WeTried Translations
Translator/Editor: ZERO_SUGAR
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◈ SSS-Class Revival Hunter ◈
Chapter 184: Rookie Actor (2)
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2.
The Earth Spirit Tribe has a very fine custom.
The strongest one is always right.
If you have a complaint, talk with your fists, not with your tongue.
"First, let's clean up. Seniors."
And here, I'm the strongest one.
“Look at the state of this theater. What is this? Are cobwebs interior decorations? Are you decorating with mold? Good grief, look at that rotten stink wafting everywhere. This place is a garbage bin. If a customer walks in, they’ll mistake themselves for food waste.”
-But... However...
"Are you stronger than me? Are you a better actor? Do you handle Aura better?"
-No...
"Then pick up a mop, seniors. We're not amateurs. Practice for the Cave Fire Drama, or whatever it is, comes after the environment is set. The environment reflects the state of your mind. If the theater is a trash can, what does that say about your minds? Now, are you going to pick up the mop or not? Do you want to get hit?"
I wasn’t one to make empty threats about hitting someone.
A gentleman does not make threats. He simply beats people.
I provided a punch massage service to the particularly lazy Hobgoblins.
"Do you want to be hit again?"
The actors reluctantly picked up the mops with sullen faces.
Their faces said, ‘We thought an easy-to-push-around elf had joined as our junior, but it turned out to be a tiger.’
"Being damp is good. That's an Earth Spirit trait. But who likes rotten water and stench? That's just laziness. And if you excuse it with 'Earth Spirits naturally like dampness' or 'true actors don't care about the environment,' everything around turns into a mess. Are you dogs, seniors?"
-But, junior. Aren't you being too harsh...?
"Ha. Still no words of remorse? So you are dogs. From now on, when I say something, you answer 'Woof.' Understood?"
-Woof...
"Speak up!"
-Woof!
“Good. Equip the mops in your hands. As you clean the theater, you will each cleanse your own heart. Scrub hard until the bastards lurking in your hearts run away. Understood?”
-Woof!
For two days straight, we did nothing but mop.
The one-eyed actor tirelessly moved between the well and the theater with a bucket.
"Senior, don't just mindlessly draw water. Pretend you’re a noble's servant. Immerse yourself in the role. What a precious opportunity! Clean thoroughly, drive away the inner dogs, and get comfortable with the role of a servant. Killing three birds with one stone."
-W-woof...
The one-armed actor scooped out stagnant water and dug up rotten soil from the theater floor.
“There is a reason pointless busywork is called ‘shoveling.’ It is the height of absurdity. Congratulations. You are experiencing the absurdity of three thousand sixty-year cycles for free.”
“Imagine it. Right now, you are a warrior on the battlefield. You lost an arm in the war, understood? The fighting is so fierce that the commander will not let you rest even after losing an arm. You have to build palisades and dig moats. Constantly. Refusing to retreat from the battlefield is a warrior’s duty, but does shoveling even after losing an arm truly count as being a warrior? No. It is simply filthy.”
-Woof... Filthy...
“Duty is beautiful. But when circumstances reach certain extremes, it can cease to be beautiful. There are moments when duty becomes ugly and virtue becomes filthy. At such times, the more faithfully you fulfill your duty, the stranger everything becomes. Strange filth. Filthy strangeness. That is absurdity. Dig, senior. Bail out the water. Keep shoveling diligently while doubting whether you are a warrior, doubting all the while.”
-Waaah, digging...
The one-eared actor followed my instructions perfectly.
"Did you throw out the trash?"
-Woof, junior.
"Now, let's make new chairs out of logs. Ready?"
-Woof
"Chairs for guests. Let's say the Cave Fire Drama lasts an hour. Guests won't stare at your face for an hour straight, but their butts will be on the chairs. In this theater, the only thing serving the audience from start to finish is the chair. If the chair is uncomfortable, so is the play."
-Woof. I understand the importance, junior.
"Let’s make some spanking new chairs together today. While we're at it, let’s make both regular and special seats.
-Woof woof. Loyalty.
And then,
The director was good at catching spiders.
-Now... Ssonia, I may be just the director, but...
A very severe curse.
