WeTried Translations
Translator/Editor: Haruto
Discord: https://dsc.gg/wetried
◈ Even in a Dark Fantasy, You Still Have to Eat ◈
Chapter 59: Kerning Town, Party Quest # 5
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Creeeak.
When I opened the wooden door and stepped inside, the smell of alcohol hit my nose.
The place was loud with people drinking and talking.
“Things are crazy around Kerning Town.”
“I heard talking beasts are attacking humans.”
“Fuck, where did those monsters even come from?”
“Shh, look over there. Someone’s here.”
There were about ten people inside.
A few pairs of eyes turned toward me.
‘If they look down on me in a place like this, I’ll die.’
Hup.
I tensed my stomach and put on the fiercest expression I could manage.
Then I approached an older woman who seemed to be the innkeeper.
“Hey.”
She was fairly old, and one of her eyes seemed to be fake. Its pupil was white.
Squeak, squeak.
As she polished a glass, the woman spoke.
“Need to take a shit? Why are you making that face?”
“How much for one night?”
“Five hundred thousand Ether per person.”
That was fucking expensive!
“Ahem. What goods do you sell?”
“You’re a troublesome one. Malax!”
Creak, creak.
Soon, a large brute came over, making the wooden floor groan beneath him.
“Yes, ma’am.”
His hair looked like it had not been washed in days, and several of his teeth were missing.
His face was free of wrinkles, but an axe blade was embedded in the left side of his forehead.
How was he even alive?
That question only lasted a moment before the man led me to what looked like a storage room.
It was packed with cheese, wine, cabbage, and sausages.
There were also plenty of exploration supplies, such as Ether Torches, ropes, and daggers.
“You have a lot of goods?”
I asked the axe man.
He scratched his head.
“Bring them from the city.”
So these were goods brought from Kerning Town.
One string of sausages cost fifty thousand Ether.
Cheese and wine cost one hundred thousand Ether.
‘Fucking expensive!’
Still, I learned that this inn had an impressive amount of supplies.
I went back outside and told Mr. Hammer.
“Five hundred thousand for one night? What kind of outrageous price is that?”
Mr. Hammer was furious.
“But it might still be better than dying while camping outside!”
Mr. Hammer paid the landlady two million Ether for the room.
That bold decision made me shudder.
“Mr. Hammer, that’s such a waste of Ether!”
How many chickens could we buy with two million Ether?
Still, Mr. Hammer seemed to have thought it through.
“If we put it down as an expense, we can get all of it back after the mission.”
“Hehehe, then I’ll have bread, cheese, and dried fish!”
A free place to sleep and free food.
‘Explorers really are the best.’
Ever since becoming an explorer, everything had been going my way.
It was almost scary that my life could be this happy.
I had capable companions like Mr. Hammer and Hermit.
Even that Felix was good.
‘I have to protect this life somehow.’
Just then, a man with a flushed, drunken face approached us.
“Looks like your whole party deserted after failing an important mission.”
Heh heh heh.
The man laughed loudly.
He was bald, and his face was covered in triangular tattoos.
“……”
Click.
Felix’s hand moved to his sword hilt.
Before he could cut the man’s head off, I hurriedly spoke.
“Stop wagging your tongue and get to the point.”
“Oho, you’re really worked up. Fine.”
Swish.
The man with the triangular tattoos laid a map on the table.
“I’m Walker, a traveling merchant.”
“Enough with the introductions. What’s this map for?”
“To reach Kerning Town, you have to cross these hills. Bandits and monstrosities often appear there, so the more people in your group, the better.”
He wanted us to join his group.
Tap, tap.
Mr. Hammer tapped his foot twice beneath the table.
It was a signal that he thought it was a good offer.
Having more people would also help us travel through the Land of Night.
But there was one thing I did not like.
“You blow your nose, and we’re the ones who get our hands dirty?”
These men were planning to use our party as guards.
Walker the merchant laughed as if I had seen right through him.
“I’ll cover all the food and Ether Torches for the trip.”
“I’m Hammer.”
Swish.
Mr. Hammer stood and held out his hand.
# # #
The room fit four people.
Hermit looked unhappy about sharing a room with us men.
Still, it was better than camping outside.
“Eek! There’s a mouse!”
Hermit freaked out at the mouse scurrying across the bed.
Mr. Hammer laughed.
“Haha! That proves this inn is safe. Animals instinctively know where it’s safe, don’t they?”
“Mr. Hammer, can we trust that merchant?”
Felix asked while tending to his sword.
We were all thinking the same thing.
The humans who lived in the Land of Night were not normal.
Most were criminals who had broken Imperial law and fled.
Of course we had to stay on guard.
But unlike the damp ground outside, the inn bed was incredibly comfortable.
I fell asleep the moment I lay down.
When I came to my senses, it was already morning.
Walker the merchant was waiting for us in front of the inn.
“Fellas, let’s get going!”
Walker was a talkative man.
He never stopped talking, but it made it easy to get information from him.
“You came through that thornbush forest? Puhaha! Bullshit!”
Walker did not believe that we had crossed the Wandering Forest.
From what I heard, even people around here considered the forest a dangerous place.
“They say monsters live there!”
At that moment, Hermit seemed to notice something troubling among Walker’s goods.
“Is that witch mushroom? It’s highly addictive. I thought growing or selling it was banned.”
“Wow, are you knowledgeable because you’re a mage? This is my main source of income.”
“Don’t tell me you can even trade witch mushrooms in Kerning Town!?”
“Hehehe. It’s not something you can buy and sell easily even there.”
“Mr. Walker, have you heard of any skilled blacksmiths?”
I asked Walker while gathering information on processing the scales.
