so they were face to face.

"So, what do you want?"

"I will buy!"

It was strange enough that an animal wanted to buy something, but he had to ask.

"What are you buying?"

For something with wings, the great raven had unusual greed.

"Land!"

∞

The great raven's name was Mumu. Usually, spirit beasts played the role of local masters and looked after other animals. Mumu also seemed to have a rough territory, though to humans its borders were not very clear.

"I am forest master. But humans do not acknowledge. Angry! Annoyed!"

Mumu climbed onto Ethan's wrist and puffed up his feathers, so Ethan scratched under his beak to calm him.

"But humans probably do not steal what great ravens eat, do they?"

"They steal! My hawthorn berries! Take all!"

"You also peck up spilled wheat grains in fields."

"That is humans offering tribute out of respect for me."

"Mm, sure."

Mumu lifted his head proudly for a moment, then, as if he remembered he had been angry, puffed his feathers again.

"But not only that. Humans. Burn my forest. Big problem! Worried!"

"They're burning the forest?"

"Not a lie."

Robita cut in. "Looks like they are doing slash-and-burn farming around here."

Mumu said, "I warned humans to stop! But they do not listen. Humans are fools. Even if I speak, they do not understand."

"They probably ignored you. So what then?"

"I decided to do it in human way. I am forest master. But not acknowledged. Humans prove land ownership with documents. I also will get that paper. To get it, must buy. But I do not know method. Charasen knows paper well. Many papers. Ethan is Charasen too. Ethan knows."

Ethan asked with interest, "Who told you that?"

"Passing clown."

A passing clown was someone who wore ridiculous makeup, went on stage, and made people laugh. Most belonged to troupes, but wanderers existed too.

Watching from the side, Boen said, "You handle him pretty well for someone you dislike."

"...It's just habit."

Ethan turned to Robita and Renzo. "What do you think?"

Robita answered, "He's very cute."

"Not a headache?"

Renzo said, "...Mm, sorry to say this in front of him. But do you really have any duty to help Mumu? Charasen and this place are very far apart. If this were between people, you'd be complete strangers."

"That's true, but birds have an information network, just like this one knows rumors about me. If I ignore him and leave, bad rumors about me will spread, and since they'd be based on truth, that would affect my family's reputation too."

"Isn't that the family you're leaving? You don't look very loyal to it."

Ethan checked the quest window that appeared before his eyes.

[Quest triggered!]
[Quest: Help Mumu (C)]
[This great raven seems to be in trouble. Can you help?]

Ethan shrugged. "It's an honor issue."

Boen said, "If we head to the fork up ahead, there's a village. We've been riding hard, so I think it's fine to spend one night resting and regrouping. During that time, Robita can rest, and Ethan can try to handle this as much as possible. If it's still not solved by tomorrow, then it can't be helped."

Robita, already exhausted, agreed to Boen's compromise, and Renzo also thought taking a detour through the village was not a bad idea.

Ethan sighed and said to Mumu, "I say this with absolutely no expectations, but do you have money?"

"Money?"

"Copper coins, silver coins, gold coins. You know what 'buy' means, right? To buy land..."

"I have."

Mumu said, "I have lots of money."

∞

Ethan's party followed Mumu across the forest. There were too many trees to ride horses easily, but there was not much underbrush, so walking was fine. Renzo said they should keep going since they were headed toward the village anyway.

What they reached was a low bell tower. It had been built by stacking stone, but it must not have been used in a long time, with vines climbing the walls and moss thick in the shaded spots. They climbed the steps and found piles of junk in a corner.

But when they opened a small box, it was packed with gold and silver coins. Ethan sorted them with clinking sounds.

"...Six Imperial gold coins, twelve southern gold coins, and around two hundred silver coins. There are about as many copper coins too."

Renzo muttered, "...That's more than my entire fortune."

Ethan asked Mumu, "Where did all this come from?"

"Picked up. Humans have bad eyes. They drop things. If dropped, mine. Shiny. Pretty."

Mumu tilted his head this way and that and bounced side to side to watch the sparkle of the coins.

"Even so, that's too much."

"Took long time. My whole life."