-Upon reflection, it’s wrong to have bugs roaming around! I’ll clean them up right away!
[The members of the troupe 'Mud and Dust' submit to your authority.]
[The troupe 'Mud and Dust' recognizes you as the real power!]
Even after the big clean-up, I didn't stop.
Guided by the voice of the Tower, I thought of more improvements.
-Um, Ssonia...
"Yes?"
-May I ask what you're doing with that ladder? Or should I say, may I inquire?
I climbed up the entrance with a ladder, radiating Aura from both hands. Right in front of me was a signboard engraved with 'Mud and Dust.'
"As you can see, I'm changing the signboard."
The Hobgoblin director was startled.
-Changing the signboard?
"Yes. A 130-year tradition is great, but frankly, our troupe is at the very bottom. We need a name that actively appeals to the audience, rather than something seemingly cool like 'Mud and Dust.'"
I flipped over the worn-out signboard.
The blank backside.
I etched letters into the wooden board with my Aura-infused nails.
"Okay. Looks cool."
I admired the new signboard I created.
[The Dog Noise Troupe]
-......
The Hobgoblin looked back and forth between my face and the signboard.
-Um... Ssonia?
"Speak."
-Still, Dog Noise? We have a 130-year tradition...
"I've heard from the seniors. Director, you owe quite a bit to the elf trading companies, right?"
The director flinched.
"Every fortnight, at least one elf comes to press for debts."
-Those bastards, telling everything to the junior...
"Tradition isn’t always admirable. You need to take responsibility for your people first. You’re the owner of this troupe. You need to attract customers, gain popularity. The actors shouldn’t be sleeping in the dressing room; they need proper lodging. Right?"
-......
"I'm an elf. I know business better than the goblins. We need to attract even one more customer right now. If we continue like this, the troupe will collapse."
I walked out onto the streets, flyers in hand.
"The Dog Noise Troupe! Next Saturday evening at the Dog Noise Troupe, witness the fiery sword dance!"
-Woof.
Passing Hobgoblins chuckled.
Even Elves from other troupes promoting their plays laughed.
-What's that? Dog Noise?
-Who's this kid?
Good. A reaction. Better than complete indifference.
Now the tide has turned. It’s my role as the promoter and ticket seller to steer this in a positive direction.
"Woof! Woof! Come witness the banquet of Dog Noise, unseen and untasted anywhere else in this city! Tired of 'Flame Emperor was actually a good guy'? Think bad guys should be truly bad? Come on over! Ah, there's no bigger bastard in the world! The true scoundrel is coming to you!"
-Ugor.
-Elves really are amusing.
-That slender little one is cute.
-......
The director, who had followed me, stared at me blankly.
When a small crowd gathered, I decided to unveil my secret weapon.
"Listen up, brave warriors! This isn't your everyday Fire Drama!"
I snapped my fingers.
Ding-!
A lively sound echoed through the air, startling the passersby.
-What was that?
The source of the sound was simple. I had sent two streams of Aura to collide with each other, creating a piano-like note through the vibration of the air and Aura.
Quite a complex Aura manipulation, but not difficult for me.
"Expect great things!"
I continued to create sound waves with my Aura.
Even I, a music novice, could imitate this tune - Chopsticks March.
“Come now! Even the elf selling tickets can manipulate Aura this well! The Dog Noise Troupe! Just what kind of Cave Fire Drama approaching divine skill could they be preparing?”
Under the bright sky, in the sunlight-filled streets, I played the melody with nothing but my fingers.
It was effective.
-An air-rending sound?
-Incredible. How can that be?
-Is that sound really made with Aura...?
Finally, the passersby stopped and focused on me. Not just the bystanders, but also the ticket sellers from other major troupes were stunned.
“At the Dog Noise Troupe’s performance, there will not be a single line of dialogue! The Flame Emperor! Kekerkker! No one will speak a word! Fire does not speak. It only burns! Witness the first dialogue-free Cave Fire Drama in history!”
-No dialogue...?
The Hobgoblins gawked at my flamboyant hand movements.
-Can a Fire Drama really exist without dialogue?
-Well, not saying a single word seems...
People were astounded by the Aura performance and suspicious of the no-dialogue advertising.
