The Police Do a Better Job than Heroes - Chapter 33

WeTried Translations

Translator/Editor: ZERO_SUGAR

Discord: https://dsc.gg/wetried

◈ The Police Do a Better Job Than Heroes

Chapter 33

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Staying Still Gets You Halfway There (7)

"First, I focused on the culprit's intent. And ultimately, the core of this case is the smoke grenade can."

Kang Jin-ho held up the smoke grenade can Eun-yeong had picked up earlier, showing it to everyone present.

"The culprit couldn't have expected to stall for very long with this smoke grenade. Not with a B-rank hero standing guard. Dragging things out for several minutes just doesn't make sense."

That single line was the thread running through the whole case. The window they'd had was only fifty seconds. Fifty seconds might sound long, but it was nowhere near enough time for anything elaborate.

"So it's reasonable to assume the culprit stole the bag using a simple action, something that could be done in that short a window. Does everyone agree?"

"Yeah, I agree."

"..."

At Kang Jin-ho's question, only Eun-yeong nodded along eagerly, while Hwa-yeong stood off to the side with a sour look. The staff who'd been searching for the bags just watched in silence, clearly wondering what this cop thought he was doing.

"Ahem."

Kang Jin-ho cleared his throat at the awkward silence, then picked the explanation back up.

"There's another condition in this case. Hwa-yeong-nim climbed the streetlamp and scanned the crowd."

"There, uh, wasn't anyone running off with a bag. I can recognize the merchandise they sell here."

Hwa-yeong added the detail. Given that blending into the crowd was the easiest way for a bag thief to escape, this was a fairly useful piece of information.

So, to summarize the case.

First. The culprit stole the bag within the fifty seconds the smoke grenade lasted.

Second. The culprit did not leave the smoke with the bag in hand.

"Hm... went underground? Seems possible if it's someone with a phasing ability."

Eun-yeong tilted her head, but Kang Jin-ho shook his head instead.

"Maybe somewhere else, but this is a busy commercial district. There's too much infrastructure underground for a phaser to navigate easily, and there's no good spot to drop the phasing. The moment they reappeared near people or CCTV, they'd be caught instantly."

"That's true."

Phasing wasn't the same as turning invisible. Even after grabbing the luxury bag, the thief would eventually need to drop the ability somewhere, and there was no spot nearby where that wouldn't get noticed.

"...so, what are you trying to say? What happened to the bags?"

Hwa-yeong snapped, still keeping Clayboy trapped inside the ring of fire, his tone sour.

Kang Jin-ho answered with a small grin.

"What I think is..."

"Think is what?"

"Nothing happened to the bags."

"..."

"What kind of wordplay is that supposed to be?"

"The bags are still here. That's my answer."

"..."

Hearing Kang Jin-ho's words, the staff who'd been searching for the bags, Hwa-yeong who'd been sneering the whole time, and the citizens filming from a distance on their phones, all of them went blank for a moment.

"The bags... are here?"

"Yes."

"Where? Huh? Where exactly are they?"

Hwa-yeong slapped the teddy bear platform where the luxury bags had originally been displayed, again and again. Kang Jin-ho nodded calmly right after.

"Yes, they're right there."

"...what?"

"I thought about it. Is there a way to fool a B-rank hero's eyes and steal a bag within a mere fifty seconds? I concluded there wasn't."

"...but the bags actually disappeared!"

Hwa-yeong dropped the formal speech entirely now, just shouting.

"No, no. Stealing and hiding are different things. I thought the culprit hid the bags."

"...!"

Thinking it through, that tracked.

Stealing something in Light City, especially at an event this large, wasn't easy. This was one of the busiest commercial districts on the outskirts of Light City. CCTV was everywhere, and plenty of information-type heroes could be dispatched at a moment's notice.

"Getting your hands on it is one thing. But is it realistic to actually escape with the bag afterward? Multiple capable heroes would chase you down, and shaking that off would require an unusually strong ability."

But that raised its own contradiction. Why would someone with that kind of power bother stealing just ten luxury bags? Add them all up and you got maybe a hundred million won. Someone that strong would go after something far rarer and more valuable.

"So I changed the direction of my thinking. What if stealing wasn't the goal? What if there was never any intention to steal in the first place? That narrows the possibilities considerably."

"..."

"So I worked from the assumption that the culprit's goal was to 'hide the bags.'"

If the goal was hiding rather than stealing, fifty seconds became far more generous. Stealing required an escape route. Hiding required no such thing, since there was nothing left to plan for afterward.

"Now, the staff member showed us something earlier."

Kang Jin-ho walked back to the bear platform and pressed the small latch, just as the staff member had done before.

With a clack, part of the platform swung open, revealing the hollow space inside.

Kang Jin-ho leaned his upper body into the space and rummaged around for a moment.

Thunk.

He pulled something out and set it on top of the platform.

"Here's the bag."

He pointed at what looked like empty air, holding out his palm as if to say, look closer.

A staff member stepped forward hesitantly and reached out to feel the empty space.

"...there's really a bag here?"

Invisible to the eye, but real under the staff member's fingers.

"The trick was an invisibility ability."

Kang Jin-ho crossed his arms and continued explaining.

"Escaping with a bag within fifty seconds is impossible. But stuffing a bag into this compartment within fifty seconds? That's completely doable."

The culprit set off the smoke grenade, then immediately went for the bear platform. Unable to see clearly, they must have felt around to find the latch, opened it, and shoved the bag inside. Moving a bag while blind meant the culprit had to know this location intimately. Almost certainly a popup staff member, or someone who worked nearby.

