WeTried Translations

Translator/Editor: ZERO_SUGAR

Discord: https://dsc.gg/wetried

◈ Got a Gallery in the Wild ◈

Chapter 100: Firewood (3)

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[Post title] Holy Kingdom of El Dorado: Here’s What Really Happened.

[Post] El Dorado had known about the Undying King’s plan for a long time.

[Post] The Undying King transformed the citizens into undead in an instant. The killings were the groundwork for that.

[Post] They believed that if the people died as humans rather than undead, they could retain at least a shred of dignity, so they had no choice but to carry out the killings.

[Post] As a result, quite a few people are suffering from psychological trauma.

[Post] And all these lies came from the gallery. Therefore, from now on, we will designate the gallery as evil.

[Post] Please do not dare question the will of the gods. We are doing our utmost as well.

[Post] That was roughly what I heard. These bastards are trying to label the gallery as evil again lol

└ That’s how all Holy Kingdoms are lol

└ It would’ve been fine if they hadn’t mentioned the gallery, but they just had to spoil things lol

└ Doesn’t look like everyone believes them, though?

└ Yeah, the mood was basically, “What kind of bullshit is that?” The Holy Kingdom’s reputation is already a complete mess.

└ They’re stoking the fire themselves lol

└ If that was really what happened, they would’ve said so long ago.

└ Who the hell would believe them lol

└ They’ve always strutted around talking about the will of the gods. Serves them right.

└ Breaking news. Kadir released a statement. The previous Hero chose suicide.

└ ??? What the hell does that mean?

└ Didn’t the previous Hero die with the Undying King?

└ Yeah, they died together, but apparently it was basically suicide.

└ Damn... I heard the previous Hero was an incredibly good person.

└ Did the Holy Kingdom pressure them? People have been saying the clergy have no fucking faith these days.

└ If that’s true, a riot might break out.

└ Not necessarily. What if they keep denying it until the end?

└ It’ll be different if testimonies start coming out one after another.

└ Forget all that, if you’re happy the Holy Kingdom is fucked, upvote this lol

└ Me, for one lol

└ Honestly, it feels so damn good! Those bastards yap about the will of the gods every time they do anything lol

└ What’s even funnier is that they tell believers the path is open to everyone, but if you’re not from the Holy Kingdom, you can’t even become a bishop lol

└ Their discrimination against demonkind is especially fucking bad. They treat them like terrorists.

The bait I’d unknowingly thrown out. The bait I thought would die down after a day.

It had gone beyond being discussed in the real world and turned into a massive blaze.

Most of the posts were tearing into the Holy Kingdom. Not a single one had anything nice to say.

[Post] What the hell did El Dorado ever do wrong, you gallery degenerates?

[Post] Did they pressure neighboring countries in the name of the gods’ will?

[Post] Did they frame innocent people as heretics and torture them to death?

[Post] Did clergy enter the slums and kill people?

[Post] Did they admit they were too busy to pray?

[Post] Did they double a region’s taxes because its people didn’t donate?

[Post] Did they label sports a drug, then get hit with Molotov cocktails by fans?

[Post] Did they attack the gallery at every chance, only to get caught with porn themselves?

[Post] Did they make laws preventing people from other countries from reaching archbishop or higher?

[Post] Did they call the people pigs and dogs, saying they’d forget soon enough?

[Post] Did they try to force a federation into existence to defeat the Demon King, then get cursed out by an empire?

[Post] Was that not enough, so they had to screw over the Balkan Kingdom too?

[Post] Did they turn refugees away during the Undying King incident, claiming they were infected?

[Post] Did they experiment on people when the undead plague spread?

[Post] What exactly did El Dorado do to deserve all this mockery? I honestly have no idea.

“Wow.”

They were just completely fucked up. Rotten to the core.

They say stagnant water turns foul, but this had gone beyond rot. It had turned into crude oil.

No. At least crude oil was useful somewhere. This was just garbage.

‘Every country has a dark side, but this is something else.’

That post made me understand in an instant why the Holy Kingdom had such a bad reputation.

Especially the part about people from other countries being unable to reach archbishop or higher.

That was practically them declaring they were going to keep all the good positions for themselves. It was blatantly unfair.

‘Can a religion really rot this badly?’

