WeTried Translations
Translator: Goku
Editor: Sty
Discord: https://dsc.gg/wetried
◈ The War Hero in the NTR Game Wants to Die ◈
Chapter 027
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Void (1)
I looked down at Arin, whose fingertips were trembling.
I know that there was no need to go this far.
I know it with my head, though.
Still, as I cut down this child, I feel as if something inside me was cut away with her.
Like that bastard who hung me from the ceiling.
Finally, I feel like I've escaped from 'Riehen'.
Every time I died, it felt like the leash I always wore was growing heavier.
Every time I died, memories surged, and every time memories surged, Riehen's emotions rooted themselves within me.
Because Riehen's memories always lingered in my mind, and Riehen's dreams lingered in my heart… my head had started to become filled with them.
The noose that wouldn't come loose even if I died, that had bound me since the day I opened my eyes in this place, seems to have finally loosened only after I cut down Arin.
Riehen had always overlaid his dreams onto me.
I killed Arin to get rid of the remaining dreams.
Only connections leading back to Riehen were abundant.
Even ill-fated connections are connections.
To sever the ties Riehen had left for me throughout his life, there was no other way but this.
Riehen had women.
Well, since he's the protagonist, it's natural, I suppose, but since I pushed them away so they couldn't cling to me and I came to the capital, there's no one left to be connected to now.
Arin was the light remaining in Riehen's heart.
Because Riehen's reason for living was Arin.
So I erased it.
This fucking bastard, after passing everything on to me and dying, left behind such trash.
Now that Arin is dead too, there's nothing left.
I pressed my eyes firmly.
Shaking off the blood on the sword, I put it back into its scabbard.
"I managed to do it."
But… perhaps there was no need to go this far.
There was no need to kill her so cruelly.
If I had just stayed still as I was, it felt like I would be devoured by Riehen.
The way of thinking, the way of remembering someone, even my heart felt like it would be devoured by Riehen, so I cut it away, didn't I?
Just… that girl who was desperately trying to survive, you know.
What's different about me from the family head, Rione, or Roseline, whom I found so disgusting?
I suppose I can recall this thought too, now that I've cut off Riehen.
Because it's only after you're full that you start being picky about food.
Perhaps I'm having an absurd dog dream. I wish it were, but I'm not waking up from this dream.
Arin was still breathing out short, difficult gasps.
Even though her wounds are quite deep, she's still surviving, you know.
Should I call her tenacious, or is it just not her time to die yet?
Every time she inhaled, a sound of foam bubbling in her throat was heard.
That sound was erasing the silence in the room.
As I looked down, I took out a cigarette and stuck it in my mouth.
My hands are no longer trembling.
However, the match was soaked in blood and wouldn't light.
Once, twice. The wet matchstick only scratched, but no spark caught.
On the third try, I threw the entire matchbox onto the floor and left the room with the unlit cigarette in my mouth.
I went down the stairs.
The wood creaked under my shoes.
With each step down, the smell from the second floor faded, and the smell from the first floor rose.
The acidic smoke of cheap liquor and oil lamps, and the smell of damp wooden floors.
It was the same smell I had noticed when I came up, but now it strangely felt like the air of another world.
I didn't care whether the guys drinking looked at me or not.
Slowly, I descended the stairs and sat at the counter.
"Some liquor. Make it a strong one."
The bartender had a different expression than before.
With trembling hands, he took out a glass, poured liquor, and pushed it across the counter.
When the glass was placed on the wood, a rattling, trembling sound was heard.
It was the sound of the bartender's hands trembling.
With the cigarette in my mouth, I gestured towards the bartender with my chin.
The bartender, with trembling hands, brought a match and lit it for me.
I inhaled the smoke.
After filling my lungs, I slowly exhaled.
The smoke spread across the counter as if crawling, then hit the light of the oil lamp and dispersed.
And I drained the liquor the bartender had given me.
The sensation of it flowing down my esophagus was the same as before.
The same liquor I had drunk before coming upstairs, the same glass, the same counter.
Nothing had changed.
Only Riehen had disappeared.
I set down the glass.