Of course, simply stuffing the bag in wouldn't be enough to avoid detection.

"They must have used an ability. Probably something that turns whatever they touch invisible, and the duration likely isn't very long. Should be running out about now, don't you think?"

The moment Kang Jin-ho finished speaking, a bag suddenly appeared on the platform. Or more accurately, an already-invisible bag had simply become visible again.

"When the staff member opened the compartment to show us earlier, I noticed something like a white residue on the inner wall. Probably smoke grenade pigment. Which means that compartment had been opened at least once after the grenade went off."

"...that's what tipped you off?"

Eun-yeong clapped her hands together, thoroughly impressed.

Why would anyone bother opening that empty compartment in the middle of the chaos from a smoke grenade? Why open it specifically when the smoke went off? Kang Jin-ho had clearly started his reasoning from that exact question.

"Yes. Which is why nobody could find the bags no matter how hard they searched. Who would ever think to feel around inside the empty space under the platform? There was nothing visible there to begin with."

"...why would anyone even bother doing something like that?"

Hwa-yeong cut in, jaw clenched.

"There's no reason to pull something like that. The duration's only about ten minutes, so they'd get caught for sure. There's no way to escape. You're telling me someone just felt like messing around and suddenly set off a smoke grenade to hide the bags? Just to screw with me?"

"Precisely."

"...what?"

"The culprit clearly knew your personality in advance, Hwa-yeong. They must have predicted that the moment the bags went missing, you'd panic about damage control and start forcing your way through something, anything."

"..."

"So their goal wasn't stealing the bags. It was creating chaos at this popup store you were guarding, and..."

Kang Jin-ho glanced around at the citizens filming with their phones.

"...tanking your reputation as badly as possible. That's what I think."

That was exactly it.

Every bit of Hwa-yeong's disgraceful behavior had been recorded. From arresting an innocent villain to talking down to Kang Jin-ho with disrespect. Hwa-yeong's reputation had already been shaky, but this went well past anything that could be smoothed over.

"And apparently you weren't even on site when the incident happened. You were off drinking coffee, which means you also violated your contract as the security lead."

"...I was... the target?"

Hwa-yeong's arms dropped limply. From the group of staff standing off at a distance, a woman stepped forward with steady strides.

"That officer's right. I'm the culprit. I got the smoke grenade off the black market and set it off here today. And yes, I hid the bags using an invisibility ability."

"Why... why would you do something like that? Why?!"

Hwa-yeong lunged toward the woman, then barely stopped himself, remembering how many cameras were pointed his way. He glared at her instead, eyes bloodshot.

"What exactly did I ever do to you? Huh? Did I kill your fucking parents or something?"

"Yeah."

"...what?"

"When you fought the 3-rank villain Blacksoot. Remember? You burned down dozens of houses in the area."

"...but there was an evacuation order."

Hwa-yeong's booming voice grew smaller and smaller. The woman's voice, meanwhile, only grew louder.

"Yeah. But my parents had trouble walking, and they couldn't get out in time. And you, trying to catch a villain, just torched the whole neighborhood without a second thought. An evacuation order? You turned it into a sea of fire in five minutes and you think that's an excuse? And then in the interview afterward, you said it couldn't be helped?"

The woman's voice rang out, veins standing out on her neck as she shouted.

"That was... even the association recognized it as legitimate self-defense..."

"So I did this. To end your little reputation, right here."

"..."

Hwa-yeong's mouth opened and closed, but no more excuses came out.

The wide commercial street. Hundreds of people gathered, but not a single one spoke.

Only the cold click of camera shutters echoed through the silence.

The cleanup went smoothly after that.

"I did it. I'll come quietly."

The woman gave up all resistance and let the police take her in. Her revenge had already succeeded, after all.

The bags, at least, were still intact and back in their place, which was some relief, though a few had been stained by the smoke grenade's white pigment and lost their resale value. The staff groaned over the cleanup work ahead, but privately felt grateful the incident had ended this cleanly.

"..."

Hwa-yeong's situation, on the other hand, was close to hell.

The disgraceful conduct at the scene had already flooded social media and every community board, and the Hero Association, rattled by the furious public reaction, immediately announced heavy disciplinary action and an investigation. For all practical purposes, Hwa-yeong was on the way out of the industry.

Once Hwa-yeong headed back to the Hero Association and the woman was taken into custody, the crowd that had gathered began to disperse, one group at a time, under the control of officers from another precinct.

"This is exactly why I hate heroes."

Eun-yeong drifted over, smiling.

"Their insides never match their outsides. They go around talking about protecting people and whatnot, but really, most of them just want to make money, get famous, and get stronger."

"Agreed."

"Yeah. Nice work on the deduction today, Jin-ho."

She said that, then reached over and idly massaged the back of Kang Jin-ho's neck.

"Though, I think you already knew who the culprit was pretty early on. Why didn't you just say so right away?"

"Ah, well..."

"Let's just say it right away next time. Honestly, I was a little bored in the middle there."

"Understood."

After hearing Eun-yeong's review, Clayboy, who'd been watching from a slight distance and reading the room, shuffled over hesitantly.

"You worked hard out there!"

"Ah, it was nothing."

"I was really upset, you know. I'm trying to live an honest life here, and then out of nowhere some lunatic points at me and says I'm the culprit..."

Clayboy bowed repeatedly, clearly relieved beyond words.