WeTried Translations

Translator: [IncomeElastic]

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◈ I Became an Undetected Priest Impersonator ◈

Chapter 6

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I Became a Priest Impersonator (5)

"Thank you."

I bowed my head calmly.

If I turned it down as unnecessary, it would only give them a reason to be suspicious.

It wasn't as if they could find luggage that didn't exist anyway, so for now it was better to accept the kindness naturally.

It must not have been a bad call, because the Lord looked satisfied as he responded.

"Come to think of it, it's lunchtime. Have you eaten?"

He was the one who'd shown up at lunchtime to ask that.

Of course I hadn't eaten yet, and he surely had a good guess that I hadn't.

What I should say here was already decided.

"It's lunch already? I did feel a bit hungry."

"Perfect timing. The head cook at our manor should be preparing a meal about now, so please come along. It's a short carriage ride."

Honestly, it was a burden.

Fortunately, Margaret cut in at just the right moment.

"Let's just go to a restaurant nearby. You never know when a patient will show up, and who has the time to go all the way to the manor and back?"

"A round trip takes less than forty minutes, though.."

"Eating, digesting, and riding the carriage will obviously eat up two hours, won't it?! Just eat somewhere close!"

"As you say.."

The Lord nodded with a flinch.

He seemed disappointed, but he apparently already knew well that Margaret's stubbornness couldn't be bent.

Still, for the restaurant owner who suddenly had to receive the Lord, it must have been nothing short of a bolt from the blue.

Sure enough.

The moment the Lord stepped inside, the owner's face went deathly pale.

Margaret shaking her head and scolding the Lord at the sight was nothing new either.

"You should just wear a mask when you go out. Everyone gets scared."

"Now wait, what exactly is wrong with my face? They're just flustered because the Lord came to visit, aren't they?"

"You really think so? Flowie, you tell him."

Suddenly the arrow had turned toward me.

"That's a difficult question."

"See?"

"…"

I'd mumbled my answer, but anyone with any tact couldn't possibly miss the meaning.

‘He seems like a good lord, though.’

His face just happened to be eating up all his good points.

‘Well, everyone has at least one flaw.’

Priest Margaret, meanwhile, sat down as if used to it and placed an order.

"Owner, three of the usual."

"P-Priest Margaret. All three of you, the same thing?"

"What, is there anything else on the menu here?"

"..I'll have it ready right away."

The owner vanished into the kitchen as if fleeing.

Watching that, the Lord asked with a grimace.

"Surely not that dish again, Priest Margaret?"

It seemed that, as a noble, he was put off by the food ordinary townsfolk ate.

‘So he does live up to his face, after all.’

But that assessment vanished completely the moment the food came out.

No, if anything, I ended up agreeing.

‘No wonder the Lord was horrified.’

The dish that arrived looked just like pig-slop stew.

In reality, it wasn't much different.

At least, that was what the people in the Gallery said.

Title: What on earth is this food?

(Photo)

[Ugh, this might as well be a shit pic]

[Eternal Stew?]

[Bottomless Porridge ㅋㅋㅋㅋ]

ㄴ[Literally, when the pot runs low they keep adding water and more ingredients so the contents never shrink, which is why it's called Eternal Stew or Bottomless Porridge]

ㄴ[With a color like that, they've probably kept it boiling for like 5 years without turning off the fire ㅋㅋㅋㅋ enjoy your meal]

‘So it's at least edible.’

Though I didn't want to eat it.

While I was examining the bowl with a troubled heart, I spotted a huge hunk of meat in the stew and brightened.

It wasn't that I was happy to see meat.

I'd brightened because I'd found an excuse.

"I'm sorry. I can't eat meat, so I don't think I can manage this stew."

"Does the Church of the Flower Goddess have a doctrine against eating meat?"

"No, I just don't eat meat myself."

"My, what a hard way to live. No wonder you're so skinny."

Margaret clicked her tongue and ordered some bread instead.

The bread that came out was dry and hard, as if it had been made a good while ago, but it was surely better than eating that hodgepodge porridge that had been simmering for years.

"Um, Priest Margaret."

"What now?"

"The truth is, I can't eat meat either.."

"Cut the bullshit."

"Yes, ma'am."

The Lord kept glancing enviously at the bread I was eating, then finally scooped up a mouthful of stew.

His expression eased quickly, though.

The taste itself apparently wasn't as awful as expected.

‘Well, if it's been boiling that long, hygiene aside, the savoriness must be top-notch.’

Not that I wanted to put it in my mouth.

"Oh, right, Priest Flowie."

After emptying a few spoonfuls, the Lord suddenly spoke up.

"About building the church. Is there any plot of land you have in mind?"

Come to think of it, he had mentioned building me a church at our first meeting.

I'd been lost in other thoughts and hadn't listened properly, but any ordinary priest would have welcomed that offer with open arms.

But it was a gift that, at a glance, would give me a stomachache if I took it, so I shook my head and declined.

