WeTried Translations
Translator: [IncomeElastic]
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◈ I Became an Undetected Priest Impersonator ◈
Chapter 34
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I Became a Neighbor (3)
"What do you think you're doing, Goddess?"
-Stuff like this usually comes with a description, so I tried dubbing it.
It was a truly childish, no, goddess-like reason.
Having judged it so, I sealed the mouth of the glass bottle with beeswax.
Then, perhaps wondering about the look of that bottle, the Goddess asked out of curiosity.
-But does the glass bottle really have to be that kind?
"Isn't bigger better? It holds a lot."
-No, it's just, putting it in that bottle somehow makes it look like...
-Dad's homemade liquor or something.
"Hmm."
As the Goddess said, there was admittedly something to that feeling.
‘Sure enough, add a single snake and it'd pass for snake wine.’
It was no wonder I thought so, since the holy water just happened to be rippling in a dandelion-like gold.
"Well, looks aren't what matters."
And it was too late to pull the stopper now.
If I tore open what I'd sealed even with melted wax, the presence I'd gone to the trouble of storing would slowly scatter.
"Then let's get going. He must be waiting anxiously."
Sure enough, the Lord of Limbeld was waiting for me endlessly, too restless to sit still.
I opened my mouth while discreetly handing him the holy water.
-Saying "discreetly handing it over" makes the scene look even weirder.
-Looks like bootlegging.
I ignored that and continued.
"Dilute it in water and have the people of your domain drink a mouthful each. The dilution ratio is..."
I remembered what the Goddess had said as a joke.
Naturally, a swimming pool would be out of the question.
"A hundred times should do it."
Since I'd packed in enough power to cast Purification hundreds of times over, it would hold up to that much dilution at the very least.
But the Lord of Limbeld still wore a face that couldn't let go of its worry.
It wasn't as though I couldn't understand him, so I reassured him with a word.
"If the holy water doesn't resolve it, I'll go myself. So please, don't worry too much."
Only then, seemingly a little relieved, he bowed his head deeply.
"Priest Flowie, I won't forget this kindness."
"It's a bit early for thanks. I just hope things get resolved well."
The Lord of Limbeld set off at once.
As if every moment of dawdling was a waste, he urged the coachman on.
It was then that the Lord, who'd been quietly watching, spoke up, glancing at me.
"But, Priest Flowie. As far as I know, only Water priests can make holy water... is that really holy water? Of course, I'm not doubting you, Priest!"
Strangely, the face of the Lord saying this showed not unease or worry but anticipation.
I had a guess or two.
"If you're thinking of making holy water a specialty product, you'd better drop the idea."
"No way!"
It was when I ignored the Lord, who was lamenting his disappointment, and looked away.
A pile of horse dung I hadn't gotten around to clearing caught my eye in the corner of my vision.
It couldn't be helped that seeing dung brought the Gallery to mind.
‘Come to think of it, I forgot to reactivate it.’
If I opened it late, the Gallery would be covered in dung once more.
That wasn't figurative.
‘…Hmm.’
It was around the time the Tier restored by activating the Gallery was dwindling again.
At that moment I felt a tingling, strange sensation, and the Gallery came to life, feeding on my Tier.
[It's open?!!]
[Any feed dropping?]
[Booo! Rice, rice, rice!]
[●▅▇█▇▆▅▄▇ Lie down first, you fucking idiots]
[Weird, why isn't there a feed notice..?]
[Ook!!! Ooki-ki!!!!!]
[Mom's gift? Mom's gift? Mom's gift? Mom's gift? Mom's gift?]
[Heh heh, what god-tier feature will we get this time.]
Posts started appearing in the Gallery almost simultaneously.
And before long, it turned into a shitshow.
It was because not only was there no feed, there wasn't even a single notice.
Of course, I'd expected that, so I wasn't flustered.
‘The Sub-Admins will handle it.’
That was why I'd given them benefits, so they'd surely do well.
[Head Admin, I didn't know what you'd like, so I brought Greenskins of every kind.]
[
]
[Head Admin, come here and sit.]
[Hot Kobold naughty pic collection]
I turned the Gallery off after the bizarre pics started going up.
‘I should've looked at only the last one before closing it.’
Regret washed over me, but I had no urge to open it again.
