WeTried Translations
Translator/Editor: ZERO_SUGAR
Discord: https://dsc.gg/wetried
◈ Got a Gallery in the Wild ◈
Chapter 34: Moderator (1)
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After chalking up a loss to the Fast Sloth, I finished cleaning up.
It was a shame about the iron tub, but there were plenty on the Auction House, so restocking wouldn’t be difficult.
I’d also sold the Owlbear’s corpse and the logs, so I had plenty of money.
And since I’d put up the Inner Core a little while ago, I’d probably be even richer tomorrow.
‘How much will the Inner Core sell for?’
Heavenly Demon had said it was difficult to put a price on it.
That meant it would probably be undervalued.
An Inner Core was a rare elixir.
There were already posts about people getting scammed on the Auction House, so an Inner Core would be even worse.
It was only because I’d built up some trust that I had a chance. Even if people called me a scammer, I wouldn’t have much of a defense.
‘I haven’t personally experienced its effects, either.’
I’d felt stronger by eating the fish, not the Inner Core.
Even that wasn’t certain, since I had only just begun working with mana and Internal Energy.
Several registered users, including Heavenly Demon, had expertise in that area, but none of them were here with me.
Things even they didn’t understand were happening to my body, so I couldn’t be completely sure.
‘Still, it definitely did something.’
In less than a day, my strength and stamina had increased dramatically.
I’d easily finished simple manual labor like logging and digging.
I didn’t know the exact reason, but I’d grown stronger through that process. That much I could guarantee.
‘There’s still time. Should I scout the area first?’
The camp repairs were finished, and all I needed now was the wall from Passing Dwarf.
Before that, I needed to decide where to explore next. I went into the cave.
Wonmo was inside, sound asleep.
How could even sleeping be that cute and lovable?
I had to take a picture and post it.
[Post title] Round Little Furball
[Author] Wild Grylls
[Post] (A photo of Wonmo sleeping with his body curled into a ball)
[Post] (A video of Wonmo sleeping soundly)
[Post] Every time I look at him, I feel peaceful. How can he be this cute?
└ Damn. He really is cute;;
└ I’ll admit it if he’s still cute when he grows up lol
└ Don’t animals grow up fast?
└ Most of them are fully grown within a year, probably?
└ [Wild Grylls]: Hey, you bastards. You want me to stay here for a year?
└ It’s the Forest of Four Seasons. Can you even get out? lol
└ [Wild Grylls]: I’ll have to try. I’m thinking of scouting now.
└ You’re leaving Wonmo alone? What if he gets attacked?
That was true. It was too dangerous to leave Wonmo alone while I went exploring.
I wanted to take him with me, but Wonmo was weaker than I was.
The Fast Sloth had appeared when I went to the river last time, hadn’t it?
Things had turned out fine because I came back quickly, and the Fast Sloth wasn’t hostile.
‘Should I bring Wonmo with me?’
Or there was another option. I could have the Fast Sloth stay in the cave.
Honestly, that was probably best. It would put me in more danger, though.
The Fast Sloth had stopped the chameleon viper from attacking me last time, too.
With its ridiculous dynamic vision and agility, it would be useful while exploring as well.
‘This is tough.’
Should I leave Wonmo behind and go scouting?
Or should I leave the Fast Sloth here?
After thinking about it for a while, I spoke to the thing hanging from my back.
“Fast Sloth.”
“?”
The Fast Sloth slowly tilted its head at my call.
“You need to guard the cave.”
“……”
“If you guard it well until I get back, I’ll give you a Fasting Pill.”
At that, the Fast Sloth crawled down from my back.
It definitely understood what I was saying. That was amazing.
I definitely wasn’t the weird one. The Fast Sloth had to be unusual.
Wonmo understood what I said too, but let’s not dwell on that.
Questions and answers were for when I had time to spare.
When survival was this important, they were just pointless thoughts.
“If Wonmo wakes up, tell him where I went. Got it?”
Nod. Nod.
The Fast Sloth nodded to show it accepted my request.
With a dependable bodyguard stationed here, all that remained was preparing for the expedition.
As always, I only brought Heavenly Demon’s Sword and the Golden Shield.
I also put on clean clothes, the ones I’d washed when I gave Wonmo a bath before.
‘PrincessChaenggu said she’d give me some long clothes later, right?’
I didn’t know how long that would take, but it would probably be soon.