I hated the gods, but I didn’t hate religion or the people who believed in it.

I disliked extremists, sure, but a religious person had helped me when I was struggling.

But these people... they were closer to rotten politicians than people of faith.

Unless time passed and they died off, or a rebellion broke out like someone had said, it would be hard for things to change.

‘People are the same everywhere.’

Even if the world was different, people seemed to be the same.

I watched the gallery fill with every kind of joke post, then quietly closed it.

It looked like it would take a while before the part I wanted showed up.

If nothing came up, I could ask Allfather.

‘Still, they’re declaring the gallery evil? Give me a break.’

This wasn’t some military-style way of handling things. What the hell were they doing?

At least they didn’t seem bent on capturing me, so they appeared to have some sense.

Even if they tried, this was the Forest of Four Seasons. It was impossible. I just needed to keep doing what I had to do.

“Cough! Cough! Ugh.”

I coughed through the acrid smoke.

The campfire had been weak, so I added more firewood, but I’d overdone it.

I couldn’t exactly take any back out, which made things awkward.

‘It’s about time I thought of other ways to cook.’

There was grilling food directly over the fire, or cooking it on a cast-iron pan.

Those methods were enough to keep me fed, but they had a drawback.

The fish, which made up the bulk of my meals, were way too big.

Even after cutting off the heads, flipping them was a whole ordeal.

Parts would burn while others stayed undercooked. It was always a little uneven.

‘Would an oven be better for this?’

With an oven, I could reduce the burnt and undercooked parts as much as possible.

It also had the advantage of letting me do other things while the food cooked.

Since I’d decided to live here for a long time, an oven was practically a necessity.

‘I should try making one.’

Asking the gallery felt a little embarrassing, but there was one very suitable registered user.

I could get materials from that registered user while I was at it. Two birds with one stone.

[You]: Hey. You around?

[Passing Dwarf]: I’m here. Why?

[You]: What’s the occasion? You’re awake.

[You]: I thought you’d be hungover after drinking.

[Passing Dwarf]: I didn’t drink much yesterday.

[Passing Dwarf]: Why did you call?

[You]: It’s nothing major. I’m thinking of making an oven.

[You]: I’m buying bricks from the Auction House, but I wanted some tips from you.

[Passing Dwarf]: Just because I’m a dwarf doesn’t mean I can make everything;;

[Passing Dwarf]: I specialize in metallurgy, you idiot.

[You]: Aren’t dwarves all good with their hands?

[Passing Dwarf]: That’s separate from having a specialty.

[Passing Dwarf]: I can get you an iron plate for the oven, though, so tell me what you need.

[You]: Make it big enough to fit a fish without trouble.

[You]: You know how big they are, right?

[Passing Dwarf]: Yep. I’ll make it, so give me a piece once you bake something in the oven.

[You]: Yep. Oh, right.

[You]: Give me a barricade too.

[Passing Dwarf]: I forgot about that.

[Passing Dwarf]: I’ll give it to you when I bring the iron plate.

Then I should start preparing while I wait for the dwarf.

I’d woken up at six in the morning today. I’d spent thirty minutes on the gallery.

I usually ate breakfast at seven or seven-thirty, so I should be able to make the oven by then.

If it was too difficult, I could just have breakfast on the iron plate as usual. No problem there.

Splash! Splash!

There were three fish caught in the Fish Trap today.

It seemed to catch three fish whenever I woke up, and two at a time otherwise.

‘There won’t be a long-arm octopus, right?’

Even if it wasn’t a long-arm octopus, I planned to stay alert the moment I saw another living creature.

Thankfully, there was nothing except fish.

Humming to myself, I carried the Fish Trap full of fish down with me.

Rustle!

Then I heard rustling in the bushes.

The instant I heard it, I properly readied my weapon and went on guard.

After everything I’d been through, it was a natural reaction.

“...”

Yet all I could hear was the rustling.

I slowly relaxed my guard and stared in the direction it had come from.

‘Since it’s a little higher up instead of below... is it a bird?’

But even if it was a bird, I couldn’t hear any flapping wings.

Still puzzled, I returned to the cave. Nothing happened on the way back.

Splash! Splash!

Supply was starting to exceed demand.

It looked like I needed to buy a bigger metal drum.

Unless it rained again, I had nowhere to keep the fish alive until then. They would all rot.

