WeTried Translations

Translator: Hydrogen B

Editor: Hydrogen B

Discord: https://dsc.gg/wetried

Chapter 339: By the Name of Azzyberos

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Wow. Would you look at that. I was dreaming.

Ordinary people even put the prefix "dog" before dreams to strip those disorderly fantasies of meaning. But I knew better. Quite often, dreams were not merely nonsense.

Sleep was when human consciousness was at its weakest. When the signals running through the nerves weakened, the noise that slipped through the gaps became dreams. Too many things were painted over them to make out clearly, but at their center lay the roots of an unconsciousness one had never even recognized.

Well, most people never found those roots, which was why they became nonsense dreams...

Mine was a little different.

The memory that had wormed into my mind while I slept. Fill a room? Whose memory was this?

"Woof! Woof woof!"

"Wake up! Wake up!"

A dog's barking pierced my ears. I frowned with my eyes still closed at the sound interrupting my thoughts. Nonsense dreams were better than dogs. At least nonsense dreams did not wake me up.

"Azzy. Stop barking."

Of course, words were not going to stop her. Azzy thumped the bed and shouted.

"Wake up! It's morning!"

"Lazybones!"

"I'm not lazy. I'm waging a holy struggle against the cruel morning that seeks to rule humanity."

"Lazybones!"

"You should be diligent!"

She was not even the King of Chickens, yet she woke me every morning without fail. Tch. I had been hoping to get a proper night's sleep for once. Beasts were worse than humans, I swear.

Fine, I'm getting up. I'll think about that dream later. What had I dreamed about again? It definitely felt like nonsense.

"Ugh. Why are you singing in rounds, anyway?"

I opened my eyes as I said that, only to find two Azzy heads lined up beside my pillow, staring at me.

I screamed in fright.

"Cerberus!"

"Woof! It's me, Azzy!"

"Cer... food?"

"It isn't Cerberus. It has two heads! A two-headed hound?"

"I only have one head!"

"Idiot!"

"I don't want to be called an idiot by a puppy with two heads!"

What was going on here? I had opened my eyes to find Azzy duplicated. Had the King of Abandoned Dogs wandered in somewhere? This was a problem. One was already a handful, and now there were two.

I was about to use mind reading on instinct when I hesitated. Right. My opponent was the King of Dogs. All I could read was what Azzy showed outwardly. There was no point even trying...

'Look at that surprised expression. How precious~.'

I could read it? What was going on? Had she gotten trapped somewhere, eaten something wrong, and become human? Or had my mind reading awakened?

'Even Father, who normally shows no openings at all, looks quite defenseless while sleeping~. The King of Humanity has supposedly lost all his power, but does he truly have no means to protect himself? This needs further observation!'

What? "Azzy" was Hilde.

Tch. For a moment, I thought I had entered another growth phase too. Then again, there was no way a human could read a dog's thoughts. I could understand them without reading them, though.

Should I try just once?

'Wake him! Woof! Wake him! Woof!'

Ugh. As expected, I could not read her.

I did not need mind reading to know that Azzy was trying to wake me. Yet all I could read with my mind reading were Azzy's moods and actions. Even that was so muddled that it was not worth reading.

She seemed to be trying to do me a kindness. Though letting me sleep would have been kinder at a time like this.

"What is it? Why are you making so much no... Huh?"

The regressor, who had drawn back the curtain with an irritated look, saw the duplicate Azzy and opened her eyes wide. I propped Azzy's face on my hands and said,

"Ta-da. Azzyberos."

"It has two heads!"

Was that really important? Ignore the little details.

"Woof woof! Stop right there!"

"Woof woof woof!"

Unlike the other humans, Azzy showed no particular wariness toward an "Azzy" who looked exactly like her. Instead, when "Azzy" scampered around, she wagged her tail furiously and ran after her. The two played tag, narrowly avoiding knocking over any furniture.