A round wet ring remained on the counter.
Then, a window softly appeared in the air.
Unlike usual, it rose slowly, one character at a time.
Had Arin finally died?
[BAD ENDING NO. 4 : A Futile Dream]
[The girl who came to the capital carrying a dream in her heart ended up losing everything to the very dream she had longed for so dearly, after slowly devouring that dream herself.]
[Would you like to start again?]
[Yes] [No]
I pressed no without hesitation.
But why, why doesn't it end?
I couldn't know.
Does this mean it's not just about seeing the ending?
Right now, everything was overwhelmingly tedious.
I don't want to care about anything.
Like when the war ended and I holed myself up in the mansion, drinking until Rione smashed my head.
I'll just indulge in a bit of self-pity for a day, then shake it off.
Because I'll escape this world.
Because I'll die somehow.
Somehow, somehow…….
Since I've escaped the front lines too, I'll probably be able to escape this place soon too.
If I die again and again, if I do something or other.
What do you mean escape? I'm still on the front lines.
Other than killing someone, I can't even think of a solution.
There was no need to… kill, was there?
If I'm not 'Riehen', there was even less need to kill.
Because we were nothing to each other.
My body has escaped the front lines, but my mind is still there.
Other than killing someone, there's nothing I can do anymore.
Because I can't even think of anything else.
Even if it wasn't Arin right now… I could have spared at least the adventurers who had lost their will to fight and dropped their weapons.
It's just that… this space, this world, is corroding me.
If you stay in a fucked-up place like this, your head is bound to go crazy.
Anyway, perhaps later I should call Adelaide separately, take her to bed and have sex, and then just have a wedding, wouldn't that be fine?
She's my fiancée, so I guess that much is allowed.
If she dies… that would be regrettable in its own way.
If I can just escape from here, what can't I do?
If a quest comes down and the reward is to send me out of this place, I would peel my own skin off with a knife if told to.
And for some reason, Roseline or Rione felt physiologically repulsive.
They're just… fucking humans themselves, disgusting, fucking bitches.
They don't see me as me, but as a toy they want to manipulate to their liking, and I don't want to cling to such things.
Riding in a carriage, I returned to the house Adelaide had provided.
The coachman and the servants in the mansion seemed surprised by my blood-soaked clothes, but didn't speak.
The servants, as I told them, heated water for the bath without a word and quietly retreated.
After the servants had retreated, still dressed, holding a dagger, I entered the bathtub.
As I soaked in the water, the blood on my clothes began to disperse in the water.
The red slowly spread in the water and soon lightly dyed the entire water.
How I killed enemies on the battlefield, or how many I killed… that didn't matter.
But today it's not like that, is it?
It's a terrible thing.
It's funny to think of it now, but.
So, when I was actually wielding the sword, I couldn't even think about what was wrong, but it's only by reflecting like this that… fuck, only then.
If it continues like this, I'll end up killing everyone someday.
Whoever it is, if I think they're a heroine, I'll just kill them all.
Staring blankly at my wrist, I vaguely stirred the water with the dagger without any meaning, then lightly swung it.
To kill the disgusting murderer.
To put down the psychopath who still hasn't escaped the battlefield.
I submerged my body completely in the water.
Along with the feeling of my body losing strength, I started to feel sleepy.
『Riehen, when you're sad, try pretending to be happy. Hehehe, it looks like you didn't quite grasp what I meant. It's just... even if you're sad, if you keep a smile on your face, you'll feel a little better. Your father wouldn't have been so cruel to you out of malice. After all, Riehen, there's no way you're useless. To me, you're a treasure more precious than anyone else in the world. You were born to be loved, you know? And pretending to be happy isn't that hard. You ask why I'm telling you this? Because when Mom isn't around, when there's no one to comfort you, just pretending to be happy will make things a little better. Someday, when my son grows up... will he understand what his mother is saying?』
[Synchronization Rate Increased? 0.1% ?]
Lying in the bathtub, like a clown from a movie, I put my fingers in my mouth and forced the corners of my lips upwards.
Well.
Is it because I'm not Riehen that my mood isn't getting better, Mother?
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