WeTried Translations

Translator/Editor: Hydrogen B.

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Chapter 41: 041

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It was a little late to mention it, but.

I had never flown on a plane.

Twenty-seven years of walking the dirt-spoon path.

I had never even taken one of those ordinary overseas trips.

I had never even gotten a passport...

I, Baek Jiho, was born a purebred dirt spoon through and through.

Yet there I was, floating hundreds of meters above the ground.

It felt surreal.

Me, someone who had never boarded a plane.

Who would have thought I'd get to see the sky like this?

"Wow. Nice view."

The scenery around me drew an automatic gasp of admiration.

An endless forest stretched out below.

My field of view was vast.

Even the refreshing wind brushing against my skin felt incredible.

It was like my chest had opened up.

What a strange, wonderful experience.

"Hyeji. Fairies really are amazing."

"Seriously... I never imagined we could fly like this either."

"Iing! Iing!"

The fairy puffed out her chest and raised her shoulders at our praise.

I had thought she was no more than a scouting drone.

Who knew she had such a useful talent?

That was how we flew through the sky, carried by the fairy's telekinesis.

The flight was fast and comfortable.

All we had to do was sit still and let ourselves go, and we would automatically arrive at our destination.

Tesla's self-driving system had nothing on this.

Elon Mengsk, are you watching?

You only succeeded at autonomous driving for cars.

I succeeded at telekinetic autonomous flight!

Fairy autonomous driving had completely crushed AI autonomous driving!

I might have lost in wealth and attention-seeking power, but I had pulled ahead in technology.

It was a monumental first victory.

Anyway, we quickly headed for our destination.

Before long, we spotted it.

"An Orc Shaman... an Orc Village. About a hundred of them?"

An Orc Village stood in the middle of a dense forest.

An Orc Shaman was in the center of the village.

Around the huts, roughly a hundred Orcs lingered.

From so high up, those Orc bastards looked as tiny as ants.

Then.

Thump. Thump.

My heart began to race.

I was excited.

"It's time for the Flying Archmage!"

I possessed overwhelming firepower.

Air Bullet, Wind Cutter, Fireball, lightning, and more.

I had the means to sweep away large groups of enemies.

What if I mercilessly rained my powerful magic down from the sky?

Khh!

Just imagining it made coolness and majesty pour out of me.

Floating proudly in the sky.

Raining magic down upon the insects on the ground.

Grinding up hundreds of Orcs!

Wasn't that the very image of an archmage from a fantasy story?

"No. That's not it."

I shook my head as I imagined it.

Flying Archmage felt a little cliché.

Besides, wizards flying around while fighting didn't really fit recent trends.

Wasn't there some new concept I could use?

I was getting a little tired of the martial arts concept.

I needed something different for a change of pace.

Then it hit me.

"Ah."

The image of a certain weapon flashed through my mind.

It was as if a lightbulb had switched on, illuminating my thoughts.

I spoke to Hyeji in a serious voice.

"Hyeji. I identify as an attack helicopter."

"What? What are you talking about all of a sudden?"

Hyeji looked bewildered by my random declaration.

I continued with a solemn expression.

"Since I was young, I've dreamed of flying over oil fields and dropping bombs on disgusting foreigners. Ordinary people treated me like a lunatic because they said a person becoming a helicopter was impossible... but I don't care. Because I'm beautiful."

"...What kind of nonsense are you about to say now?"

"With magic, I possess a rotor wing (fairy), a 30mm autocannon (Air Bullet), and AGM-114 Hellfire missiles (Fireball). From now on, call me Longbow Apache and respect my right to needlessly kill monsters."

"Ugh."

"If Hyeji can't accept me, then you're helicopter-phobic. Think carefully about what you get to enjoy in life."

"Sigh."

Hyeji let out several deep sighs after my long speech.

It seemed she found it hard to accept my identity.

How could someone be so un-PC!

What an uneducated person...!

Wait, did Hyeji not know the attack helicopter meme?

I thought it was pretty famous.

Tch.

Either way.

As the Extreme Lunatic Hell Attack Helicopter, I had to bring shock and terror to the insects below.

I prepared lightning magic.

'I'll snipe the Orc Shaman first. It'd be annoying if it interferes with lightning magic.'

