SSS-Class Revival Hunter - Chapter 188

WeTried Translations

Translator/Editor: ZERO_SUGAR

◈ SSS-Class Revival Hunter ◈

Chapter 188: Flame (3)

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In the Earth Spirit Tribe, there exists a word for 'everything.'

About one thousand years ago, a word was born that encompassed every joy, anger, sorrow, and delight, embracing and tending all creation from life's tender happiness to its agonizing wounds. Whether happy or sad, the Earth Spirits came to utter that same single word without fail.

-Fuck!

Today was a day that made a lot of people say, "Fuck."

-It was just getting good! It was getting really fucking good! Goddamn, fucking pieces of dog shit!

The one-eyed Arika spat out vulgar curses.

The other actors also vehemently expressed their outrage.

-Right. How can they interrupt us, especially at the climax!?

-It's not just about refunding the audience. We should get refunded too. How much we've been beaten up for today's performance. All our efforts have been trashed because of this.

The senior actors grumbled.

Their irritation about the interrupted performance, and more than anything, their anger over the broken 'immersion,' was significant.

-But, we had to move upon receiving the report....

The Hopgoblin law enforcement officer sweated profusely.

It must have been frustrating for them too. Who would have thought? In a world where crazy reports are commonplace, to receive a report mistaking a play for reality.

-It wasn't just one or two people. Exactly five people simultaneously made the same report.

And it was a report with high credibility.

-Five reports of arson and indiscriminate murder at the same time, how could we not respond...

-So, you're saying it's our fault?

-Well, maybe if you had acted a little less realistically...

-Is that supposed to be an argument, or is it bullshit?

Being told that was bullshit by members of the Bullshit Troupe, the officer looked aggrieved.

"Alright. I understand the situation of the law enforcement," I said.

We had come to the police station for an investigation.

Though it was clear we were not guilty, an investigation had to be conducted for formalities' sake.

In one corner of the station hung a sign reading, [Preemptive restraint is better than judgment after the fact.] Was that the officers' official motto?

"Still, we'll be claiming compensation. We have to at least break even. We can't just live off dirt. I know you law enforcement officers didn't know, but our troupe is really in a tough spot. If this performance had failed, we were close to shutting down."

-Ugh...

The officers looked dismayed.

They had already completed their investigation about me.

Everything from [Can you really manifest Aura resembling flames?] to [Do you have the skill to flip a theater upside down with Aura?] and [Is it true that you can freely play music with Aura?].

Of course, it all turned out to be true.

I had demonstrated Aura myself at the police station.

The officers' gazes at me were mixed with astonishment, as if wondering, 'Where did this monster drop from?'

"But," I smiled slyly.

"As I said, I understand your position. So, if you agree to just one condition of ours, I'll only take a minimal apology fee."

-A condition...?

"I'll give you complimentary tickets to the VIP seats. Please come to our next performance."

The senior actors turned their heads sharply to look at me.

-Junior! What kind of nonsense is that!

-To give away VIP seats for free when we should be milking every penny!

-I think that's not quite right, Junior.

Ah, these seniors really don't know how to do business.

I grinned.

"Ahem."

-......

Just like that.

The actors who had been grumbling fell silent. Then they sneakily glanced at me. After a week of hellish training, the seniors had learned when to press and when to hold back.

"Where was I? Oh yes, inviting to the VIP seats."

The officers looked at me with a strange expression.

The sight of full-grown Hopgoblins calling a delicate Elf 'Junior! Junior!' was, well, like a young mafia master surrounded by his henchmen. Whatever it was, it certainly wasn't ordinary.

"We invite the law enforcement officers to our troupe. Formally. I know you're all very busy, but if even four or five of you could make the time to come, we'd be grateful. Then we'll really take only the bare minimum of the apology fee."

-Why...

The officer seemed confused.

-I mean, that's fine by us. But why would you formally invite us?

