WeTried Translations

Translator: [IncomeElastic]

Discord: https://dsc.gg/wetried

◈ I Became an Undetected Priest Impersonator ◈

Chapter 7

──────

I Became the Gallery's Head Admin

"At the very least, I'd fight better than your average soldier."

"Really?"

I was confident I was better than the soldiers who got beaten up by orcs and the like.

But the answer seemed to surprise him, because Sean's eyes lit up.

"Then do you know swordsmanship too?"

"Swordsmanship?"

"My dad won't teach me because he says it's dangerous. My dad's really good at swordsmanship, though. He learned at the swordsmanship guild for three whole months once."

I wondered whether "three whole months" was really something to brag about, but there was certainly a difference between having learned and not having learned.

Even someone who'd mastered a single move would be better off than someone who knew nothing.

The only problem was that I knew how to deal with monsters, but not swordsmanship.

"I don't know swordsmanship."

"Huh?"

Disappointment was written all over Sean's face.

"Not even a little?"

"Not even a little."

No matter how often unexpected situations came up inside the Tower, a healer had no business running around swinging a sword.

"I could teach you some bare-handed fighting instead, though."

"Eh, that's okay."

"..All right."

But Sean shook his head and turned it down.

As if bare-handed fighting, unlike swordsmanship, didn't appeal to him much.

Never mind that he had no idea how precious the opportunity that had just rolled into his lap was.

…

As soon as I got back to my room, I opened the Gallery again.

With the small problem taken care of, I meant to get back to my theology studies.

[Azure Mage Tower Deputy Tower Master Executed on Charges of Demon Summoning Research]

[NSFW) Elf Body Is Insane]

[Is the Gallery on a potato server? Why's it lagging so bad]

"Hm?"

But a few of the posts that showed up when I opened the Gallery were too much for my curiosity, and I clicked one.

Maybe because of the attached photo, it took a little while to load.

Title: NSFW) Elf Body Is Insane

(A meme pic of a scrawny, green-skinned, two-legged monster in a bikini)

[You son of a bitch]

[Fuckingswearyoubetternevercrossmypathonthestreet]

[Armband!!!!!!!!!]

‘Hm, so elves are some kind of monster that looks like an orc?’

I lost interest soon enough and went to my reading list in the info tab.

‘Even finding my place again is a pain.’

The text was long, so tracking down where I'd last stopped was quite a hassle.

If there had been a search function it would have been different, but there wasn't, so I could only stop scrolling once I was nearly at the very end.

‘Still, I've read almost all of it.’

The content had already reached its final stretch.

All those bits of time I'd squeezed in whenever I could had paid off.

With so little left, I figured I'd finish it before dinner tonight, and I was about to move on to the next sentence when,

-Gallery use is restricted due to an unstable server.

‘..That's a problem.’

The Gallery server, which had been stuttering for a while now, had finally crashed like a potato server.

Luckily, the post I'd already opened seemed fine, but I wouldn't be able to open any other info posts until the server was restored.

‘Can't be helped. I'll just do something else while the server recovers.’

Of course, that was after I finished the post I was reading.

Slide, slide.

I scrolled down slowly, reading through the transcribed scripture.

Even though I was careful, there was so little left that the scroll bar hit bottom before long.

Next, the old comments at the end of the post came into view.

I had finally read all of it, every bit of the scripture.

‘So all that's left is studying pan-theology, which covers the twelve religions?’

I already had the doctrine of the Church of the Flower Goddess memorized, interpretation aside, so if I just studied general theology, I'd be able to pass as a priest convincingly enough.

But theology study would have to wait until the Gallery server was restored.

-503 Service Unavailable

I tried clicking another post on the off chance, but all I got back was an error message.

I closed the Gallery without regret, since the server clearly hadn't recovered, and got up.

There was still time before dinner, but I figured I'd be better off doing some kind of work than lying around idly on the bed.

‘Come to think of it, there's a church here.’

While looking for something to do, the Church of the Earth Goddess suddenly came to mind.

A church would surely have at least one theology book, or failing that, a related scripture.

And considering that the Earth Goddess and the Flower Goddess were mother and daughter, even another religion's scripture would surely help.

‘It's better than doing nothing, at least.’

It felt like a hassle and a bother, but if I thought of today's trouble as paying for tomorrow's ease, there was nothing I couldn't do.