The Orc Shaman's lightning magic had considerable range, so it remained dangerous even from far away.

Of course, I could scoff at its attacks and endure them.

But if Hyeji or the fairy got hit, it would be fatal.

It was best to snipe the Orc Shaman first.

Crackle! Crackle! Crackle!

I prepared a Lightning Orb and aimed at the distant Orc Shaman.

Krrrrrr-boom!

Then I fired.

A blue streak shot down from the sky.

It crossed the vast distance and struck the Orc Shaman.

Crackle!

"Kruk...!"

Thud.

The Orc Shaman became a crispy-on-the-outside, tender-on-the-inside Garrosh and collapsed limply.

A faint trail of smoke rose from its body.

Lightning magic had far greater range than Air Bullet.

It was perfect for sniping distant enemies.

I looked down at the fallen Orc Shaman and muttered quietly.

"No matter how accomplished a martial artist may be, they cannot defeat modern weaponry. What a pity, Orc Shaman. In the Central Plains, you might have had the talent to contend for the title of Greatest Under Heaven. Yet you were born in the modern age... and so you perished this futilely before the power of an attack helicopter."

"Iing Iing, don't learn from him after seeing that. Okay?"

"Iing Iing?"

The ordinary person and the fairy chattered about something.

I didn't react.

I was the Extreme Lunatic Hell Attack Helicopter.

A cold-blooded killing machine.

So I didn't care about the mockery of civilians.

As a weapon, I would only tear apart and crush every enemy caught on my radar!

I gave an order to my pilot, Iing Iing.

"Iing Iing. Lower our altitude. Let's go down to around fifty meters."

"Iing!"

Hummmmmm...

Our altitude slowly dropped, and the distance to the Orc Village steadily closed.

I could see it clearly now.

"Woah?! Woah!"

"Woooooah?"

The Orcs were panicking.

It made sense.

A bolt from the blue had literally struck down and killed their leader, the Orc Shaman.

They probably had no idea what had happened.

I prepared my next attack.

"Hellfire missile (Fireball)."

I loaded Fireballs.

Whoosh! Whoosh! Whoosh! Whoosh! Whoosh!...

Dozens of Fireballs rose into the air and orbited around my staff.

I had prepared a total of thirty Fireballs.

That was more than enough firepower to wipe out an Orc Village of a hundred Orcs.

I lowered my staff and muttered quietly.

"Die."

Whoooooosh!

The Fireballs tore through the air.

They plunged into the mass of Orcs and exploded.

Kabwaaaaaang!

The roar of the explosion thundered through the forest.

A mist of blood burst outward.

Chunks of flesh scattered everywhere.

Over a dozen Orcs were caught in the blast and torn to pieces.

"Woah! Wooooah!"

"Woooooooh!"

The Orcs screamed and ran around in confusion.

They looked around frantically, their faces filled with shock and panic.

Yet they still hadn't found me.

I snickered.

"Idiots. I'm in the sky, not on the ground. You're searching the ground like your lives depend on it. Well... you probably can't even imagine a person floating over your heads."

Even after lowering our altitude, we were still quite far away.

They couldn't possibly imagine an attack helicopter above their heads.

That was why they couldn't tell where the Fireballs had come from.

Even if they knew my position, nothing would change.

What could infantry trudging around on the ground do?

The nightmare of ground forces.

The grim reaper of ground combat!

They could never dare oppose an attack helicopter!

I continued firing Fireballs.

Whoosh! Whoosh! Whoooooosh!

Fireballs streaked out one after another.

Their shriek cut through the air.

Nearly thirty Fireballs struck all across the Orc Village.

Kabwaaaaaang!

Kwang!

Kwakwakwakwa-boom!

Explosions erupted one after another.

Each time, countless Orcs were caught in the blasts, torn apart, shattered, and blasted into pieces.

They died in droves.

"Kraaaaaah!"

"Woooooooooh!"

"...!"

Intense blasts and tremors erupted in succession.

Explosions soared up all around.

The Orcs were torn to shreds.

Their blood sprayed in every direction, while body parts and chunks of flesh flew high into the air.

The Orc Village was reduced to ruins in an instant.