"Maybe because there are two Azzys, but they're four times as rambunctious."

"One of them isn't Azzy. It's a Shadow Casket pretending to be Azzy."

The regressor grumbled as she watched Azzy and "Azzy" play.

"What kind of person does that? She puts on dog ears and a tail, then runs around like a dog? There are limits to bad taste... What? Why are you looking at me like that?"

"That applies to Azzy exactly as you said it. Wearing dog ears and a tail and acting like a dog is just Azzy herself."

"What are you talking about? Azzy is the King of Dogs! What's wrong with the King of Dogs acting like a dog?"

"That's strange. Didn't you treat Azzy like a human, Shei? You made a huge fuss about me treating Azzy too roughly when I played with her. You complained when I tried to give her leftovers. Yet wearing dog ears and a tail and acting like a dog is natural? Isn't that a contradiction?"

Honestly, treating a dog like a human seemed more problematic than a human acting like a dog. If you were going to treat a dog like a human, then make it fulfill the corresponding responsibilities and duties. If it did no work, had no use, yet received every kind of treatment, was it a pet? No, it was a master.

"The King of Dogs represents dogs. Of course she should do what dogs do!"

"Then do you admit that Azzy merely takes human form, while her essence is a pure dog?"

"I admit..."

The regressor swallowed the words she had been about to say, then shouted again.

"...I don't! That doesn't mean I can treat her like an actual dog!"

"Good grief. You're stubborn."

When the regressor raised her voice, Azzy stopped playing and tilted her head in interest. "Azzy" followed her over as well.

Tch. Was Hilde planning to keep this form until someone figured her out? She really did have bad taste. It would seem suspicious if I singled her out immediately, so should I make her expose herself?

"Azzy."

"Woof!"

"Woof!"

Azzy and "Azzy" answered side by side. I had checked before, but I could not distinguish them by voice either. I had not expected Hilde to imitate even the tone of a dog's bark so perfectly.

"Azzy. Doesn't it feel strange to have someone who looks exactly like you right in front of you?"

"Woof? Exactly like me?"

"What?"

Azzy and "Azzy" tilted their heads together. Ah. Right. I had not thought of that. Azzy was a dog, so she probably did not look in mirrors much or care about her reflected appearance. They even smelled different. To Azzy, "Azzy" was simply a human acting similarly to her.

"All right, Azzys. From now on, I'm going to conduct a simple test to determine which of you is the real Azzy."

"Woof? Toast?"

"Food?"

Sigh. Expecting a dog to understand dignity and uniqueness was too much. I should stop talking and finish this quickly.

Among the food the regressor had brought out were dried fruits. I took a dried persimmon and tore off a small piece. The large dried persimmon had the rich aroma one would expect from the regressor's food, and it caught Azzy's attention. When I waved it from side to side, Azzy's and "Azzy's" eyes followed my hand.

I shouted.

"Azzy. Sit!"

"Woof!"

"Stand!"

"Woof!"

"Good girl! Here, eat!"

"Woof woof woof!"

When I tossed the piece of dried persimmon upward, Azzy and "Azzy" jumped for it. After their contest in midair, Azzy was the one who claimed it.

Azzy chewed the dried persimmon with loud smacking sounds, then opened her eyes wide and smacked her lips. She swallowed it in an instant, her eyes shining as she bounced in place.

"Delicious! Sweet! Delicious!"

"Tasty, right? It's dried persimmon. I hid it because I was afraid there wouldn't be any left for me once you tasted it."

From now on, Azzy would steal my fruit every time I ate any. Repeating that sad fact to myself, I looked at "Azzy."

'Ugh. The King of Dogs is simply difficult to imitate. How am I supposed to steal that? This is going to give me away too easily~.'

No matter how easy the King of Dogs seemed to deal with, she was still a king. Hilde could not easily match her agility. Still, I had laid the groundwork. It would not be strange to distinguish Hilde now.

