WeTried Translations

Translator/Editor: HidingTurtle

Discord: https://dsc.gg/wetried

◈ I Became the Ophidian of the Apocalypse ◈

Chapter 34: If There Isn't Any, It Can't Be Helped

──────

The goblins of the Runga Tribe fell into two groups.

A small minority of fools who believed I was the incarnation of the legendary snake, Ululullulu.

And the majority who thought that was complete nonsense.

The ratio was probably around two to eight.

Honestly, even twenty percent was higher than I expected.

The Ululullulu depicted in their drawings was a flying black snake.

The only thing we had in common was that we were both snakes.

"Ululullulu!"

"Ah, Ululullulu."

Every time the goblins who believed I was Ululullulu saw me, they shouted that name and pressed their palms together.

It made me feel like a Buddha statue on the side of the road.

I looked into why this misunderstanding had happened.

The old shaman goblin I met at first had definitely said that snakes were mystical animals.

The Runga Tribe genuinely did not treat snakes carelessly.

Maybe that was only natural.

The belief that snakes were evil animals was the prejudice of some ignorant people.

In some places, snakes were worshipped as gods of abundance.

On Jeju Island in Korea, people once worshipped a snake god called Chilseong, or Seven Stars.

This place was similar.

The shamans prayed to many goblin gods.

Among them was a powerful snake god called Ululullulu.

A mighty snake god who defeated the evil god known as the Red Headless Snake.

I asked why they thought I was that snake god.

Of course, saying I "asked" made it sound simple, but the process had been anything but.

I pretended to be interested in the shamans' scriptures, and one shaman spent an entire day reading them to me.

That was how I roughly figured it out.

First, the mystical snake god Ululullulu understood goblin speech.

Ordinary monsters and animals naturally could not understand language. Ululullulu, who understood the goblins' words, was kind and gentle.

Ululullulu stayed with the goblins of Runga and defeated their enemies, a being worthy of their gratitude.

Yeah, that one was me.

There was no denying it. It was basically a description of me.

Kind, gentle, and I had even eaten several hearts from goblins of hostile tribes.

Second, Ululullulu spat out the Water of Life.

The Water of Life healed the injured, and anyone who drank it would remain healthy and live a long life.

What was the Water of Life?

Some goblins had shouted Ululullulu when I made potions. This was why.

To goblins who did not know what potions were, they must have looked like the Water of Life.

But I had not spat them out. I boiled them with Nanaruk's help.

Drinking water spat out by a snake was disgusting.

The claim about living long and never falling ill was funny too.

Pelerian's potions did not do that. They only healed wounds.

-Hmm, there was something I never told the buyers when I sold potion recipes.

'What?'

-Long-term use can cause an illness.

'...What?'

When I asked what illness it was...

-Ahem, azoospermia.

Terrifying.

Did that mean women could drink it without a problem?

Pelerian was impressive too, selling them while hiding that fact.

-They would not even know they had the condition. I only discovered it by accident while researching Chimeras.

That sounded like fraud through willful ignorance.

More importantly, Pelerian had researched Chimera sperm?

Calling Pelerian a mad scientist was not even remotely an exaggeration.

-A Chimera capable of reproduction was my dream.

Ah.

That was why Pelerian had researched it.

A Chimera capable of reproduction did sound incredible.

Was that not practically the same as creating an entire species?

The conversation had drifted off track.

Anyway, I was not Ululullulu.

I was not particularly happy about being mistaken for some snake from an old tale either.

-Why not? It is a good opportunity. Heh heh...

Pelerian's sly smile made me dislike the idea even more.

According to the legend, Ululullulu eventually died.

Ululullulu fought the Red Headless Snake and won, but was exhausted and wounded in the process.

In the end, Ululullulu leaped into the flames and ascended to the heavens.

In other words, Ululullulu died.

'What if those goblins throw me into a fire alive?'

Nothing was scarier than fanatics.

I had actually met one in my previous life.

A friend had approached me first, despite my extremely limited social circle.

