WETRIED TRANSLATIONS

The Wizard in the Poncho

[Translator – Aren]

Chapter 25 - The Man Who Aspires to Be a Wizard

Sometimes, when faced with trials and hardships too cruel to bear, people would turn to God.

Even I, Baek Jemin, the kind of guy who seemed to live however he pleased, believing himself unrivaled under the heavens, once got dragged off to a shaman by my parents. It’s only natural to run around chasing the vague hope that somewhere out there lies the answer to one’s life.

If there’d been a mosque at basic training, I’d probably have started believing in Allah as well.

From what Hamza told me, apparently even grilling pork belly can be forgiven as long as one diligently prays. Father Jeong Yonghwan and Bosal Geulmun probably possessed a far greater sense of duty than I ever did.

I believed all of us deserved at least some respect for standing their ground and fighting instead of running from these horrific monsters.

And so, I leveled my rifle at the priest monster, which had lost its network of capillaries and was writhing helplessly in the fog mixed with yellow smoke.

My hands throbbed, stung, and burned from being cut with a knife and bitten with my own teeth, but…

If it were for someone who had saved my life, even if only once, I could endure this much.

A line from a prayer I’d heard back in basic training suddenly came to mind.

Our Father, who art in Heaven…

Please don’t leave leftovers, and scrape the scorched rice clean before you go.

-Babang!

As shell casings rolled across the ground, the priest monster finally stopped struggling. Lowering my rifle as acrid gunsmoke drifted from the muzzle, I stared at the priest’s corpse with mixed emotions.

If that Father in Heaven was going to take him, shouldn’t He have taken the whole body instead of scooping out just his head?

I didn’t know what Father Jeong Yonghwan had done as a clergyman to deserve such an end. But at least for me, I couldn’t help but sincerely mourn his death. He had done his best. He was a human being who had laughed, cried, raged, and grieved.

Right then, Lee Sejun approached and stopped beside me, adjusting his rifle as he watched the priest’s final moments. He’d volunteered to recover Bosal Geulmun’s remains. But after taking two grenade blasts head-on, it seemed there wasn’t even a body left to recover.

"Why is it always the decent, good people who die like this first?”

"It’s tragic. But there’s still one piece of good news for you, Lee Sejun-ssi.”

"Good news?”

"I, Baek Jemin, am still alive.”

Lee Sejun fell silent.

Assuming he was overwhelmed by profound emotion and admiration, I graciously allowed him some time to process it. As for me, I simply offered a silent prayer for Bosal Geulmun and Father Jeon Yonghwan.

-Huuuff—.

A breath escaped through my gas mask. Then, at last, I heard footsteps coming from the stairs leading down to the platform. Lieutenant Baek Hansung and his soldiers, who had wisely avoided rushing in recklessly, were finally making their way down.

"Operators, are you alright?!”

Pushing through the fog, Lieutenant Baek Hansung and his men appeared, having equipped themselves more thoroughly in the meantime.

Several soldiers, including the lieutenant, had attached action cameras and lights to the helmets they wore over their gas masks as they rapidly scanned their surroundings. Others maintained firing positions and covered every approach from the stairwell to the platform entrance.

Nearby stood Shin Nain, his complexion still a little pale. But the relaxed confidence had returned to his eyes.

Tapping his ear a couple of times, he pulled up the hood of his poncho and walked over to us.

"Impressive. The blackboard-scratching sounds are gone. How’d you kill it?”

"Well, we didn't do anything special. We just did our jobs. Lee Sejun-ssi got a pretty good throwing arm, so we took one of them out practically for free.”

I was relieved that I’d finally discover Lee Sejun’s true value.

Even if he wasn’t as good at detection as me, who could see 10 seconds into the future, or Shin Nain, who could hear the monster’s instinctive inner voices, Lee Sejun had one thing going for him, and that was his ridiculous stamina. And when he threw grenades, they didn’t arc through the air but just flew forward in a straight line. Between that and his control, he had all the makings for an excellent baseball player.

What does being an excellent baseball player mean? It meant being absurdly talented at handling thrown weapons like grenades.

Of course, a part of me was relieved I hadn’t awakened Heart-branch magic. It was one thing that I’d gotten Eyes- and Hand-branch magic, but if my magic had turned out to be nothing more than being able to throw really hard and far, I’d have felt seriously cheated.