I slightly lowered my eyebrows.

Trying to look as pitiful as possible.

"It's just... seeing you officers getting scolded by the audience at the theater, it broke my heart."

-Ugh? It broke your heart?

"Yes. You were just fulfilling your duty as law enforcement. Thinking about how you might be getting scolded everywhere else, I wanted to do something for you.... We are actors, after all. I thought it would be nice if you could come and watch the performance and find some comfort...."

This was the killer expression that Raviel praised as "like a wet puppy's eyes, subtly tickling the edges of the heart." I even got my head patted four times for it.

Sure enough, the Hopgoblins were moved.

-This is unbelievable.

-What kind of elf is this? Is he an angel?

-We stopped such a young actor's performance. Our fault is great!

You guys trust people too easily.

This dad is starting to worry.

-Troublesome... you rascal....

'What? Why?'

-...Nothing. Right, I have nothing to say to you.

My Guardian Spirit let out a series of heavy sighs. What was with him? Could ghosts go senile too?

Anyway, the officers happily accepted the invitation. They might not bring many due to their schedules, but they promised to show their gratitude.

On the way back to the theater from the police station.

-I didn't know our Junior had such a commendable heart....

Yumar, the one-armed actor, muttered.

We were dragged out in the middle of acting, so we were still in our theatrical attire. Walking down the street, only wrapped in cloth around our waists and covered in black tattoos, passersby glanced at us curiously.

-Right. It was a bit unexpected.

-Until now, I thought our Junior was a demon that crawled out of Kekerkker's stomach.

-We were just angry about the interruption of the performance.... But after seeing Junior, we felt ashamed.

Tsk tsk.

I clicked my tongue.

"Do you really not understand? Seniors, we've already come away with an enormous payoff."

- Ugor?

"We can earn the money back by putting on a few more performances. We could run another show as soon as tomorrow. What we just created, though, is a [publicity hook]."

The three senior actors tilted their heads in unison.

-What's that, Junior?

Come on. They're so cute.

Reminded that the Earth Spirit Tribe is the cutest in the universe, I calmly explained.

"We have the skills and the works to perform. All our troupe needs now is public attention. And probably by tomorrow, everyone in the city will be talking about what happened today."

「The law enforcement rushed in after receiving a report of a fire.」

「But it turned out to be just a play. The Aura was so lifelike that the audience mistook it for a real fire and reported it.」

"That's what I mean by a publicity hook."

In other words, a topic of conversation.

"Every person in the Earth Spirit Tribe is a potential customer. Everyone, young and old, watches fire dramas. If they hear [The Aura was so realistic that they mistook it for a real fire], wouldn't they be intrigued?"

I added one final hook.

"And if the rumor spreads that our troupe, which suffered damage, invited the law enforcement to the VIP seats?"

-Ugor....

-Indeed.

The actors looked intrigued.

-So, more audience will flock to us?

That's the idea.

"Of course."

But that's not all.

"Besides, I am an Elf. The seniors might not think much of it, but if I continue to succeed like this, surely there will be Earth Spirit Tribe members who'll secretly envy me. Definitely."

Blood plays are an intrinsic part of Earth Spirit Tribe culture.

But imagine a sudden Elf newcomer capturing popularity?

Positive responses would be difficult to come by.

"If they start making up stories and causing trouble, it’s better to have the law enforcement on our side. We are actors selling our performances. Being on good terms with law enforcement can only be beneficial."

-.......

"Who knows? Maybe later, when trouble arises, they might subtly take our side. At the very least, they will now blissfully ignore any ridiculous reports."

-That's impressive....

The seniors admired.

-Sometimes you don’t seem like an Elf, but with such cunning, you're definitely an Elf.

-Junior is a talent with the heart of Earth Spirit Tribe and the mind of an Elf.

-If only you had more muscles, it would have been perfect....

You guys can keep your muscles.

Unless Raviel suddenly develops a taste for beefy men.