“Skilled?”
After thinking for a while, he nodded.
“Ah, I heard the Emperor of the Abyss kidnapped a dwarf to make equipment.”
“A dwarf?”
“Short bastards with big beards.”
That explanation alone did not tell me much.
As we exchanged information, it soon grew late.
We were about to prepare camp when Walker urged us onward.
“Mr. Hammer, if we go just a little farther, we’ll see the city!”
He wanted us to walk a little farther instead of camping.
We had already hunted plenty of monstrosities that came at us that day.
We had earned one million Ether alone.
You always had to stay tense in the Land of Night, so we became more than twice as exhausted.
And he wanted us to skip camp and keep walking?
Mr. Hammer asked him.
“How much farther?”
“About half a day!”
“Can’t we go tomorrow?”
“To be honest, the guards are the least alert at this hour. It’s the perfect time to slip into the city.”
Walker laughed and scratched his nose.
Something seemed suspicious.
But Mr. Hammer appeared to think his suggestion made sense.
We were on an infiltration mission too.
If we could enter the city secretly, that would be ideal.
“If you try anything stupid, you die.”
Creak.
Mr. Hammer clenched his gauntleted fist and held it before Walker’s face.
Walker flinched.
“Come on! I know how skilled you fellas are. Why would I be crazy enough to try something? I’d rather hire you as my personal guards!”
He did not seem to be lying.
“Especially that young mage. Her skills are amazing. How many spells does she know?”
“That’s a secret.”
Hermit turned her head away with a huff.
So we decided not to camp and walk a little farther.
“There it is!”
Walker had not lied about the city being close. After walking for about two more hours, we could see its walls.
The stone wall looked quite sturdy.
It was around two meters tall.
“See? I told you! Just a little farther!”
Ether Torches burned at regular intervals along it, which was genuinely surprising.
How much Ether would all those be worth?
‘Fuck, does this city have Ether rotting away everywhere?’
Now I understood why every Thief sang Kerning Town’s praises.
The city entrance was packed with people hoping to strike it rich overnight.
“Open the gate!”
“Why won’t you let us in?”
“We barely made it here after avoiding the monsters!”
“Mr. Hammer, let’s go this way. Over here!”
Mr. Walker led us to a section of the outer wall.
There was a small hole in the city wall.
When he knocked on it twice, a voice came from the other side.
“Walker?”
“Yeah, it’s me!”
“Damn, your timing is perfect! Get in! Hurry!”
Scrape.
Someone on the other side moved some stones.
A hole large enough for one person to pass through appeared in the city’s outer wall.
Walker crawled inside.
We followed the merchant, and at last entered Kerning Town.
‘...This is the city of thieves!’
It was too dark to see much because it was night.
Still, I liked the Ether Torches burning everywhere.
“Mr. Hammer, welcome to Kerning Town. I have urgent business, so I’ll be going now!”
Walker hurried off with his companions.
Phew.
Felix let out a relieved sigh.
“I thought that man was going to betray us. Surprisingly, nothing happened.”
True. It had been a better connection than expected.
Without Walker, we would have been stopped at the city entrance.
As relief drained the strength from my body, Mr. Hammer clapped his hands.
“Now the real work begins. See this face?”
Flutter.
Mr. Hammer unfolded a scroll for us.
It was a portrait.
The drawing was incredibly detailed, even showing the beauty mark near the eye.
Whose face was important enough to be drawn so carefully?
“We need to find this girl in the city. She should be about ten years old.”
“Mr. Hammer, is this our mission?”
“Yeah. Let’s split up, then meet here again at this time tomorrow.”
It was probably better to split up than stay together.
Still, being left alone so suddenly made me feel completely lost.
‘How am I supposed to find one little kid in this huge, unfamiliar place?’
Swish.
At that moment, I felt someone reaching into my pocket.
Was it because this was a city of thieves?
A pickpocket already?
“Even if I wanted to pretend not to notice, you’re way too clumsy.”
I grabbed the person’s wrist.
“L-Let go...!”
A woman was panicking badly.
No, she seemed more like a girl than a woman.
She was young.
Her short purple hair even made her look like a boy.
And the beauty mark near her eye looked especially familiar.
“Huh? You...!”
She was the girl in the portrait Mr. Hammer had shown us.
Just then.
“Where did she go?”
“Catch her! Catch her!”
“...Gasp!”
Someone shouted angrily.
The girl panicked like a mouse caught stealing food.
“L-Let go!”
“You little brat. Looks like you didn’t just pick my pocket, did you?”
“Let go of me!”
Why had Mr. Hammer been looking for this kid?
I was glad to have found her so quickly, but...
“Who are you?”
“……”
Her gaze wavered at my question.
She did not seem likely to tell me easily.
“Oh, really?”
Possession Insight.
「Possession Check Successful!」
I wanted to see what she had.
Sometimes, possessions revealed someone’s identity.
「Half-Eaten Bread x1」
「Eagle Button」
An Eagle Button?
That was the thing Ms. Ezakiel had given me.
The item that could strengthen equipment!
‘If I’m lucky, I might be able to strengthen my weapon one more time.’
I slipped a hand into the kid’s pocket.
My pickpocketing skill was so good that the kid did not even notice.
‘Kid, this is how you steal.’
A small button landed in my hand.
「Eagle Button: An exquisitely crafted button of gold and jewels. Its pattern may only be used by the Emperor who rules the Human Empire and the Emperor’s direct family.」
“Ooh...”
I carefully put the button I had stolen back into her pocket.
It was the first time in my life that I had returned something I stole.
‘This doesn’t seem like something a petty criminal like me can handle...!!!?’
Footnotes:
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