Still, compared to the fact that his magic was kind of plain and barely even felt like magic, Lee Sejun seemed more relieved that he’d actually been useful.

Letting out a long sigh, he absentmindedly fiddled with his rifle’s selector switch.

"Honestly, it might be better if you stay in the back and throw grenades instead of taking the lead. Bring more grenades instead of extra magazines.”

When I asked why someone who could already sprint at full speed for 30 seconds without tiring had suddenly gotten even stronger, the answer was actually quite simple.

Apparently, while hiding in the tunnel, Lee Sejun had opened the Magic Crash Course booklet inside the fog.

Somehow managing to fight through the nausea, he awakened the second stage of Heart-branch magic. He explained that it wasn’t just being able to throw things really hard and really far after all.

"The 2nd Stage of the Heart-branch is…overall sensory enhancement, I guess? My hands move exactly how I want them to, and I can make perfect use of my strength…”

"Sounds like the Heart-branch is pure physical enhancement.”

Shin Nain rubbed his chest with interest.

I was about to add a few thoughts of my own when my eyes met Lieutenant Baek Hansung’s. He, who had been scanning the area while maintaining a firing stance, looked like he wanted to get out of this platform, buried beneath a strange fog, patches of dried brown blood, ceiling debris, and fragments of the mangled train cars, as quickly as humanly possible.

The corners of his eyes were bloodshot, and they trembled ever so slightly.

"Let’s finish searching this area first. Our lieutenant looks like he’s about to lose his mind.”

"That’s…Thank you!”

For detection and search missions like this, Shin Nain was far more useful than Lee Sejun.

The guy was a complete religious nutcase, but he could properly monitor places my eyes couldn’t cover, and he had remarkably strong mental fortitude. He was a dependable companion. That said, I am quite honest by nature, so I couldn’t bring myself to call him a good companion even as a courtesy.

"Shin Nain-ssi, let’s handle detection together again. As for calling you Shitmaster earlier, that was simply my honesty slipping out under pressure, so let’s move past it.”

"Baek Jemin-ssi. Did you know you’ve been calling me Shitmaster since the moment I got out of the truck at Suwon Station?”

Fortunately, before he could press the matter any further, the search of Suwon Station’s B2 platform began in earnest. Lieutenant Baek Hansung brought 20 soldiers from the 2nd Squad and secured the area around the platform entrance first, running bales down before setting up searchlights.

The soldiers swept the underground with powerful beams that replaced the flickering station lights. Those equipped with action cameras followed the searchlights with their heads, recording everything they saw.

The soldiers carrying lights split into teams of 5 and guarded the rail lines. Rather than pushing all the way to the ends, where they might be ambushed, they maintained a distance from one another, with 2 men covering long-range approaches while three watched nearby areas.

Only after several soldiers recovered the fallen drones near the stairs did Lieutenant Baek Hansung finally request a detailed report.

"I’d like the Operators to explain exactly what kind of monster you encountered.”

Without saying a word, I pointed at the ceiling with my index finger. One of the searchlights, and Lieutenant Baek Hansung’s gaze followed it.

The dried, shriveled web of blood vessels clinging to the ceiling was still emitting a faint red glow as it died. That alien life form, deprived of any further opportunity to feed or reproduce, was crumbling into blood-colored dust.

-Crack.

A clump of blood dust fell from above, to which Lieutenant Baek Hansung jumped backward in alarm.

-Huff, huff, huff…

His ragged breathing made it obvious just how startled he was. Only then did I begin giving a more detailed explanation, leading him toward the priest’s corpse, trapped within the slowly thinning fog.

"That monster used the Operators’ corpses like scarecrows. Uh, you know, like those claw machines, right? Like the crane in one of those. It also sang some bizarre song through them, and listening to it causes severe dizziness and nausea, just like looking at magic symbols.”

"Y-You think that was the monster that attacked the drones with sound?”

"Probably.”

Me, Lee Sejun, and Shin Nain took turns explaining everything we’d witnessed.

The main body was the web of capillaries plastered across the ceiling. It operated headless human bodies like puppets, though those puppet bodies became incapacitated when disconnected from the network. They didn't seem to die completely, however. And considering that only the corpse of the two Operators who’d been eaten by Amalgams had been turned into puppets, there was likely some sort of connection to be found there.