She’d willingly given me such a high-quality uniform, after all.
I packed an Elixir and Fasting Pills just in case. Now all that was left was to go.
‘Should I head this way today?’
I’d been gradually exploring in all four directions from the cave.
To the northeast was the river where Golden Frogs appeared, while the northwest was home to Adult Mandrakes.
Of course, I didn’t have a compass, so I couldn’t know whether those directions were accurate. It was all based on instinct.
This time, I planned to head in the direction I thought was west.
‘I need to be back before lunch.’
After scouting, I planned to get the wall from Passing Dwarf and reinforce the camp.
My overall physical abilities had risen sharply in less than a week.
Manual labor wasn’t particularly difficult anymore. Before long, scouting would become my main routine.
“I’ll be back. Watch the house.”
“……”
As I left the cave, the Fast Sloth slowly waved its hand.
It was clearly telling me to have a safe trip. No matter how I looked at it, it seemed more like a person than an animal.
Chirp. Chirrrp.
It was a direction I’d never explored before, away from both the river and the Mandrake habitat.
The loud chirping of insects pierced my ears, making me tense.
I left marks as I went so I wouldn’t get lost.
‘I can’t trust everything I see.’
I couldn’t let my guard down because of the chameleon vipers.
I struck trees with the flat of my blade and pushed aside bushes as I went. I was as careful as possible.
It would slow me down, but it was safer. Even with Elixirs, I needed to conserve them.
“Hm?”
I was making my way forward when I spotted something on the ground.
It was pitch-black, so at first I thought it was charcoal.
But flies were gathered around it, so it definitely wasn’t charcoal.
‘It’s poop.’
Animal poop. I had no idea what it belonged to.
In civilization, I could have dismissed it as something gross.
Things were entirely different in the wild. Animals tended to mark their territory through their droppings.
This is my territory, so come in and you’ll die. It was a warning sign of sorts.
‘The flies are buzzing around it, so it seems old. Is it from an Owlbear?’
I wasn’t an expert, so I didn’t know whose it was.
For now, I guessed it was from the Owlbear that had been shipped off to America.
Wonmo’s poop looked exactly the same, apart from the size.
Still, asking the gallery was the best option.
‘Should probably put up a gross-content warning.’
I might get banned, so I needed to be careful.
Without lowering my guard, I made a post on the gallery.
[Post title] Mild Gross Warning, Whose Is This?
[Author] Wild Grylls
[Post] (A photo of animal droppings)
[Post] Found this while scouting today. Anyone know what animal it came from?
[Post] If it’s an Owlbear’s, I’ll keep exploring. If it belongs to another animal, I’ll need to think about it.
└ Ah, that’s fucking disgusting.
└ It really took a massive dump lol
└ Mix rice into that and you’ve got yourself a full meal lol
└ Ah fuck, I’m blocking you. That’s disgusting.
└ [Wild Grylls]: Stop talking bullshit. Is it really from an Owlbear?
└ I think so? Only Owlbears have shit that black.
└ Not just Owlbears. Aren’t regular bears like that too?
└ [Allfather]: It is Owlbear droppings. Judging by the size, I suspect it belonged to the one you killed earlier.
As expected of Fatheremon. The only intelligent person among all these idiots.
Since it was Allfather saying it, I could trust it.
I thanked Allfather and continued walking.
I deleted the post just in case. The Head Mod might see it and ban me.
Maybe not if they were willing to be flexible, but the Head Mod was unexpectedly strict about rules, so I was preparing for the worst.
‘It’s surprising Heavenly Demon didn’t comment.’
She probably hated gross stuff too. I could understand that.
Either way, the droppings had been identified as the Owlbear’s, so I could continue scouting.
‘Oh. Wild raspberries?’
I found some delicious-looking berries while exploring.
They were red and plump, and anyone would think they were wild raspberries.
But this was the Forest of Four Seasons. A complete hellscape where even the grass was poisonous.
I’d gotten a bad rash from plants even before coming here, so I decided to ask the gallery before picking them.
I wanted to avoid dying in the wilderness after carelessly eating something.
[Post title] Can I Eat This?
[Author] Wild Grylls
[Post] (A photo of raspberry-like berries)
[Post] They look delicious. Can I eat them?
└ Aren’t those wild raspberries?
└ Do wild raspberries even grow in the forest?
└ Aren’t raspberries supposed to be round? Why are those so long?
└ Try one. Give us a review afterward.
