WeTried Translations
Translator/Editor: ZERO_SUGAR
Discord: https://dsc.gg/wetried
◈ Got a Gallery in the Wild ◈
Chapter 24: Water (2)
──────
I had finished preparing to draw water from the river, but a few problems remained.
First, I had to somehow avoid the Golden Frogs. That was the biggest hurdle.
They leaped out the instant I put a hand in the water, so they were a massive pain.
The second problem was the river's depth. It was deep enough to swallow more than half my arm.
That meant it would be hard to secure anything with rocks. I checked the supplies the dwarf had given me.
‘Put the mesh over this and connect it to the hose...’
I looked back and forth between the shiny funnel and the mesh net meant to cover it.
Connecting the funnel to the hose was easy. Securing it was the difficult part.
‘Do I have no choice but to dig a little with the shovel?’
That was probably the answer.
I left the supplies near the river and went to get the shovel.
Thankfully, I didn't encounter any dangerous animals on the way.
The Mad Dog pack had died long ago, and the Owlbear had recently gone to the Auction House.
I probably wouldn't run into another apex predator for a while.
Besides, bugs like ticks were scarier than predators anyway.
Whoooosh-
With the shovel in hand, my preparations were finally complete.
I stared at the fast-flowing river, or maybe it was more of a stream, then carefully got to work.
First, I began digging into the bank with my shovel.
Thunk! Thunk!
Fortunately, no frogs jumped out.
Still, I made sure to look around every so often while digging, just in case.
Rushhh-
Eventually, I made enough space to fit the funnel.
I even placed rocks around the hole I'd dug to strengthen the flow.
The current was strong enough now. All that remained was connecting the hose.
I covered the funnel with the mesh net, then connected it to the hose.
Instead of cable ties, I firmly secured the connection with wire ties.
Since plastic hadn't been invented in this world yet, it seemed they used iron instead.
‘But wouldn't these be hard to make too?’
It made sense for a hose made from natural rubber to be expensive.
Still, these wire ties seemed even more expensive to me.
‘Is it because they're dwarves? Whatever.’
After checking that everything was secured, I moved on.
One hose wasn't enough. Since the distance was so great, I had to connect several hoses along the way.
“Sluuurp!”
Following the dwarf's instructions, I sucked hard on the end of the hose.
When I carefully lowered it afterward, the water came out much more forcefully than before.
I connected that hose to another one and tightly fastened them with wire ties.
I kept repeating the process until I finally reached the shelter.
After connecting the final hose to the valve, the work was done.
Rushhh-
“Nice. Very nice.”
The water flowed perfectly. Just looking at it made me happy.
Still, it wasn't completely over. Like I kept saying, this was the wilderness.
An animal could chew through the hose, so covering it with dirt was essential.
That brought my roughly two-hour job to an end.
It felt incredibly satisfying to know I wouldn't have to worry about water anymore.
“Kyuu?”
“Oh. You're awake?”
As it happened, Wonmo seemed to have woken up too.
Wonmo looked at me with his signature bright eyes.
I wanted to hug him, but his body was crawling with ticks.
‘Bath first.’
While I was at it, I needed to wash myself too.
I bought an iron tub from the Auction House and filled it with water.
After rinsing it several times and checking for debris, I filled it to the brim.
Then I lit a fire beneath it to warm the water.
‘Should give him deworming medicine too, right?’
I had laundry to do as well. I was pretty busy.
Since I was at it, I should make a drying rack too.
Having a steady supply of water opened up so many possibilities.
While the water in the tub heated up, I made a post on the Gallery.
[Post title] I'm rich now
[Author] Wild Grylls
[Post] (video of water gushing from the hose)
[Post] I'm rich in water now.
└ Oh. It worked?
└ Grats grats
└ You can bathe now.
└ [Wild Grylls]: Gotta wash Wonmo first. He's covered in fucking ticks;;
└ [Passing Dwarf]: You finished surprisingly fast. No problems?
└ [Wild Grylls]: Nothing in particular. Want a Mandrake later?
└ [Passing Dwarf]: Oh. I'd appreciate it. Straight into infused liquor lol
└ [Wild Grylls]: Fuck no.
└ LOL
└ LOL
└ Turning an expensive Mandrake into infused liquor;;
└ What kind of dwarf even are you? lol
└ [Heavenly Demon]: Now that you have water, what do you plan to do?
└ [Wild Grylls]: Not sure. Once I get a barrier from the dwarf, there won't be much left to do. At most, chop wood or explore the area?
└ [Heavenly Demon]: In that case, you may learn an Inner Energy Cultivation Method from me.