As for how the creature fed and reproduced, what I’d seen served as some circumstantial evidence.

The three of us guided Lieutenant Baek Hansung to a spot a little removed from the center of the platform. There, uniforms and torn civilian clothes that had been hidden beneath the fog and debris became visible.

Looking down at the discarded clothing strewn across the floor, I shared my theory.

"Judging by how it launches stealth attacks from the ceiling and how its blood vessels tried to pierce my flesh and merge with my circulatory system, I think it probably fuses with its prey at the vascular level so they can’t escape. Then it weaves its blood vessels into a net, drags them up to the ceiling, and dissolves their bodies to consume them. When I was hiding under that crushed train over there, it spread a web dense enough to make the entire train look like a giant lump of meat.”

"What?"

"Huuh?”

Not just Lieutenant Baek Hansung, but even Lee Sejun and Shin Nain were staring at me with wide eyes. For a second, I wondered if I’d said something strange.

"I’m saying the monster’s blood vessels came into my flesh like tentacles and tried to merge with my circulatory system…”

"Uwaaaagh!!!”

Lieutenant Baek Hansung recoiled out of sheer terror, frantically tightening the grip on his weapon.

However, startled as he was, he fumbled his rifle, staggered backward, and ended up falling flat on his ass. His breathing turned ragged inside his gas mask. Worse, he started looking at me like I was the monster.

Lee Sejun’s face also turned pale as he subtly took a few steps behind Lieutenant Baek Hansung. Only Shin Nain nodded with a strangely knowing smile.

"Just as expected of someone protected by the Lord. Such unwavering resolve in the face of Satan’s power. Though you’re a non-believer, I should learn from your example.”

Only after Shin Nain vouched for me did Lieutenant Baek Hansung finally manage to catch his breath and continue the operation.

That didn’t mean I escaped a stern warning.

"Baek Jemin-ssi, even if you’re fine right now, you’re going to be under observation for a while. Let’s finish clearing Suwon Station Underground first.”

"Wait, is it really that big of a...?"

Just when I started to object, I immediately stopped myself.

If someone who’d been rubbing cheeks with an Amalgam started insisting they were perfectly fine, I’d probably shoot first and ask questions later too.

And so the joint operation between the Supreme Archmages and the soldiers began.

Most of the monsters had already been dead for quite some time. But a handful of Amalgams and Predator Spines had remained hidden in sealed-off spaces and inside the wrecked train cars.

Fortunately, once Shin Nain got his head back in the game, the cleanup proceeded quickly.

"Forward, little soldiers of Jesus~. With Him~ leading the way!!!”

Shin Nain would sing hymns in a swaying, lilting voice. Then, the moment he sensed a monster, his tone would abruptly sharpen and he’d signal the rest of us. And whenever a fight was imminent, he stopped talking entirely and let the soldiers aim first. Apparently his ability to hear the voices inside other people’s minds wasn’t a lie after all, because his coordination was impeccable.

Whenever Shin Nain stopped singing and pointed somewhere, I would raise my injured right hand and prepare the 2nd stage of the Eyes-branch. I’d slathered the wound with enough antiseptic to make Albothyl look gentle and wrapped it in bandages. The sharp, throbbing pain felt pleasantly intense, and I could tell that even the slightest shock would trigger the spell instantly.

Then, whenever an Amalgam finally couldn’t take it anymore and revealed itself in response to our presence, I would clench my right hand and squeeze the wound, just enough to make it hurt, but not enough to tear it open again.

With the lingering aftereffects in my injured left hand and the sting of antiseptic in my right already primed, that was more than enough.

The moment I did, an Amalgam formed of five people fused together would freeze in place.

-Ratatata...

The Amalgams normally dealt with concentrated fire by splitting apart and scattering. They were able to move about as quickly as a sprinting human after all. But now, before they could split apart, I could force a stun on them and leave them exposed long enough for the soldiers to shoot their weak point, the head, and drain them of their bodily fluids. With that, even a standard infantry squad could hunt them efficiently.

And as Shin Nain’s identification abilities improved, it became much easier to locate areas where Predator Spines were lying in ambush.

"Amalgams sound like different screams overlapping out of rhythm. The blackboard-scratching sound seems to belong to the Predator Spines. There’s one hiding inside the twisted seats of that crushed train over there.”

"There’s a Predator Spine in there?”