I wondered why they were so nice.

They were so nice that they even worried about my ancestors.

They said my ancestors were full of resentment and clinging to me, which was why nothing went well for me.

They told me a five-million-won exorcism ritual would fix everything, so I mentioned it to my dad and got beaten half to death.

When I apologized to that friend, they immediately dropped the act and dragged me to a mountain prayer retreat.

I escaped barefoot, then got in trouble because I did not have money for a taxi.

'Anyway, I don't like it.'

-You could turn those foolish goblins into your followers and use them as meat shields.

I ignored Pelerian.

At least normal goblins like Nanaruk did not mistake me for Ululullulu.

"Um, Snake God."

When I ignored the goblins who called me Ululullulu, the goblin who approached me used the title Snake God instead.

Fine. I could let that much slide.

"My child is sick."

The goblin woman held her child out to me.

The child looked seriously unwell.

It seemed to be an illness.

"Please... Sob..."

What was I supposed to do?

Go find a doctor or a shaman.

Still, my heart was too soft to ignore a crying mother.

-That is obviously dehydration. They probably drank filthy water, came down with diarrhea, and could not eat properly.

Fortunately, PelerGPT was beside me.

Pelerian's remote medical care was excellent.

-They will recover if they boil a meat soup with clean water.

You heard that, ma'am.

"Sob..."

But I had no way to convey those words.

I could not hand out potions either.

Oh, whatever.

I swung the tail wearing my ring.

My subspace backpack contained all kinds of things.

I could not store much because its space was limited, but I had emergency rations.

Chunks of crocodile tail meat popped out.

"Th-This is..."

Both the baby and the mother were painfully thin.

Even if the goblins got along well, some of them still went hungry.

*「You use Beginner Elemental Magic: Water Lv. 1.」

I was not firing a water cannon at the poor goblin.

A stream of water began trickling down from empty air.

The goblins stared with their mouths open.

"When Ululullulu roared, rain fell from a clear sky..."

"It is Ululullulu!"

Of all people, there was another shaman among the spectators.

Swoosh!

I had not roared, and this was not rain.

The goblin woman looked back and forth between me and the stream of water, then took out a leather waterskin to collect it.

"Holy water... Thank you."

It was just water.

Still, it had to be a hundred times better than scooping up muddy water to drink.

It was clean, after all.

"Ululullulu shall spit out the Water of Life and heal the sick..."

"Ululullulu! Ululullulu!"

That crazy shaman.

Would I get experience if I ate them?

It might not be bad to test it once.

I fled from the gathered crowd.

But once a preconception took hold, it was frightening.

After that, several more incidents happened where goblins mistook me for Ululullulu.

Snakes had something called a Jacobson's organ.

It was another olfactory organ inside the mouth, capable of detecting the scent of chemicals picked up by the tongue.

That was why snakes kept flicking their tongues.

As a monster, I had a Jacobson's organ too.

And that Jacobson's organ gifted me with a special ability.

The ability to sense rain before it fell.

I was lazily basking in the sunlight to raise my body temperature. The goblins were hanging out laundry because the weather was nice too.

Then I smelled rain.

Since snakes were ectotherms and did not do well when soaked by rain, I hurried beneath a roof.

Rumble.

A thunderstorm poured down immediately after.

"Ululullulu commands lightning and rain..."

"Ululullulu!"

It was absurd.

Why would a snake that commanded thunderstorms hide under a roof to avoid the rain?

Pelerian laughed loudly, clearly enjoying this.

Pelerian seemed to like being worshipped.

I was the one being worshipped, though. It was not like they were worshipping Pelerian.

There was another incident too.

Before heading to the Dungeon, I went hunting to level up.

While I was out, I successfully caught a large bear.

It was an Owlbear that looked exactly like an owl.

I could not carry it alone, so I called some goblins to help move it.

One of them saw the Owlbear and screamed.

"Aah! Aah!"

I flinched.

It turned out the Owlbear had eaten that goblin's father.