Hoo...

Thick clouds of dust rose.

We landed in the center of the Orc Village.

I slowly looked around.

The Orc Village was, as expected, a complete mess.

Not a single hut remained intact. Every one had been completely smashed apart and lay scattered across the ground.

Orc corpses and body parts littered the area.

The ground was soaked in blood.

There was no sign of a living Orc.

The enemy force had been completely annihilated by the overwhelming firepower of this Extreme Lunatic Hell Attack Helicopter!

As expected of an attack helicopter.

The grim reaper of ground combat.

"Hyeji, there aren't any surviving Orcs. Please collect the loot."

"Okay."

Na Hyeji and the fairy began collecting the loot.

One ordinary person and one fairy darted through the completely devastated Orc Village, searching through its wrecked huts.

It was completely different from our usual loot collection.

That was thanks to Iing Iing.

"Iing Iing, help me!"

"Iing!"

Whoosh.

The fairy shot through the ruined Orc Village at high speed.

Using telekinesis, she pulled the loot from beneath the wreckage in one go.

Then, plop, plop, plop, it went into the Spatial Bag Na Hyeji held.

Hyeji could collect loot simply by standing in one spot with the Spatial Bag open!

Look at that effortless freeloader...!

"As expected of a summoner. What incredible one-click power...! Summoners really are absurdly overpowered!"

The fairy did everything for her while she stood still!

This was one-click gaming in its purest form!

The very personification of one-clicking!

Could a wizard live without feeling robbed after seeing that?

I went through all kinds of hell, preparing magic, firing it, and fighting desperate, intense battles.

Over there, she could run everything on automatic mode.

What was I supposed to do with this sense of relative deprivation?

Those one-click freeloaders were always the problem!

"What are you talking about? Jiho, you're the last person who should say that! You're the one who gets everything handed to you!"

"Sure, says the one-click freeloader."

"...You really have no conscience."

We traded pointless remarks while collecting loot.

The loot collection was incredibly fast and efficient.

Thanks to the Magnet Pet of my Magnet Pet, Na Hyeji's Magnet Pet, Iing Iing, working so hard, we collected everything in only a few minutes.

But what even was a Magnet Pet's Magnet Pet?

It wasn't like this was subcontracting on top of subcontracting.

Anyway, we had finished off one Orc Village.

"All right. Now that we're done collecting the loot, let's head straight to the next place."

"Okay. Iing Iing, please."

"Iing Iing!"

We began finding and killing the remaining Orc Shamans.

The process was simple.

First, we took to the air with Iing Iing's telekinesis.

"Justice rains from above!"

Kwakwakwakwakwa-boom!

We quickly ground down the Orcs with Hellfire missile (Fireball) bombardment.

"Iing Iing, let's collect the loot!"

"Iing Iing."

After that, Na Hyeji and the fairy quickly gathered the loot.

Thanks to telekinesis, even the loot from a hundred Orcs took only five minutes to collect.

"All right. On to the next location! Takeoff!"

"Iing Iing!"

After collecting the loot, we boarded Iing Iing's telekinetic flight and moved toward the next prey.

This process repeated over and over.

Everything fit together perfectly.

The fairy's excellent scouting ability, the mobility provided by air transport, and the rapid looting enabled by telekinesis.

Combined with my overwhelming firepower, the sequence of target designation, movement, destruction, and collection flowed as smoothly as water.

I had no choice but to admit it again.

'Fairies are incredibly useful. Who knew slaughter could be this efficient...'

Her combat power might have been weak, but her utility was tremendous.

She was the perfect support!

Thanks to her, we could grind down enemies incredibly quickly and conveniently.

We moved rapidly from place to place.

We destroyed not only the Orc Villages that contained Orc Shamans, but every other Orc Village we came across.

After roughly an hour.

We had exterminated every Orc on Floor 16.

[Baek Jiho (Republic of Korea: Floor 16)]

[You have completed Tower Floor 16.]

[You have defeated 789 Orcs (10).]

[You have defeated 53 Orc Warriors (100).]

[You have defeated 5 Orc Shamans (300).]

[Points are being calculated.]

[Tower Floor 17 has been unlocked.]

[Returning.]

Footnotes:

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