└ [Wild Grylls]: Sounds great. I'll wash Wonmo first and contact you after.
└ [Heavenly Demon]: I shall wait. I am looking forward to it as well.
└ [SwordTasteMaster]: The Inner Energy Cultivation Method aside, have you been practicing your swordsmanship too?
└ [Wild Grylls]: I've been looking it over consistently. I only know the basics so far.
└ [SwordTasteMaster]: Excellent. Get strong quickly and marry me.
└ [Wild Grylls]: Teacher?
└ [SwordTasteMaster]: I'm joking.
└ Doesn't sound like a joke?
└ That person's true feelings slip out a lot.
└ Are they that desperate to get married? lol
Um... This place really was full of weird people.
Still, it hadn't changed the fact that I was getting stronger every day thanks to SwordTasteMaster.
When I fought the Owlbear, a post had come to mind at the right time. Without that, I would have died.
“Hmm. This should be enough. Wonmo?”
“Kyuu?”
The water in the tub had warmed up by then.
It wasn't steaming, but considering the temperature in the forest, it was plenty warm.
I dragged the tub over to Wonmo.
It was wider from side to side rather than top to bottom, so it was the perfect size for him.
“Get in here. Time for a bath.”
“Kyuuu.”
Could he really understand what I said?
Wonmo stared at the tub with his bright eyes, then cautiously stepped inside.
It must have been his first time in warm water, because he flinched at first.
Luckily, he realized it wouldn't hurt him and carefully lowered his fluffy body into the water.
“Eekyuuuu...”
“Feels good, doesn't it?”
He even closed his eyes and relaxed.
I snorted softly and started washing Wonmo from head to toe.
I carefully applied bug repellent all over him as I removed every last tick.
‘Wouldn't this all be pointless once he starts wandering around again?’
It was something I'd have to deal with. I even used soap and scrubbed him hard.
Wonmo seemed to accept my touch, keeping his eyes closed.
The bathwater, on the other hand, got unbelievably filthy.
That was unavoidable in the wild. I just had to put up with it.
‘But I can't resist taking a picture.’
I posted a photo of Wonmo taking a bath on the Gallery.
Only his face was sticking out, and it was ridiculously adorable.
[Post title] Gave Wonmo a bath
[Author] Wild Grylls
[Post] (video of Wonmo bathing)
[Post] Cute, right? Give it a like if you think so.
└ That face is cheating;;
└ That little guy becomes a tyrant later?
└ This is healing me just by looking at it.
└ Ugh, filthy.
└ Your face is filthier.
└ I meant the water? Is your face dirty or something?
└ Fuck your mom.
How did twisted people show up even under such a cute post?
I had posted it to show off anyway, so I didn't really care.
That was when I was scrubbing Wonmo clean.
“Kyuuuuu...!”
Tremble-
Wonmo, who had been enjoying himself, suddenly began trembling.
The sudden change caught me completely off guard.
“Wonmo? Are you uncomfortable?”
“Kyuuu.”
“No? Then...”
What could it be? Just as I was wondering that...
Float-
Something rose to the surface of the dirty bathwater.
It was round, dark brown, almost black...
“...Wonmo. Did you poop?”
“Kyuu!”
“Gyaaaah! Get out! Now!”
It seemed I needed to start potty training first.
* * *
After washing Wonmo, I realized something.
Washing someone else, whether human or animal, was insanely difficult.
The water got so filthy that I had to replace it several times.
By the time I got to wash myself, the sun was already beginning to set.
“Nom nom, smack smack.”
“Is it good?”
“Smack smack smack.”
After washing Wonmo, I dried him off as much as possible with a towel.
It would've been nice to have a hair dryer, but I didn't, so the campfire would have to do.
I also gave him deworming medicine. True to an Owlbear that ate anything, he gulped it down without hesitation.
‘One of us gets meat, and the other only gets Fasting Pills. Great.’
I had bought Wonmo's meal at the Auction House. It was monster meat, just like breakfast.
Monster meat was the cheapest thing there. It was nearly useless, so it cost less than ten gold.
I grimaced as I put a bitter Fasting Pill in my mouth. It was bitter every time.
‘My stomach always hurts after eating these.’
Wonmo's potty training was simple.
Never poop inside the cave.
If you need to go, signal me. I'll stay beside you.
I didn't know whether he was particularly smart or Owlbears were just naturally like that, but he understood everything.
The claim that they were highly loyal as long as you fed them well wasn't an exaggeration.
‘I've eaten enough. Now for the Inner Energy Cultivation Method.’
Sitting cross-legged didn't hurt anymore.
It hadn't even been a week, but it felt like my flexibility had improved dramatically.
