WeTried Translations
Translator: Coughing Baby
Editor: Coughing Baby
Discord: https://dsc.gg/wetried
◈ The Reluctant Imperialist
Chapter 5
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Did I Ever Have a Grand Ambition?
As an Imperial man in his twenties from a good house, it was only natural I almost ended up with a fiancée. Our families had pushed the marriage talks pretty hard too. But she and I were a mismatch in every way. Honestly, she was not the type who would work out with any man.
“How was it? Your first kill.”
Her name was Ezel. She had sharp, catlike features and ash-gray hair in her house’s signature color. She was the eldest daughter of House Runselot, a family on par with Ebenholtz.
“Hard to say. I don’t really know.”
I had liked her once. She had said she “could like” me too.
You could trust that. Ezel herself had said it.
But we were headed down different roads.
“By the way, Max. Do you really want to marry me?”
Ezel asked, sounding tired of it already. I let out a faint laugh.
She had been like this back then too. I used to hang on every word she said and stay on edge, but not anymore.
“You don’t want it?”
“Of course not. You don’t even feel like a man. You’re too soft. And your hair, what is that? It’s too long. Cut it short.”
Ezel was Imperial, but the weight in her heart had already tipped toward revolution.
Which meant she was a good person.
I asked her back.
“How was it, my kill?”
“......Well. I don’t know.”
Back then I thought Ezel was impossible to read. I thought it was just the usual push and pull.
My experience had been that shallow.
“I did wonder if you really had to kill him...... but in the end he was Ain species, so maybe I get it?”
Now, her trembling voice showed what she had really meant.
“Ezel, the truth is.”
I leaned toward her and whispered the truth.
“He turned into a monster first and tried to kill me. All Izenheim are monsters.”
“......Huh?”
Ezel’s face went blank.
Probably everyone else in the world would make that same face. Unless you were a completely deranged racist, that was not something you could agree with.
I raised a brow.
“Joking.”
“Wow...... hey, you should see a doctor.”
“I said I’m joking. I killed him because I was pissed he tricked me.”
“You should see a doctor for that too. Anger management issue.”
“......”
The words anger management issue brushed against my heart. My pulse kicked hard for a moment.
I picked up my knife.
“It wasn’t anger management.”
Rage surged from the bottom of my chest. Days from the distant future flashed by like a stampede.
The Empire had already fallen, Father had been beheaded and his head hung on the central avenue of the capital for months, you had become a core figure in the revolutionary army and formed the council, all while I kept fleeing like a madman, then I was caught and locked in prison for decades though it felt like only a few years, I watched Edmund grow old in real time, and in the end I saw the world being destroyed......
“......It was just.”
Even if I told you all that, you would never believe me.
Honestly, I would not have believed it either if not for the virus inside me.
So no one could understand my heart. I should not even expect them to.
“Just eat your food.”
I pointed my knife at her plate. Ezel gave me a sly smile.
“Ah, you’re so transparent. The second I said I liked macho types, you switched right away?”
“Before I punch your mouth in.”
Ezel laughed softly and focused on her food.
If we actually fought, I would lose every single time. Even so, she had never shown off or rubbed it in, not once in her life. Probably because she knew my inferiority complex.
Ezel had always been a good friend who could never quite stop herself from letting me have my way.
When the Empire fell, Ezel was the one who let me go as I ran.
Ezel was probably the one who kept me alive in that underground prison too.
If it had not been for you, I would not even have gotten a chance to regress.
So.
“I’ll pay today.”
“......Seriously? You’re being that transparent?”
“Then you pay.”
“I’ll enjoy it~”
As she cut up her steak with her knife, I added in an indifferent tone.
This was today’s real point.
“Let’s not get married. I’ll tell the families that too.”
Ezel’s hand trembled slightly, then she looked at me with steady eyes.
“Yeah. I think that’s right for us.”
I think that’s right for us.
Only now did I understand what your words had meant, words you had said back then too.
* * *
After I got home, I dragged myself in and threw off my clothes. I tossed the cumbersome suit pieces aside and stood in the bathroom. I looked at myself in the mirror.
In the end, everything came down to strength.
Today made that even clearer, thanks to Ezel.
I had to grow stronger. Body and mind.
Edmund had said, “If it had been the Empire, humanity would have lasted longer.”
That was because the Empire did not ask for understanding. The Empire was iron-blood itself.
Even with rot eating it from the inside, the Empire’s joints and glue were stronger than any foreign enemy on the continent. It crushed its own insides and turned into a weapon to break the outside. The Empire had been a chimera golem built for that from the start. I had been born near the top of the pyramid that made up such an Empire. Ebenholtz stood at that height.
As an Imperial, if I had to exterminate one race, I was in a position where I could do it.
Justification overflowed.
“To stop the end of the world.”
An ending only I knew. A perfect purpose, like something out of a hero’s tale.
To do that, I had to get stronger.
But was I ready?
I had been weak in the Empire’s final years, afraid while it tilted toward collapse, and always running after it fell.
Was I ready?
“I’m asking, Maximilian.”
I asked the man in the mirror.
“Are you ready?”
If I was ready.
Then it was time to change.
* * *
From morning on, I ran laps. I ran until I could spit blood, trying to persuade the virus inside me. I was persuading it to help me.
This helps you too. If I die, you die.
Maybe I had run around twenty laps.
“......Engi?”
Engi was standing at the starting point. He smiled brightly and held out a towel to me.
“What is it?”
“The house head says he will give you a gift. He said you finally did something worthy of an Imperial.”
House Head Sebestian. He was my father, but calling him father still felt awkward.
He praised me for killing a fifteen-year-old cadet.
“What gift?”
“He said he will tell you directly. He says he will give you whatever you want.”
“......Figures.”
That rigid middle-aged man loved judging people. He judged everything I did however he pleased, set endlessly high standards, and crushed me with them.
This time, what I wanted was clear.
“A swordsmanship instructor.”
“Swordsmanship...... but Ebenholtz is a house famous for sword arts?”
“I don’t think their style fits me.”
Ebenholtz’s base was longsword style. I did not use longsword style.
The complete opposite fit me better, holding a light sword in one hand.
In many ways, Ebenholtz was a house that did not suit me.
“Father doesn’t follow strict orthodoxy either, right? And please cover for the three friends who are left.”
The three cadets left after I killed Jacob. I only remembered Hanna’s name, but I wanted their futures not to be ruined.
The Empire had fallen because it was too cruel.
“If possible, I want them to face no penalties.”
“Why?”
Engi’s tone sharpened. I had already prepared the answer. Engi was a loyal Imperial too.
“People show openings when they’re comfortable. If you bind them too tightly, even if they’re turncoats or Ain species, they won’t reveal themselves.”
Maybe my reasoning sounded logical enough, because Engi smiled.
“Yes. I will do that. Then please rest well.”
“Yeah. Thanks.”
Engi bowed his head and left. Even his footsteps as a butler were perfectly neat.
“Phew.”
I let out a sigh of relief.
“......I got lucky.”
Jacob Mack. Thank god my opponent had been sloppy. If he had been even a little stronger, I would have been the one done for.
Don’t forget.
Izenheim are strong.
And right now, I am weak.
So they must never find out that I know them, or that I can decipher their language.
Humanity’s enemy is Izenheim. Knowing only that is enough.
The worst and the second worst.
The worst would be the end of the world, and the second worst would be the Empire surviving.
“The Empire was right. The Empire defined them as demonic mutants and isolated them completely. We...... we treated them as people to liberate and protect.”
Edmund, far in the future, regretted not choosing the second worst.
I decided to trust his regret.
I had gained a grand ambition too.
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