Lee Sejun rolled an unpinned grenade across his palm and narrowed his eyes.

Whenever a Predator Spine’s hiding place was identified, everyone would back away. Then Lee Sejun would take a grenade, pull the pin, cook it for a moment, and hurl it into the hiding spot to suppress the monster with the explosion. We followed this process to not give the thing even the slightest chance to fight back.

The military and our group both knew the truth. This wasn’t a war against humans. It was a battle against monsters that hunted humans. And that meant we had to dismantle every desperate tactic and survival strategy those things might possess.

February 5, 2028, 5:43 PM.

The first sweep of Suwon Station’s B2 underground platform had finally concluded. Putting away my phone with its cracked screen, I looked around.

At long last the fog was beginning to clear.

Only now could our trio, Lieutenant Baek Hansung, and the soldiers finally remove our gas masks and breathe. Drops of moisture formed from sweat and breath rolled off the rubber lining inside my mask and dripped from my chin. Major Jang Shinmyeong’s CBRN unit entered shortly after and began burning the corpses.

They’d even brought fire extinguishers in preparation for the risk of accidental fires.

Watching the bodies burn and release their nauseating stench, I pulled out my canteen once more. Shin Nain tilted his canteen over his head and washed his face. Lee Sejun let out a long sigh. And I drank every last drop of water I had left.

If this was the second containment line, I could only imagine what the first containment line, the Seoul Front, must be like.

* * *

February 12, 2028, 12:01 AM.

After returning from Suwon Station, what awaited me was an investigation far more intense than I’d expected.

Blindfolded and restrained, I was taken to some medical facility and subjected to every scan imaginable, like MRIs and CT scans, tests I’d always avoided because they were a pain in the ass. But even that wasn’t enough. They dragged in some shaman I’d never heard of before to verify things.

Only after all that was it proven that I was human.

Officially and administratively.

And immediately afterward, I was summoned for a one-on-one meeting with the nameless colonel. The fact that they’d assigned Shin Hangi, someone I actually knew and had built some sort of rapport with, as my escort was probably their version of being considerate.

Standing in front of the conference room door, Shin Hangi offered an awkward smile.

"Don’t be nervous. It’s good news.”

When I entered the conference room, only the colonel was inside.

Noticing my arrival, he removed his cap, rubbed at his patchy white hair, and let out a deep sigh. Without a word, Shin Hangi saluted and closed the door behind him.

That was when the colonel approached me and pulled a small box from inside his coat and held it out toward me.

"Civilian Operator Baek Jemin. First, I owe you an apology for our excessive caution. The military prioritized verifying your condition rather than commending your achievements, and I regret that it delayed the recognition you rightfully deserved.”

"Is this really the military?”

The thought ‘This definitely isn’t the military I know' occurred to me a split second after the words actually left my mouth.

The colonel let out a snort and dusted off his thigh.

"In a world that’s more or less gone to hell and has nuclear warheads pointed at us, you’re surprised the military’s changed?”

"Yes."

"Good grief.”

The colonel forced the box against my chest and turned away with his hands clasped behind his back.

"For the successful liberation of Suwon Station’s underground levels, you’ve been awarded 40 MPCs. And another 10 as a bonus for the low casualty count. So, 50 MCPs in total. And I omitted part of the report regarding the Hand-branch magic. I only reported the shape of the magic character and its branch classification. Looking at it normally, it just looks like some kind of chart, but once you realize it’s a magic symbol, they seem to take on a grotesque, bizarre form, practically making you want to throw up. The administrative staff are having the time of their lives because of it.”

"Omitted?”

At my question, the colonel turned back toward me with a bitter smile.

It was the sort of smile worn by someone exhausted by life itself and steeped in regret. His weary sighs just showed how resigned to this horrifying reality he was.

"According to your testimony, the 1st stage Hand-branch spell allows blood shed from the right hand to harm monsters, correct? Desperate people will do anything. Just like the military has changed, there are plenty of people who want to study the Alteration-type magic system, whether it’s for survival or to obtain greater power.”

The colonel winked and chuckled.

"A week ago, thanks to you, Baek Jemin-ssi, nobody died. Nothing short of a miracle. It’s the first mission against those damn goddamn monsters where we didn’t lose a single person. So I’d like you to live a long, healthy life. If someone absolutely has to get dragged away and treated like a lab rat, I’d rather it not be the guy saving my soldiers.”