I wondered if that was even possible, but I wasn't about to question a good thing.
There was no point thinking too deeply about it. I wouldn't find an answer anyway.
[Post title] Heavenly Demon. Are you there?
[Author] Wild Grylls
[Post] I'd like to start learning the Inner Energy Cultivation Method now. Are you around?
└ [Heavenly Demon]: I have been waiting.
└ [Wild Grylls]: ???
└ Whoa. The post went up ten seconds ago, but the comment was from two seconds ago;;;
└ Isn't that stalker behavior?
└ For real, that's kind of scary;;
I was just as startled.
How could she leave a comment the moment I made a post?
Heavenly Demon had often been the first to comment before, but never this fast.
‘Uh... Is she really bored?’
More than that, it was probably close to repaying a favor, like she had said before.
How should I put it? It felt like a veteran player who had found a newbie.
Thinking of it that way made me feel better.
└ [Wild Grylls]: You were here. Like I said before, please leave private comments.
└ [Heavenly Demon]: Understood. First, sit in the lotus position.
I sat cross-legged as she instructed.
It still ached a little, but I could endure it now.
Just three days ago, I had let out girlish screams. I had come a long way.
‘Can I finally use mana or Internal Energy now?’
I was really looking forward to it. I could use energy straight out of fantasy or martial arts stories.
It would be nice if I could fire palm blasts someday.
Palm blasts had always been excellent for keeping enemies at range.
└ [Wild Grylls]: If I train, can I fire palm blasts too?
└ [Heavenly Demon]: Why do you ask?
└ [Wild Grylls]: To keep enemies at range?
└ [Heavenly Demon]: Do not. Only fools do such things.
└ [Wild Grylls]: Okay...
└ So dejected lol
└ But palm blasts are the dream...
└ There are truckloads of people who died chasing that dream.
└ How can anyone resist palm blosts!
└ It's palm blasts, dumbass.
└ Then can Heavenly Demon fire palm blasts?
└ [Heavenly Demon]: What a foolish question. Not mere palm blasts. The power of a typhoon erupts from my hand.
└ LOL, boasting is the one thing she's good at.
└ Just call yourself a mage lol
A keyboard battle had broken out of nowhere, but I ignored it.
Heavenly Demon's instruction was what mattered right now.
She seemed to know that too, judging by her new comment.
Naturally, it was private.
└ [Heavenly Demon]: Now that you are sitting in the lotus position, begin with Dantian Breathing.
└ [Wild Grylls]: What's Dantian Breathing?
└ [Heavenly Demon]: Ah. You said you did not know even how to sit in the lotus position. I shall explain it slowly.
Teacher Heavenly Demon kindly explained the concept of Dantian Breathing.
The area beneath the navel, or the lower abdomen, was called the dantian. I just had to put strength there every time I breathed.
People sometimes talked about screams or strength drawn from the dantian, didn't they?
She said it was roughly that kind of feeling, so the concept itself was easy.
She also explained that the middle dantian was the heart and the upper dantian was the brain, but said those weren't important yet.
‘Focus only on the lower abdomen, not my entire stomach.’
I closed my eyes and followed Heavenly Demon's explanation.
Like I said, I focused on my lower abdomen instead of my entire stomach.
“Inhale... Exhale...”
After repeating that a few times, I began feeling something in my dantian, my lower abdomen.
At first it tickled, then it felt like it was filling my entire lower abdomen.
I wondered whether that was normal, but something unexpected happened right after.
Shhhhaaa!
‘Huh? Huh?’
The energy gathered in my dantian began spreading in every direction.
It felt as though the vessel couldn't hold it and it was leaking out.
I had barely taken a few breaths, so of course I panicked.
‘W-What do I do?’
The energy rising from my dantian passed through my heart and brain, then spread throughout my entire body.
Dangerous. This was really dangerous. My instincts screamed at me.
I was a complete beginner. I had no idea what to do.
Thankfully, after making one full circuit, it settled down.
“Gasp... Gasp...”
I opened my eyes wide. A chill ran down my spine.
What the hell was that? Even as I gasped for breath, I couldn't stop wondering.
I was covered in cold sweat.
My nose in particular felt wet, so I instinctively touched it.
“...Blood?”
Blood. Old, black blood.
I wondered whether this was normal and hurriedly opened the Gallery.
└ [Wild Grylls]: Heavenly Demon. I followed what you said, and I got a nosebleed.
└ [Heavenly Demon]: What?!
Even through the comment, I could feel her shock.
She must have been really startled, because she immediately left another comment.
It wasn't private either, so everyone could see it.
└ [Heavenly Demon]: Aside from bleeding, are there any other problems? Do you feel dizzy or as though your insides are twisting?