[How can she do that?] and [That can't be true] - the best two emotions for advertising mingled in the air at the crossroads.
"If the actors utter even a single word, we will give a full refund! One word equals a full refund! Two words, double the ticket price! Three words, and I'll give away all my wealth!"
I cheerfully handed out flyers to the people.
"This isn't your everyday Fire Drama! Bring this flyer and your companion enters for free! One free companion per person! Free admission available! Not just a show, but a chance to earn money! Thank you! Yes, thank you!"
The people had no strength left to refuse the flyers I handed out.
They absent-mindedly received them, as if intoxicated by a strong scent.
The flyers quickly ran out.
"Thank you! Until the day of the actual play, I will perform here every day! Of course, the concert is free! Oh no, our theater director is deep in debt to the trading companies! They're desperate!"
I grabbed the director's hand firmly.
The director looked a little startled but docilely let me hold their hand. When the pedestrians’ gazes converged on us, they even managed a clumsy smile.
Good.
“What special qualification makes a great actor? No one delivers a greater performance than actors driven to the brink of bankruptcy! None of them even have homes! Now the stage is truly all they have! It is the academic consensus that acting ability and the state of one’s wallet are inversely proportional! I will appear in the Dog Noise Troupe’s performance as well. Next Saturday evening. Showing next Saturday evening! Thank you. Dog Noise! Next Saturday evening!”
I bowed to the crowd.
The director, whose hand was still in mine, naturally bowed as well.
There was no applause or cheering, but the atmosphere wasn't bad. It was great, in fact. I scattered my salesman's smile, taught by the Black Dragon Master, and quickly left the street.
-Wow.
The Guardian Spirit behind me muttered.
-Aren't you embarrassed?
‘What's there to be embarrassed about when doing my job?’
-You're the Vice-lord of the Demonic Cult.
‘The Demonic Cult was established by farmers and miners who were driven out or fled. What's wrong with handing out flyers on the street? This is also work.’
-Really... You could be dropped in the middle of a jungle or desert and still survive. The Flame Emperor did well to release someone like you into the world.
-Kekerkker...
The elf Ssonia, now just a soul, seemed unable to decide how to react.
A mix of admiration and self-deprecation, like a half-and-half chicken.
-You're amazing, but, how should I put it, so different from the Kekerkker I imagined... Or is this more like the real Kekerkker...?
Exactly.
This is me.
Later, after leaving the street, the director spoke up.
-Are you serious?
"About what?"
-About the no-dialogue Fire Drama. How can you not speak a single word on stage?
"Of course, I'm serious. Do you think I would lie to prospective customers?"
-But...
"Don't worry. I'll do everything in my power to make it worth the entry. If it doesn't work out, I'll take the stage alone. You don't have to worry about lying to the audience."
-......
“More importantly, there is something to do. By now, the new chairs should be lined up throughout our theater. Pick out only the VIP seats, the special seats, and make proper tickets for them. Set the price at twelve times that of a regular seat.”
-Twelve times?
The director was astonished.
-That much...?
“The flyers have already been spread everywhere. Nine out of ten people who come will be carrying one. That means we’ll have an enormous number of free guests, so we need to make up the missing revenue through the special seats.”
-B-but isn’t that too expensive?
"Expensive, yes. But only those who don't mind the price will buy them."
Ding.
I lightly produced a sound with my Aura.
“You watched me manipulate Aura back there. A warrior with a competitive streak will want to watch my performance from as close as possible, so they can observe and learn.”
-......
“For a [guest coming to see a performance], the price is excessive. For a [warrior coming to learn Aura], it is cheap. We will draw in the former for free and make our profit from the latter. Trust me, director, and gouge the price.”
The next day.
Around noon, three or four Hobgoblins began hovering outside the theater.
-Is this the Dog Noise Troupe?
-I heard there's a show next Saturday. I want to reserve front row seats.
-Is that elf in the play? I want tickets to a play featuring that elf.
Despite the price, the Hobgoblin warriors easily bought the seats.
After selling VIP tickets to four individuals, the director looked at me in disbelief.
The director had probably never seen anything like this since opening the theater.
"How about that?"
I smiled warmly.
"My words were right, weren't they?"
Two days later.
All VIP seats were sold out.
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