As he said that, he casually amicably waved at me like some neighborhood uncle.

"I already told the mess officer and the quartermaster to set aside whatever you want, Spam, Richam, whatever. We’ll take good care of you, so let’s work well together.”

Hehe...

Smiling, I raised my hand. Specifically, I raised my still-injured right hand. The colonel completely misunderstood what I meant.

"Oh? A high-five?”

-Snap.

I folded my other three fingers and raised only my index and middle fingers, forming a V shape. The colonel’s grin grew even wider.

"Hahaha, what? You want to take a commemorative photo or something, Baek Jemin-ssi?”

"20 more MPCs."

"..."

"I’ll work hard. So just hand over some more MPCs."

I’d learned a lot during the Suwon Station operation.

I couldn’t keep destroying my left and right hands every single time. My staff’s durability will run out first. Therefore, a truly great wizard shouldn’t just rely solely on magic.

Just look at the original Gray Wizard. If you think back on it, that old man spent more time swinging a sword than zapping people with lightning.

In other words—

Good gear mattered as well!

* * *

It was while I was sitting in the cafeteria, stuffing my face with both Spam and Richam.

Pastor Park Yohan plopped down beside me, setting a towering stack of books onto the table.

"Well, if it isn’t Aphorism’s greatest resident lunatic. Raking in 70 MCPs, huh?”

"Aphorism…?”

The name sounded familiar, but only vaguely, so I tilted my head.

"What? Already got dementia? That’s the name of our group.”

"Pastor, no matter how I think about it, that name sucks ass.”

"You picking a fight with me right now?”

After a brief round of bickering, Pastor Park Yohan adjusted his glasses and tapped the books beside him.

"Baek Jemin-ssi, I heard you learned magic of the Hand-branch. Shin Nain and Lee Sejun told me it’s something the people of Aphorism needed to know.”

"Yeah, more or less.”

Originally, I’d considered pulling up the ladder behind me and making sure nobody else could learn it. But then I realized there was a decent chance I’d end up fighting entire hordes of monsters by myself if I did that, so I naturally changed my mind. If another wizard in Aphorism learned the Hand-branch spell, then I wouldn’t have to be the only one bleeding buckets every time something needed to be killed. Everyone would win.

The pastor, however, was interested in something else entirely.

"I went to Pyeongtaek this time. I met some mystical heretics there and had to learn some absolutely disgusting, forbidden knowledge. I didn’t really have a choice though, as the one responsible for Aphorism’s intellectual integrity.”

"Ah, Father. Our Father!”

For a brief moment, I imagined an alternate timeline where Father Jung Yonghwan had survived and taken the pastor’s place. Ah, Father. Why did you have to leave us so soon?

"Why on earth are you calling for some heretic who workshops that pope? Anyway!”

"Right."

"So far, counting the Hand-branch you discovered, we’ve identified four branches of magic. Eyes, Ears, Hands, and Heart. According to those American Yankee heretics who arrived in Pyeongtaek, everyone's split into 2 camps. One side believes these four branches correspond to the 4 Elements, the Four Elements Theory. The other side thinks there are more branches out there and argues for the Multiple Branches Theory.”

"The 4 Elements…? You mean like water, fire, wind, and earth?”

"Exactly. There’s also the 4 Humors theory. And while the number 4 gets treated as unlucky in East Asia because it sounds like the word for death, it’s not entirely negative either. You’ve got things like the 4 Guardian Beasts, right?”

At that point, the pastor suddenly lowered his voice and glanced around before leaning in.

"Now, about the 1st Stage Hand-branch spell you discovered. The one where blood shed from the right hand can repel monsters. There’s something symbolically significant about that.”

Half of me was annoyed by the warm breath hitting my face, the other half was curious.

Unfortunately, my desire to study magic was stronger, so I suppressed my irritation and furrowed my brow.

"The right hand traditionally symbolizes divine authority and order. The power of the Lord. And the left hand, the one you’ve shot, burned with blazing hot rifle barrels, bitten, and generally abused in every way imaginable, is often associated with bad omens or certain occult connotations. At least, that’s how it’s commonly viewed.”

"..."

"That’s a pretty strange coincidence, don’t you think?”

At that, I couldn’t help but grimace.

It looked like I was going to have to humor the pastor and do some studying with him until these injuries healed…

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