"Want some? Go ahead, if you can eat it."

I tore the dried persimmon into small pieces and hid them in both hands. Then I parted my fingers slightly to leave a gap and held them out toward the two.

"Woof woof! Woof woof woof! Dried persimmin!"

"I told you, it's dried persimmon."

Azzy shoved her snout between my fingers without a moment's hesitation. When the gap proved too small for her mouth, she stuck out her tongue to try and get the persimmon. When that did not work either, she simply licked it with her tongue.

'...Hmm. It isn't impossible to imitate, but...'

The original was showing the model answer right in front of her. Come on, Hilde. You had to imitate it, right?

There was a slight hesitation, but Hilde slid her tongue into my hand with little outward difference. It was impossible to tell by sight, but the sensation against my fingers was clearly different. Azzy was uninhibited, while Hilde's tongue carried a hint of reluctance.

'It is an emotion an actor should not have... but perhaps I am a little embarrassed?'

Come to think of it, humans were quite peculiar. They were animals too, yet they felt that strange emotion called embarrassment.

"...You really have terrible taste too."

I ignored the regressor's muttering. If she did not want to watch, she could close her eyes.

As both my hands grew wet with saliva, Azzy began chattering her teeth, apparently growing impatient. Startled, I opened my hands to reveal the pieces of dried persimmon. Azzy and "Azzy" devoured them in the blink of an eye.

"Sweet! Delicious!"

"Delicious! Delicious! Delicious!"

Look at those reactions. Feeding them was rewarding. After swallowing every bit left in their mouths, their eyes naturally turned toward the remaining dried persimmon. I held up the fruit, now reduced to half its size.

"Do you want more?"

"Woof! I'm hungry!"

"I'm hungry now!"

"Ha ha. But what should I do?"

In the brief moment I crossed my hands, I hid the dried persimmon inside my sleeve. After a few meaningless hand gestures, I spread my palms wide and showed them to the two.

"Ta-da! The dried persimmon is gone!"

"Woof?!"

Azzy looked as though her world had collapsed. Even a child would have known it was sleight of hand, but the King of Dogs had no immunity to this kind of magic. If it vanished before her eyes, she believed it was truly gone.

Hilde, who had been slow to act because she did not know that, coolly assessed the situation.

'If she is the King of Dogs, she will know the dried persimmon has not disappeared by its scent. I was late until now, so I should take the lead this time.'

"Azzy" lifted her nose and sniffed. Hearing the sound, Azzy began sniffing too.

Then, as though they had agreed beforehand, both looked at me.

"It's there! It didn't disappear!"

"I smell dried persimmon!"

Following Azzy's earlier example, "Azzy" immediately shoved her head into the gap in my sleeve. Her face could not fit inside, so she tried reaching in with her hand instead.

The dried persimmon was already tucked deep inside, though. The bulge at my sleeve was blatantly obvious. Pretending to trace the scent, "Azzy" sniffed as she climbed along my arm. She got closer and closer to the dried persimmon, but a single thin layer of clothing stood between "Azzy" and it.

'It's too deep. I can't take it out without tearing the clothes, can I? What would the King of Dogs do in this situation...?'

At a loss, "Azzy" watched Azzy from the corner of her eye, hoping to get a hint.

Azzy was happily enjoying a feast with an entire dried persimmon in her mouth.

'What?'

"Ta-da. There were actually two dried persimmons."

I had put one in my pocket beforehand.

If the premise was false, every statement following it was false as well. A magician's trick had to begin by twisting the premise. There had never been just one dried persimmon, and Azzy, with her keen sense of smell, had immediately known. While "Azzy" was distracted, Azzy had already taken a dried persimmon from my pocket and begun enjoying it.

Which meant that "Azzy," who had practically climbed into my arms and buried her face against my chest, was proof that she was Hilde.

"Azzy" looked at herself again. At herself perched on me, pushing her nose against me and sniffing away.