└ [Wild Grylls]: I’m not believing anything you assholes say.
└ Then why ask?
└ [Wild Grylls]: Give me a more proper explanation.
└ [Allfather]: Do not eat them. They are Arisaema berries, which are even used for suicide. They contain a deadly poison.
└ [Wild Grylls]: Thank you;;
└ [Allfather]: Wild raspberries are round, so they should be easy to distinguish.
└ That was seriously close lol
└ What a shame.
└ You seriously need to get banned.
This was why I trusted Allfather. They gave me detailed information like some kind of encyclopedia.
I looked at the raspberry-like Arisaema berries, then crushed them underfoot. It was a kind of marker.
It showed that I had passed this way. Every little thing like this mattered.
‘Should I buy paint?’
It wasn’t a bad idea. It would come in handy when I traveled farther away like this.
I continued making my way through the forest and trees. I didn’t forget to be careful not to get lost.
After wandering for some time, I soon came across something that could serve as a landmark.
“Wow. That’s huge.”
I raised my head in amazement. The sight made my mouth fall open.
There was a mushroom standing right in front of me.
It wasn’t an ordinary mushroom. It was much bigger than I was.
Even gigantic didn’t seem like enough to describe this super-sized mushroom. What the hell was it?
‘It looks like a matsutake mushroom.’
I should probably use this mushroom as a landmark from now on.
I could explore the surrounding area using it as a reference point.
‘The area around it is pretty open. What’s going on?’
Before approaching the mushroom, I checked the surrounding environment first.
No matter how big it was, it was strange that it stood there all alone.
Maybe the mushroom had sucked up the nutrients from every other plant around it.
I needed to find out what it was, so I made a post on the gallery first.
[Post title] Found a Fucking Huge Mushroom.
[Author] Wild Grylls
[Post] (A photo of a super-sized mushroom)
[Post] It’s bigger than me. You can roughly tell by comparing it to the tree beside it.
[Post] Anyone know what this is?
└ Wow. It’s about as big as my dick.
└ Bullshit.
└ Want me to show you?
└ Fuck off, you psycho.
└ [Allfather]: That mushroom is…… You should be careful. It could be a Mushroom Man.
└ [Wild Grylls]: A Mushroom Man?
└ [Allfather]: Yes. It is a creature that combines a monster and a mushroom. They do not usually grow to that size, but I suppose that is because it is the Forest of Four Seasons.
└ [Wild Grylls]: Is it strong?
└ [Allfather]: Honestly, it is not particularly strong. However, it scatters spores, so you will need fire.
Fire. I nodded.
I had the Ignition Stone Heavenly Demon had given me, but there was no need to provoke it.
I wasn’t going to eat the thing, so there was no reason to waste my strength.
I was about to take a wide detour around the mushroom when...
“Hm?”
I realized there was a cave behind it.
The mushroom completely blocked the cave entrance, making it impossible to enter.
What could be inside? I suddenly became curious.
‘It’s not like it’s a gatekeeper guarding some dungeon.’
Curiosity aside, my life was precious.
I’d already faced death several times, so I could give up on that idea easily enough.
Rumble!
But the world wouldn’t leave me alone.
I panicked at the sudden vibration, then realized where it was coming from.
The super-sized mushroom was shaking violently. It looked like it might uproot itself at any second.
‘Ah. Fuck.’
Of course this would happen. I slowly stepped back.
I didn’t have fire, but I planned to assess how strong it was before running away.
Even if I fought it here, all I’d gain was a look inside that cave.
Crack! Crack!
Soon, the ground split apart, revealing the mushroom’s true form.
Allfather had described Mushroom Men like this.
Tiny limbs that were disproportionate to their bloated bodies.
They’d said that even if this one was huge, its proportions shouldn’t be any different.
“Kuuk.”
Not at all. Its arms and legs were long, just like a human’s.
If they were merely long, that would have been fine. But they were also bulging with muscle like a bodybuilder’s.
Its body was a long mushroom, while its limbs resembled those of a human.
It was hideous. Beyond hideous, it was grotesque.
‘……Is that its face?’
It even had narrow eyes near the top.
It really was a shape befitting the name Mushroom Man.
Once again, I felt firsthand that I’d fallen into a fantasy world.
Except this was dark fantasy. What a shitty situation.
“Kuuk!”
The Mushroom Man slowly approached me. It felt hostile.