"That is the one! I am sure of it!"

"Ululullulu!"

"Thank you. Thank you so much!"

Was it really that Owlbear?

I could barely tell goblin faces apart, so I did not know why they were so certain.

I was getting a little tired.

I seriously asked Pelerian why they were acting like this.

-Goblins are simply that kind of race.

It sounded like something a racist would say, but I listened quietly.

-Goblins instinctively seek someone to believe in and rely on. They are diligent, so they obey well. They are born to be ruled.

'That is a bit harsh.'

-I am not insulting them. It is simply true. The world has two sides. Goblins are loyal and faithful, perhaps even better than humans. They simply need someone to believe in and follow. Pitiful creatures...

That was what Pelerian said.

Either way, I had no intention of ruling over them as their snake god.

The day I would leave was approaching.

-A good idea. They would make excellent slaves, but if you do not want that, you should head to my Dungeon as soon as possible.

My level had already passed 5.

I still could not use Heavenly Thunder Decree, but I had potions now. It was time to get moving.

What if the goblins really looted the Dungeon?

I returned home.

Yes, I had a home here.

It was Nanaruk's house.

I climbed up a pillar and slipped in through the window.

Nanaruk's younger brothers greeted me.

"Whitey!"

"You're back."

Maybe Whitey was better than Ululullulu.

They did not call me Snake God and pester me.

Is your sister not back yet?

"Big Sis is getting scolded by Father. She'll be back soon."

I was startled that they answered as if they had read my mind.

Nanaruk's father was the chieftain here.

If you thought about it, that made her something like a princess. I never would have guessed, considering how well she fought with a sword.

But she seemed to have a poor relationship with the chieftain.

It was nearly dark when Nanaruk returned.

"Letch, Riyandal, Kadiram, I'm home."

Nanaruk had three younger brothers.

Letch and Riyandal were still children. Kadiram was a warrior who had evolved into a Hobgoblin.

She greeted me too.

Huh.

Nanaruk's face was a little swollen.

Had she been crying somewhere?

Her oblivious younger brothers did not seem to notice.

Nanaruk did not show any sign that she was different from usual either.

Everyone in the household was present, since the house was home only to Nanaruk and her younger brothers.

We shared dinner together.

It was a soup made from unidentified monster meat.

After filling our stomachs, it was time to sleep.

They had laid down something soft like straw in one room, spread blankets over it, and slept together.

Nanaruk's younger brothers fell asleep almost instantly.

Moonlight streamed through the window.

Today was my last day here too.

Pelerian entered the ring to rest.

In truth, Pelerian spent more time inside the ring than awake.

I enjoyed the rare silence.

Honestly, I was almost tempted.

Staying here did not seem so bad.

The goblins treated me well, and it was comfortable.

But I should not do that.

The fairy trackers could arrive at any time.

If they did, the goblins here might be put in danger too.

I had to grow stronger.

I looked at Nanaruk.

She was sleeping peacefully.

Thank you too.

Take care of yourself.

I should leave as soon as dawn broke tomorrow.

I closed my eyes and tried to sleep too.

I hoped I would have a nice dream tonight.

But I did not.

Good grief, I met that crazy elf woman in my dream.

The elf woman raised a short sword and cut me into pieces like grilled eel.

'It was a dream! Phew...'

When I opened my eyes, my body was unharmed.

But my heart was still pounding.

Only then did I realize the cause of the nightmare.

Survival Instinct, my friend, had warned me of danger.

A Hobgoblin stood in the room.

Their face was covered by a mask, and they held a sword.

An assassin about to stab Nanaruk to death.

I moved on instinct.

*「You use Stealth Lv. 6.」

*「You use Acceleration Lv. 5.」

I approached silently and swiftly.

Then I bit down hard on their ankle.

"Gasp!"

The assassin goblin stared at me with a startled breath.

Hello.

Do you happen to have Venom Resistance?

Footnotes:

Join our discord at https://dsc.gg/wetried