└ [Wild Grylls]: I don't feel anything like that. The nosebleed was all.
The nosebleed stopped soon afterward too.
I thought Heavenly Demon might have been overreacting, but other comments added an explanation.
└ [SwordTasteMaster]: Isn't that an early symptom of Qi Deviation?
└ Yeah, seems like it. That was close.
└ You can get Qi Deviation just from Dantian Breathing?
└ [SwordTasteMaster]: Very rarely, there are people like that. When you were breathing, didn't it feel like the mana you had stored in your dantian, or Mana Hall, spread throughout your body?
└ [Wild Grylls]: Oh. That's right. How did you know?
└ [SwordTasteMaster]: That happened to me. You have an excessive amount of mana accumulated in your Mana Hall, and each breath takes in a terrifying amount of mana.
└ [Wild Grylls]: But I haven't had any chance to build up mana. What's going on?
└ [SwordTasteMaster]: Have you eaten anything like an elixir recently?
If it was an elixir... The only thing I had eaten was the Fasting Pills Heavenly Demon had given me.
Heavenly Demon seemed to realize that too and left a comment.
└ [Heavenly Demon]: How many of the Fasting Pills I gave you did you eat per day?
└ [Wild Grylls]: I ate three per meal, just in case...
└ [Heavenly Demon]: Wait a moment. I shall ask my close adviser and return.
└ Is his dick actually going to explode now?
└ Boom boom! LOL
└ [Wild Grylls]: You people are seriously fucking insane;;
└ But why did you eat so many? One per meal is enough.
└ [Wild Grylls]: I was worried I wouldn't get enough nutrients...
└ No lol They're elixir-grade, why would you lack nutrients lol
└ Didn't trust Heavenly Demon?
└ [Wild Grylls]: It's not that I didn't trust her. I just didn't know how potent elixir-grade stuff was. Isn't it basically a really good supplement?
└ He really was just dumb lol
└ Dumbass lol
└ [Starlight Princess]: The Adult Mandrake you gave me was elixir-grade too. Couldn't you compare it to that?
└ [Wild Grylls]: Other than Fasting Pills, I can't eat anything. I'm in the wild, and I burn a lot of calories too.
└ [Starlight Princess]: That makes sense.
└ [Passing Dwarf]: All right. Repeat after me three times: I'm an idiot.
└ [Wild Grylls]: What's with you?
└ [Passing Dwarf]: What?
└ [Wild Grylls]: I'll make a three-line acrostic with "What's with you?" Give me the first word.
└ LOL
└ LOL
└ LOL
They called it elixir-grade, so I thought it meant it had lots of nutrients.
Apparently, that wasn't the case. I felt deflated.
At least I found out before a major disaster happened.
└ [Heavenly Demon]: I have received an answer from my close adviser.
└ [Wild Grylls]: What did they say?
└ [Heavenly Demon]: Too much is as bad as too little.
└ [Wild Grylls]: ...
└ LOL
└ That hit hard.
└ Isn't that what Heavenly Demon wanted to say?
Tears flowed from my eyes.
At least my Johnson wasn't going to explode. As an ordinary person, though, I had suffered this reaction instead.
If I had eaten ten or more a day, it wouldn't just have been my Johnson exploding. My entire body could have burst apart.
They also said it would be better for me to practice Qi Circulation and Breath Regulation instead of Dantian Breathing.
The problem was that I had no idea how to do that.
Dantian Breathing was the most basic of basics, and Qi Circulation and Breath Regulation was the next step. I didn't even understand the basics.
I was wondering what I should do when...
└ [SwordTasteMaster]: Would you like to use the breathing technique I use? I was similar to you, Grylls.
└ [Heavenly Demon]: I have already decided to teach him, so stand aside.
└ [SwordTasteMaster]: I think my breathing technique would suit him better. I was like that once too.
└ [Heavenly Demon]: Is your breathing technique not the Mana Cultivation Method?
└ [SwordTasteMaster]: Yes. Is there a problem?
└ [Heavenly Demon]: The Mana Cultivation Method of the Western Kingdoms lacks depth compared to an Inner Energy Cultivation Method.
└ [Wild Grylls]: Excuse me?
└ [SwordTasteMaster]: I think it's better than being unable to even get started.
└ [Heavenly Demon]: A well must be dug deep.
└ [SwordTasteMaster]: I'll die of thirst while digging that well.
└ [Heavenly Demon]: Patience is bitter, but its fruit is sweet.
└ [Wild Grylls]: Excuse me? You two?
Would you two please listen to me?
Footnotes:
Join our discord at https://dsc.gg/wetried