Like Allfather had said, it honestly didn’t look very strong... No. It looked strong.
Really strong.
Who could see those thick limbs and think it was weak?
Thud!
I got lost in thought for a moment. The Mushroom Man sped up.
It kicked off the ground and closed the distance in an instant.
It looked like it had only taken one step, but it was already right in front of me.
That part was fine. It wasn’t particularly fast.
I could see it and react. It was far slower than the Fast Sloth.
‘Let’s block one attack.’
The Mushroom Man’s right fist shot toward my stomach.
I raised the Golden Shield.
Considering the Golden Shield’s durability and my recently increased strength, I should be able to handle it.
“Kuoooh!”
The Mushroom Man let out a powerful battle cry.
Boooom!
“Gah?!”
A powerful impact struck the shield, and my body was sent flying backward.
* * *
‘Wow. In all my life...’
After running back to the cave, I lamented inwardly as I looked at the front of the Golden Shield.
A clear fist mark had been left on it.
The shield was the only reason I was okay. Without it, I would have died from that one hit.
After that, I ran without looking back. Fortunately, the Mushroom Man didn’t chase me.
‘What kind of Mushroom Man uses Phoenix Smasher?’
I’d expected something from those muscular limbs, but I hadn’t imagined it would be that bad.
If I’d taken that hit without the shield, my stomach would have been punched through.
Or everything inside me might have come pouring out of my mouth.
I sighed in relief and made a post on the gallery.
[Post title] Got Hit by a Mushroom Man’s Phoenix Smasher.
[Author] Wild Grylls
[Post] (A photo of a shield with a clear fist mark on it)
[Post] This bastard used Phoenix Smasher on me, and now my shield looks like this.
[Post] Thank god I had a shield. Otherwise, I would’ve been completely fucked;;
└ Wow. Look at that clear mark;; If you took that without the shield, your stomach would’ve been punched through.
└ A Mushroom Man was that strong? What the hell did it look like?
└ [Wild Grylls]: Its arm and leg muscles were no joke. They were completely jacked.
└ I can’t picture it. Post a photo.
└ [Wild Grylls]: (A photo of a muscular Mushroom Man)
└ LMAO what the hell is that LMAO
└ Wow lol it has a better body than me lol
└ It looks fucking strong lol
└ That’s really a Mushroom Man?
└ [AllHailTheSun]: Why does my shield look like that? It’s supposed to be really durable;;
└ [Wild Grylls]: You’re saying I would’ve died without this? Thank you so much, brother.
└ [AllHailTheSun]: No need to thank me. Still, that’s a little surprising. What the hell were you fighting?
└ [Wild Grylls]: A mushroom.
└ [AllHailTheSun]: The world is a strange place.
└ [Allfather]: How strange. Were there any other unusual traits?
└ [Wild Grylls]: No. All I know is that it’s really strong.
└ [Allfather]: Hmm…… I do not know. I truly do not know what kind of place this is.
Even Allfather didn’t know. The other users could only marvel.
Apparently, this was beyond common sense even by the standards of people in this world.
That showed just how much the Forest of Four Seasons was a land beyond reason.
Then again, a Sloth that could see and snatch arrows out of the air made no sense either.
‘Why was that thing blocking the cave entrance?’
Thinking about how it had guarded the place like a guardian deity made me even more curious.
But the Mushroom Man was far too strong.
A head-on fight was impossible. I would have to use some kind of trick to get past it.
Just as I was organizing my thoughts, I noticed one particular comment.
└ [Heavenly Demon]: An interesting tale. A fist strong enough to dent a shield, even one made of gold. It would not be inferior even when compared to mine.
It was Heavenly Demon. Normally, she was one of the registered users who always left the first comment.
Seeing how late she was today, she must have been busy.
But something else caught my eye more than that.
└ [Wild Grylls]: Hello, Heavenly Demon. But is that really you?
└ [Heavenly Demon]: If you ask whether it is I, then yes. Why do you ask?
└ ?? Why did she suddenly turn blue??
└ Why did she suddenly turn blue?
└ Uh, why’s she blue?
The users who noticed before I did flooded the comments.
Most of them were confused. Naturally.
A blue badge, something I had never seen before, had appeared beside Heavenly Demon’s username.
└ [Heavenly Demon]: Ah. I forgot. Henceforth, call me an assistant moderator.
Heavenly Demon had appeared as an assistant moderator.
Footnotes:
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