‘This is a problem in its own way.’

The fish were too big. When food had been scarce, that had been a huge advantage, but now that I had enough, the downside was starting to show.

Still, the ability to eat my fill every meal was too valuable to give up.

‘That doesn’t mean I can stop gathering them.’

I never knew when food might become scarce again, so it was best to keep stockpiling supplies just in case.

After watching the fish swim energetically in the metal drum, I moved away.

Breakfast time was approaching, so I should at least start making the oven.

‘But where should I install it?’

I ran into an unexpected problem. Where would be the best place for an oven?

The cave was too cramped and smoky, but the weather would be an issue if I installed it outside.

After considering it over and over, I decided to place it right against the cave entrance.

Of course, I didn’t forget to account for rain in the design.

‘Once the oven is finished, I’ll put a tarp over it. I’ll slope it down so the water flows into the drainage ditch.’

To put an entire fish inside, I would need to make the oven fairly large.

I logged into the Auction House to check whether they had bricks in an appropriate size.

Maybe because bricks had been used since ancient times, there were plenty of varieties.

‘First, I need to level the ground.’

Making an oven required all sorts of preparation.

It looked like I would have to eat my usual breakfast today.

‘I’ll just prepare the materials and leave it at that.’

A pile of bricks. A tarp. Poles to secure the tarp, and so on.

I stacked the supplies near the cave entrance and prepared breakfast.

Wonmo happened to wake up at the same time.

‘This iron plate can go in the oven too.’

I ate fish for breakfast, then immediately began building the oven.

First, I leveled the ground as much as possible, then stacked bricks one by one with the fish’s size in mind.

The important part was the chimney for the smoke to escape through. I wasn’t smoking anything, so I made a passage for the smoke to leave through.

It had to let smoke escape while keeping as much rain out as possible.

‘And then... what was an oven’s structure again?’

I checked the gallery now and then to see what an oven looked like.

The Auction House sold ovens too, but they were expensive, and I didn’t know whether they came in the size I wanted.

Besides, a square, angular shape was much better than a round one. It was easier to build too.

‘Since the fish are so big, I should make it a little long.’

It didn’t need much height. What it needed was depth.

With all that in mind, I made the chimney at the very top. It looked great.

‘Perfect.’

The stone slab I installed had come from the Auction House, so I had nothing to worry about.

But this wasn’t the end. I still needed what I’d asked the dwarf for.

The dwarf said they would make it, but I should probably measure the length myself.

[You]: (A photo of the entire oven)

[You]: (A photo measuring the oven entrance with a tape measure)

[You]: Will this work?

[Passing Dwarf]: You made it pretty neatly.

[Passing Dwarf]: Put mud between those bricks.

[Passing Dwarf]: That’ll stop heat from leaking out and help the oven heat up better.

[You]: Thanks for the pro tip.

Following the dwarf’s advice, I gathered dirt from around the area and made mud.

It felt a little gross, but I could endure anything for the oven.

“Kyuu?”

“Daddy’s working.”

Wonmo came up beside me, but I stayed focused on building the oven.

Maybe he was curious about what I was doing, because he plopped down and watched.

He was so cute that I almost hugged him, but I barely held myself back.

Only after I applied all the mud was everything finished.

Technically, it wouldn’t be complete until I installed the tarp, but that could wait.

‘Perfect. Absolutely perfect.’

A smile naturally spread across my face as I looked at the finished oven.

Now I could post it on the gallery and brag about it. But when I entered the gallery...

[Post title] El Dorado Declares It Will Capture the Person Spreading False Information lol

A post I couldn’t easily ignore caught my eye. It was a featured post, too.

What kind of idiot would say something like that? I clicked on it.

It could have been ragebait, basically a bogus rumor, so I had to check.

[Post title] El Dorado Declares It Will Capture the Person Spreading False Information lol

[Post] Someone asked how they planned to catch that person, and they said they would do it through friendly discussions with the administrator.

[Post] But maybe that reporter browses the gallery too, because when someone said Grylls was in the Forest of Four Seasons, they said it didn’t matter lol

[Post] What’s even more shocking is that they formed a tracking party to catch Grylls lol

What?

Were they stocking the Forest of Four Seasons with survivors for my sake?

Footnotes:

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