Part of it was that I couldn't work up the nerve to look into the Gallery, but I also had something else that needed checking.
‘It'd be nice to have a Sub-Admin in real life to do my work for me.’
But it was literally just a complaint.
What I had to do now wasn't something anyone else could help with.
‘Still, it'd be convenient.’
For some reason Priest Malja shuddered, but it must have been my imagination.
-But what's keeping you so busy?
The Goddess suddenly said, sounding curious.
-The clinic doesn't look that busy, and it's not a weekend with the study class today.
-You only did a shortened evening service too.
"That's because I'm busy preparing your offerings."
-Aah!
I'd said it as a joke, but about half of it was sincere.
Preparing three meals every day in a place with neither a gas range nor a fridge was by no means easy.
But it was only half because of one other reason.
It was because of a certain strange sensation I'd felt just now while reactivating the Gallery.
‘Honestly, I thought there was no hope beyond A-Rank, but to think a path would show up now.’
S-Rank.
A path called the 7th Tier here was coming into view.
Funnily enough, in the process of releasing my Tier and restricting it again, I'd glimpsed the way to the next.
‘Well, the Goddess's help probably played a part.’
Smelling the floral scent clinging to my body, I chuckled.
"So I'll take the day off. Maybe because I made holy water, I'm a bit tired."
"Hm, well, all right. Rest up and come back tomorrow."
Priest Margaret granted it, readily convinced by my offhand excuse.
Priest Malja, who'd been tormented by troublemakers, gazed at that with envy, but for the Acolyte's growth, I pretended not to notice and walked off.
-Poor Malja…
"Someone once said that pain that doesn't kill you makes you stronger."
-Isn't that just torture?
It could be, and it couldn't.
…
I found out the cause not long after returning to the church.
‘Wasn't it said that nobody knows what's one step ahead in life?’
The Demon's words suddenly came to mind.
I couldn't help inwardly agreeing with them.
‘Who'd have thought my Tier was about to rise thanks to the Gallery and the Goddess.’
The reason was that the Gallery had forcibly emptied my Tier and the Goddess's power had refilled it, over and over.
It could only be explained as coincidence stacked upon coincidence.
‘But if that's the cause, all I can do is wait.’
Still, it wouldn't be too far off.
I'd reopened the Gallery to shed my impatience and clear my head.
It was around the time I figured the Gallery, a shitshow by now, had probably been quelled to some extent.
Unusually, the Gallery's attention was focused on a completely different bait.
[Live) What the hell is up with our domain right now.]
It was because of one particular live post.
‘Limbeld? Or somewhere else?’
The broadcast screen was full of people felled by the curse.
As I was guessing the region from the familiar curse symptoms, the streamer's voice reached me.
=My neighbor guy collapsed so I rushed him to the clinic in a panic, but look at this, the whole clinic is full of passed-out people.
=Fuck, what the hell is going on.
=An epidemic, you ask? You fucking think there's an epidemic where everyone drops at the same hour of the same day?
=Quit showing off the tin-can rattle in your head and shut your fucking mouth.
The broadcast was mostly in first-person view.
It was closer to a vlog than a broadcast.
=Anyway, the priest lady is seriously fucking pretty.
=Oh fuck, what do you mean ask for her number.
=Forget that I don't even have a phone, she's this busy, why the hell would I get chewed out for that?
Perhaps the streamer was talking with the viewers through chat, as the muttering to themselves kept coming, but I focused on the situation on screen.
The screen was full of chaos.
‘It's worse than I thought.’
To make matters worse, the cursed patients just kept increasing.
That was when some commotion was heard.
And a moment later, a familiar face burst into frame.
=Everyone out of the way!
=I've brought holy water from a renowned priest!
It was the Lord of Limbeld, who had taken the holy water.
I clicked my tongue quietly at the sight of him.
Because it was obvious at a glance that he'd overexerted himself.
His trousers were frayed and he was limping, so he'd apparently ridden a horse without rest.
The anomaly occurred the moment the Lord of Limbeld was about to open the bottle to dilute the holy water.
Patients who had suddenly opened their eyes all lunged at him.
And right after.
The glass bottle holding the holy water fell to the floor and shattered to pieces.
‘Looks like I'll need to prepare for a house call.’
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