"A church isn't necessary. Instead, if you could put up a small statue of the Goddess somewhere in the city, that would be enough."

That should have been an appropriate answer for a priest.

But the Lord looked thoroughly dissatisfied.

"Just a single statue? Surely you need a place to stay too, Priest."

What's more, he wasn't the only one pushing back.

Margaret set down her spoon, looking dumbfounded as well.

"He's offering to build you a church for free, so take it. What's all this refusing bullshit?"

Honestly, Margaret's remark couldn't help but surprise me.

After all, this city was very much the home turf of the Church of the Earth Goddess.

"Wouldn't it be inconvenient for the people of the Earth Church if another faith's site went up in the city?"

"No need to worry about that."

Margaret scooped a spoonful of stew as if it were nothing.

"Besides the church's operating costs and the priests' salaries, all the donations we receive go straight up to headquarters anyway. Even if donations drop, HQ will send whatever's short, so we've got nothing to lose."

"I see."

This wasn't so much a church as a Catholic parish.

The Lord brightened at Margaret's unexpected support.

"That's right. And Priest Flowie! The Earth Goddess and the Flower Goddess are mother and daughter, aren't they? The Earth faithful will welcome a Flower Church too."

‘For someone who looks like that, he's surprisingly well-versed in theology.’

In the end, I had no choice but to raise the white flag.

Refusing to the bitter end would only look stranger.

On top of that, if there was no friction with the Earth Church, my biggest worry, there was no reason left to be stubborn.

"In that case, I'll gratefully accept."

"That's a wise decision, truly!"

The Lord's face broke into a bloom of smiles.

The stew he'd been spooning down reluctantly a moment ago seemed to taste like honey now, and he even lifted the whole bowl to drink it.

‘Still, a church, huh.’

I'd planned to quietly take shelter with the Earth Church once my theology studies were done, but things were taking an unusual turn.

‘It shouldn't be difficult. The citizens won't leave the familiar Earth Church to come over here.’

But at that moment, I had no idea.

How naive that thought was.

…

The Lord left right after the meal, saying he had a pile of backed-up work.

After seeing him off and returning to the clinic, Margaret waved a hand at me.

"Now then, you may as well head back too."

"Is that all right?"

"Word that the Lord came has already spread, so no patients will come today. And if an urgent one does, I'll be here."

Margaret thought for a moment and added.

"Still, tell me where your inn is before you go. Just in case."

"All right."

I put on a show of reluctance, but inwardly I thought, perfect.

There was still a lot of doctrine and scripture I hadn't memorized.

On top of that, I needed to learn the writing here too, so this unexpected free time was welcome.

So I went back to my room at the inn, opened the Gallery, and was studying when,

Knock knock.

The knock came from low on the door, so it had to be the inn's little girl.

My guess was right.

I opened the door and saw the child.

But her expression was not what I'd expected.

Her face was scrunched up, as if she might burst into tears at any moment.

"What's wrong?"

I asked the reason, quite flustered, and the child finally burst into tears and told me.

"My brother got hurt. Sniff.."

‘Hm.’

It was a rather familiar situation.

Even in my old world, once the neighbors learned I was a healer, they'd show up at all hours asking me to look at their injuries.

It wasn't a memory I missed.

"Is he badly hurt?"

Shaking off the stray thoughts, I asked how bad it was.

"Yeah.. there's a lot, a lot of blood."

Apparently there was no time to waste.

With the child leading the way, I hurried to the room where Sean was.

But when I saw Sean's actual condition, I could only sigh in deflation.

‘The "lots of blood" was a bloody nose from both nostrils.’

…

"Wait outside the room for a bit. I promise I'll fix your brother."

"Okaaay."

After sending the child out, I approached Sean.

"Looks like you got into a fight."

"…"

There was no response.

He kept his head down, staring at the floor.

"Won't your mother worry if she sees you like this?"

Only then did Sean reluctantly lift his head.

His face was a sight.

Blood streamed from both nostrils, and one eye socket was ringed with a livid bruise.

It was more accurate to say he'd been beaten one-sidedly than that he'd fought.

"How did the fight start?"

I assumed he'd thrown punches over some trivial reason.

But the answer that came out of Sean's mouth was not what I'd expected.

"That bastard called me a future orphan bastard."

"Hm."

"They said my dad's a mercenary and that my dad's gonna be orc barbecue soon.."

‘Fair enough to fight over.’

Even Priest Margaret would have thrown a punch over a remark like that.

After being speechless for a moment, I reached out toward Sean's face.

A radiant light spread, the nosebleeds stopped, and the swollen eye socket quickly settled down.

"You fought well. Even if you lost."

"..They're a year older than me. If we were the same age, I would've won."

True, at that young age a year is no small difference.

If anything, I found it rather admirable that Sean had gone after someone a whole year older.

Maybe that was why.

I said something out of character.

"Want me to teach you how to fight?"

Sean thought for a moment, then asked back.

"But Priest, do you even know how to fight?"

..That was a rather grating remark.

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