Like a broken machine, "Azzy" stopped moving. I took the dried persimmon back out of my sleeve and said,

"Hilde."

"...Woof."

"No matter what, this is a little embarrassing, right?"

"...Yes."

"What are you doing? Come back."

"Azzy," no, Hilde, slowly rose to her feet. Perhaps the shock had hit her hard this time, because the tips of her ears had turned slightly red.

Hilde scratched the back of her neck with an awkward expression.

"Ahaha. I was completely had~. As expected, Father cannot be beaten."

"Don't be too disappointed. The person solving a quiz has an overwhelming advantage over the person making it. You really did look like a puppy."

"That's a compliment, right?"

"It is. Here, a gift. The dried persimmon you wanted so badly."

I shoved the dried persimmon I no longer wanted to eat into Hilde's mouth. Hilde shot me a glare, then sampled it as though dissatisfied. Being hidden in my sleeve had not changed the taste, so Hilde soon brightened.

"I thought being the King of Dogs would make it easy. It was my miscalculation."

"Hold your head high. There is nothing embarrassing about being found out by me. No one else would have figured it out. Right, Shei?"

The regressor, who had been silently watching, gave a start before answering.

"...No, I noticed a long time ago too."

'It's confusing when I look normally, but with the Seven-Colored Eyes, I can see it clearly. Seven-Colored Eyes, Green Eye, open.'

The regressor looked at Hilde with green eyes. The Green Eye was an eye that saw through things. She could not see through a body filled with energy, but the regressor had found another use for it.

'Yes. Just as I thought. The Green Eye cannot see inside a body, but... it can see the material of clothing. Azzy's clothes are an ordinary standard-issue shirt, but the Shadow Casket's clothes are a special clothing packet. The reason the Shadow Casket can change outfits must be that specially made clothing packet.'

It made sense. Even if Hilde transformed, she could not transform her clothing as well. When she had transformed into Tyr before, Tyr had personally fashioned clothes for her out of darkness, but Azzy did not even know what she was wearing.

No matter how capable Hilde was, she could not carry every kind of outfit in the world. Instead, she used a special clothing packet that could become every kind of clothing in the world. An alchemical piece of equipment that could become clothes, weapons, gear, or even puppy ears and a tail, depending on how it was made.

General's Armament, Thousand Transformations.

It looked like a superior version of my card, but Hilde was the strange one for using energy to make molds. If I tried it, my qi and mana would be exhausted every time I transformed it.

'The ears and tail are attached to the skin too. She seems to be using a bio-terminal as well. I have no choice but to admire that transformation technique... Though there is no reason for me to learn it when I have the Mask of Agartha.'

Even while looking for a chance at a fortuitous encounter, the regressor shook her head and said,

"Why do you keep making these ridiculous quizzes? You get found out every time anyway."

Why was Hilde making quizzes? Did she not know something so obvious?

"Shei, you really don't understand."

"What?"

"The reason people make quizzes is obvious. They make them because they want someone to solve them."

Because she wanted someone to recognize her.

No matter how she transformed. Even if she imitated someone else. She kept testing people because she wanted them to recognize who she was. I could not believe I had to explain something so obvious. Shei still had a long way to go.

The regressor listened to my kind explanation, then tilted her head and asked, apparently still confused.

"I'm asking why we have to solve them."

Perhaps regression took sensitivity as its price. Not wanting to bother explaining, I ignored the regressor and went to eat dried persimmons. I needed to taste one too.

I removed the stem from one dried persimmon and tore it in half. A sweet aroma rose from the long strips of flesh. I savored it fully with my eyes and nose, and just before putting it into my mouth, a thought reached me from across the room.

'So that is it. I wanted someone to recognize me.'

It was Hilde's thought. Hilde had stopped chewing her dried persimmon, lost in thought as she repeated what I had said.

'That I am here.'

Footnotes:

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