'Gong-Ja.' Raviel whispers in my ear. 'Wouldn't it be nice if you put on a little more weight?' Softly. 'Just a bit more.' Whispering. 'I would like to see your arms thicker than they are now.'

Hmm.

I'd pay a fortune if I had to for special training from the most sought-after trainer on the Tower's first floor. What? Built-in muscles? Bullshit. Forget it.

-Junior is grinning foolishly....

-Sometimes he just smiles for no reason.

-I don’t know what he thinks about…. Honestly, it's creepy....

-It's scary... It feels bad....

Quiet.

Do you guys know love?

Even if you know love, you wouldn't know Raviel, so essentially, you don't know love. My children.

-There they are!

Just then.

-Ah!

-The actors are back!

A considerable crowd had gathered in front of the theater. One audience member pointed at us. The Hopgoblins loitering around the gate rushed over.

Thud! Thud!

Dozens of Hopgoblins with hill-sized bodies converged.

-What, what's this?

The seniors got nervous.

-What’s going on...

-When is the next performance!

One Hopgoblin shouted.

-We paid for the tickets! We are the victims unfairly deprived of the show!

-Exactly!

-We have the right to sit in the seats first at the next show!

-Tickets! Give us the tickets!

It was like a swarm of ghouls.

The seniors were dumbfounded.

-Wait, wait a moment...!

Someone squeezed through the crowd. It was the troupe leader. They had deepened wrinkles as if harassed by the audience while waiting for our return.

-Huff. These people, even when I say we'll surely refund them...

-We don't need refunds!

The Hopgoblins shouted.

-Exactly! We’re not asking for refunds!

-Just give us tickets for the next show! There will be a show, right?

-I heard VIP seats cost six times as much as regular seats. Can I upgrade my current seat? Of course I'll pay the difference.
-Just tell me how many VIP seats are left!

The troupe director sweated profusely.

-Ah, the schedule hasn’t been set, I tried to tell them, but they are stubborn. There’s nothing I can do....

I currently hold the real power in the troupe.

The director did their best by not hastily promising another performance and dealing with the audience until now.

"Everyone."

I smiled brightly and bowed.

"Thank you for showing so much love for the Bullshit Troupe's performance. Did you enjoy it?"

-It's not about fun! Ugor!

-That kind of Aura, I’ve never seen before. But it wasn’t just the Aura...

-Anyway, it was amazing! It was intense like fire! There was something!

The audience was excited.

I thanked them again with a bow, but the seniors reacted differently.

More dramatically.

-Our performance...

-.......

Yes.

For one-eyed Arika, one-armed Yumar, and one-eared Sakum, it must be the first time they received such attention.

Like children who saw Santa's gifts for the first time, they didn't know what to do.

"The next play is still being scheduled. Unfortunately, we didn't plan to perform [The Fiery Sword Dance] again."

-That's nonsense!

-It's the tyranny of the law enforcement!

"However, hearing your praises makes me want to repay you, even if there were no plans."

I displayed a business smile (created by Black Dragon Master).

"Next Saturday, we will perform [The Fiery Sword Dance] once more!"

-Ohh!

"And that's not all! The Bullshit Troupe always puts its audience first! We won't open this to the general public. Only those who attended today will receive tickets! A special performance solely for you! A secret performance!"

The audience who missed the climax of the blood play erupted in excitement.

"Thank you for your passionate support! Now, those who want a tattoo, please come in order. We will apply it for you."

The Earth Spirits have an autograph culture too.

Instead of signing paper, actors draw their own signature patterns on bare skin with soft clay.

Hence, fans of popular actors often flock to theaters with the same tattoo.

"But!"

I grinned.

"To receive a tattoo from us, there's one condition."

-What is it?

"Before you get a pattern, shout, 'The Flame Emperor is a son of a bitch.'"

The audience laughed.

They probably thought I was joking.