Looking at Mumu again, Ethan noticed its beak had darkened, and its wing feathers were faded and had grown unevenly. Ethan knew great ravens had lifespans similar to humans.

Leaving Mumu alone, Ethan quietly said to Robita, "Can he buy land?"

"...Not even close."

Ethan nodded.

Mumu had enough money to open his own shop in a city right away, but buying land was a different concept. Becoming the full owner of land meant becoming a lord, in other words a noble, and that was not easy even for humans. Even merchants who piled up wealth could not become nobles that way.

Also, even if land-use rights were traded under a lord's approval, this amount could not buy much land, and approval would likely not come. Slash-and-burn settlers cultivated land and could be taxed on it. Allowing them to use land increased the number of taxable people for the lord, and land cultivated by slash-and-burn settlers could later grow into a small village. If future value was included, land they would clear should cost even more than that.

Ethan had expected this already. Even spirit beasts usually could not match human intelligence and wisdom, and they could not fully understand human concepts and culture. In cases like this, the best option was to play along to a point and find a compromise. If there was one fortunate thing, it was that even if this did not end in a full solution, Ethan's honor would not be damaged. Honor depended on will, not ability.

Ethan took Mumu and found the slash-and-burn village's headman, who also served as steward. But the result was not good. The steward already knew Mumu. Just as Mumu said, they had clashed several times. Ethan tried to phrase things politely, but the steward mocked Ethan and even threatened Mumu.

"If you don't get out of the forest right now, I'll turn you into skewers like that friend of yours."

After hearing that threat, Ethan did not even show how much money he had. If they learned how much money Mumu had, they would try to kill him immediately.

On the way back, Ethan patted Mumu on the head as he trudged along in defeat.

"Mm, sorry. I hoped he'd be someone we could talk to."

"It's okay. Ethan is kind. Helps me. But sad. As sad as when nest burned. My eggs! Friends!"

Mumu cried caw caw in a very low voice.

Still, that mood did not last long. Once they met the party again, Mumu said he would show them a good campsite. Even though the group generally looked unhappy about anything related to the slash-and-burn village, they went along with it to match Mumu's mood.

The campsite was a hill overlooking the forest, and just as Mumu said, it was a good spot. It was wide, and the paths leading up were narrow, making it easy to guard. It was also not far from the slash-and-burn village. On top of that, Mumu brought a nightjar, saying a friend would take over night watch. The group argued about whether that could be trusted, but after Renzo tested the nightjar himself, he decided it could. When Renzo came up the hill, the nightjar cried out chok-dok-dok-dok.

After saying goodbye to Mumu, the group lit a campfire and fell asleep.

Then, in the middle of the night, someone woke Ethan.

"Ethan. Get up."

"...Mumu?"

Ethan saw the sky above the horizon glowing reddish and thought morning was approaching. He rubbed his heavy eyes and said, "What is it?"

"I made mistake. Fire bigger than expected."

"...Fire?"

Ethan looked back toward the horizon. It was not one red point. Everything was red. The forest was burning.

"Get up. Fire fast. Wake friends. Run."

Ethan stood there, still not fully awake. His mind was dull not just because he had been asleep, but because of the thick black smoke covering the sky.

From the hill, they could see the slash-and-burn village below. The flames had already reached close to it, and people were rushing around. Some, maybe not realizing how huge the fire was, were scooping water into wooden buckets and throwing it on rooftops to put the flames out. Shouting and screams carried over.

Ethan snapped fully awake.

"Wait, you said it was a mistake?"

"Yes. Mistake."

"You set this fire?"

"Yes."

"...Why?"

Mumu circled over Ethan's head as he spoke.

"I gave chance. Humans are bad. If talk does not work. Next is war."

Ethan asked, "How did you do it?"

"Thanks for fire."

Ethan looked into the campfire and pressed a hand to his forehead.

"You came up with that?"

"No, passing clown taught me."

"...What the hell."

As if it thought there was no need for more talk, Mumu flew up.

[Quest triggered!]
[Quest: Kill Mumu (C)]
[This great raven has now done something it can neither take responsibility for nor undo. That means it is no longer a spirit beast, but a demonic beast.]

Mumu rose high into the sky and cawed in joy.

"For fire, fire! For death, death!"

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