"Priest, it's almost dinnertime. Where are you going?"

"I'm stopping by the church. I'll try not to be too late, but if I am, could you save me a loaf of bread?"

"Okay!"

Seen off by the inn's little girl, I headed outside.

I didn't know which way the church was, but finding it wasn't hard.

Religion took up a bigger share of daily life than I'd expected, so even on weekdays it was common to spot people heading to church.

Put simply, I'd tailed them.

As I stepped into the yard, I saw the back of a priest who was sweeping.

I was walking closer to speak to them when the priest, perhaps sensing my presence, turned around first.

"Have you come to pray? Wait, that outfit.."

The priest looked me over and their eyes went wide.

"Flower patterns! Could you be Priest Flowie?"

‘News sure travels fast.’

But that was actually a good thing.

It meant I didn't have to ramble through some long introduction and convince anyone.

"Yes, I'm Flowie, a humble servant of Iris, the Flower Goddess. I was hoping to read the scripture of the Earth Goddess church, if that's possible."

"! Please, come in. I'll show you the way."

The priest volunteered without a moment's hesitation.

"You're welcome to borrow one and take it with you, if you like. We transcribe them often, so we have plenty of spares."

Sure enough, the bookshelves inside the chapel were packed with transcribed scriptures.

Enough that no one would notice if a single copy went missing.

I bowed my head in thanks for the priest's cheerful generosity in lending me the scripture.

"Then I'll gratefully borrow one."

"Of course. Iris is Gaia's daughter goddess, after all."

‘So even religions care about bloodlines?’

It was a blasphemous thought no real priest would ever dare to have.

"Please, read at your leisure."

The priest bowed and left the chapel.

With the one person who might disturb my studies gone, I opened the scripture in peace.

And immediately, I had no choice but to stare.

‘..I can't understand any of it.’

And I mean that literally: not a single word made sense.

Unlike the Gallery posts, which had been translated into Korean, the scripture's text was written in the original language.

I could piece together a few words by recalling the pronunciation guide from when I'd carved my name into the symbol, but even a single page took a good while.

‘Guess I'll count this as language practice too.’

In the end, I tucked the Earth Goddess scripture into my coat and stood up.

I planned to take it back to the inn and read it slowly, with plenty of time.

On my way out, I happened to meet the eyes of the statue of the Earth Goddess standing in front of the chapel.

I held her gaze for a moment, then gave a small nod.

"Please don't be too angry with me."

It's not like I wanted to impersonate anyone, either.

Confessing an excuse no one was there to hear, I left the church.

By the time I got back to the inn, the sun had long since set.

I thanked the inn's little girl for saving me a meal despite my late return, and I was filling my empty stomach when a message in a familiar font blocked my vision.

-The Gallery server has been temporarily restored.

‘Just in time.’

Still, I couldn't help being bothered by the word "temporarily."

‘The admin will handle it.’

It bothered me, but as an ordinary user, there was nothing I could do about it.

I set aside the pointless worry and focused on the rest of my meal.

I turned the Gallery back on after finishing a satisfying dinner and being left alone in my empty room.

"..?"

The temporarily restored Gallery was ablaze over some fresh bait.

And skimming through the posts, I saw that this was a problem the Head Admin could never have solved in the first place.

No, it would be more accurate to say they couldn't even attempt to.

[From now on, Kyaru rules this place]

[Head Admin dead?? What the hell happened]

[The Azure Mage Tower Deputy Tower Master was the Head Admin???]

[And what's this about closing the Gallery]

[People live here!!!]

[Our deepest condolences to the deceased.]

[No next Head Admin??]

.

.

.

[Gallery Closure Notice]

The one I hurriedly clicked was the newly posted notice.

Title: Gallery Closure Notice

Author: Gallery System

The death and absence of the administrator serving as the server have been confirmed.

A temporary server has been activated and will run for 24 hours. If no new administrator is appointed within that time, the Gallery will be permanently closed.

If you wish to back up any posts, we recommend copying them out by hand.

Only then did I understand what the fuss was about.

I was sighing and wondering where I could find paper or wooden boards to copy things onto when,

-A user who meets the conditions has been detected.

-Would you like to become the Gallery's administrator? (Y/N)

-Time remaining until closure: 23 hours.

"Hm."

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