WeTried Translations
Translator/Editor: Haruto
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◈ The Martial Alliance Rulebook Archives ◈
Chapter 27: Hyperosmia Treatment (2)
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Hearing the Eccentric Physician's words, my first reaction was concern.
If this was a mission specifically meant for me, it had to be different in nature from the Anomaly Records Office's newcomer training I had completed with Peng Juhyeok.
Things had already gone wrong during the newcomer training every Records Officer supposedly went through. Of course I couldn't help worrying about an entirely new assignment.
The Eccentric Physician pulled several books from a shelf in the corner of the records room.
“Hmm, the scheduled dates for the Wudang Sect and Maoshan Sect are coming up soon, are they? The Taishan Sect has one as well...”
I glanced through the booklets. Their contents were rather barren, with nothing but dates and the sects overseeing them listed one after another. Since most of them were Daoist sects, they appeared to be schedules for some kind of spirit-sending rite.
“What are these?”
“Once an Anomaly opens a domain, its influence remains in the present world. These are schedules for ceremonies that periodically erase it. The local residents only know them as days when Daoists perform rites.”
As I had expected, they were a kind of spirit-sending rite, though one performed for Anomalies, which was somewhat unusual.
“In truth, few people even within the sects that oversee these rites know exactly what kind of event they are. Usually, only the elders and sect leaders know. There are a few who work closely with our side, though.”
“So, what exactly am I supposed to do there?”
“The Anomaly Records Office belongs to the Ceremonial Affairs Department, and naturally, there is a rulebook for these Purification Rites as well. You will go as a Purification Rite supervisor from the Martial Alliance's Ceremonial Affairs Department and simply observe whether everyone is doing their work properly.”
A wandering martial artist couldn't survive long by being tactless enough to react with something like, “Wow! That sounds easy!”
I understood the true nature of the assignment.
“Wait, isn't this... an audit? I have to assess whether they prepared this Purification Rite according to the rulebook?”
“Exactly!”
“Won't I get some unpleasant looks if a greenhorn like me shows up to audit them?”
“Precisely!”
“Why is this a mission for me?!”
No matter how I thought about it, wouldn't this be a more suitable assignment for someone like Peng Juhyeok, renowned among the younger generation, or the Eccentric Physician himself, who could suppress people through seniority alone?
I was going to make a truly awful first impression.
Dumbfounded, I raised my voice. The Eccentric Physician calmly said,
“Isn't the purpose of a Purification Rite to cleanse the traces left by Anomalies? In other words, this is also an opportunity to smell the traces of every Anomaly that has appeared so far.”
He added that the traces had already grown faint after repeated Purification Rites, so I would need to control my sense of smell with greater precision to catch their scent.
“You can sense Anomalies, but you have little experience facing them. If you can personally sense the traces of various Anomalies and accurately identify the presence they share, won't that help you avoid going on a gourmet tour and ending up as Anomaly food?”
“That is true, but...”
What went unsaid after my hesitant reply was, “Do I really have to gain that valuable experience by going somewhere everyone will hate me?”
Like a high-ranking Martial Alliance official, the Eccentric Physician seemed to understand the hidden implication at once.
“It'll be fine, it'll be fine. If someone who clearly looks like they have no backing turns up, they'll just say, ‘Hmm, the Ceremonial Affairs Department dumped all its bothersome work on the rookie.’ There's nothing to worry about!”
And like a high-ranking official, he pretended not to hear his subordinate's complaint.
* * *
Surprisingly, the Eccentric Physician had been right this time. Perhaps I could call him a special physician for a while.
The Wudang Sect members saw me struggling for breath just from climbing to Sword-Relinquishing Pond, took pity on me, and served me tea.
If someone with martial prowess around the Peak realm had come to audit the ceremony, their faces would have shown their dissatisfaction as they thought, The Martial Alliance is poking at us again for no reason.
But when they saw a pitiful Second-rate martial artist panting up the mountain, all they could feel was sympathy as they thought, Looks like that fellow got saddled with some bothersome work by his superiors too.
That must have been the special physician's scheme.
Thus, amid the warm, and therefore even more embarrassing, gazes of the Wudang disciples, I entered the Wudang Sect.
The person who had personally come out to welcome an ordinary Martial Alliance member here to observe the Purification Rite was...
“So, you're from the Martial Alliance's Ceremonial Affairs Department?”
Daoist Heosong.
“Yes, that's right.”
He was one of the Wudang Sect's elders. I never expected to be sharing tea with someone like him.
Heosong quietly studied me. His long beard and simple yet dignified Daoist robe gave him the bearing of an immortal, but there was one difference from the image of an immortal people usually imagined.
His hair was black. His profound internal energy must have let him evade the passage of time despite his age.
“Hmm, I heard you were sent by the White-Robed Miracle Physician.”
“Ah, are you familiar with the Ceremonial Affairs Department?”
It was a roundabout way of referring to the Anomaly Records Office.
Heosong nodded. I had heard that the leaders of each sect knew about the Anomaly Records Office, and Heosong appeared to be one of those aware of Anomalies.
“Did you hear what kind of Anomaly made us hold this Purification Rite?”
I carefully shook my head. I had only been told, “You'll know once you get there,” without being told exactly what it was.
“With that one's temperament, I expected as much. What an eccentric acupuncturist.”
Heosong gestured to me.
“May I ask where we're going?”
“Down the mountain.”
Ah.
Damn it, I hadn't even been at the Wudang Sect for a quarter of an hour yet...!
* * *
Going down the mountain felt far harder than climbing it. My legs barely had any strength left, and one wrong step might send me tumbling down a thousand-zhang precipice.
“My apologies. Once the Purification Rite properly begins, I didn't think I could show you what the acupuncturist wanted you to see, so I pushed you a little.”
“Huff, it's... fine.”
Something was strange.
I'm Second-rate, but even so, how could I be this exhausted after climbing a single mountain?
Something had to be wrong. Either Mount Wudang's terrain was wrong, or there was something wrong with my lightness technique...
“We've come down from the mountain now, and only a gentle ridge remains. You can walk normally, so catch your breath as you go.”
I nodded weakly. As I half dragged my strangely drained body along, I caught an odd scent.
“Uh, I smell something like the gamey stench of meat.”
“Hmm. So what the acupuncturist said was true.”
Heosong raised the pine staff in his hand and pointed into the distance. It was a crumbling haunted house, with only a few beams still standing.
Talismans had been pasted all over the soot-stained beams.
Young men in the Wudang Sect's distinctive Daoist robes stood guard around the haunted house. The moment they saw Heosong, they tried to bow.
“You're already working in this remote place, so why bother with formalities? Rest.”
“No, Elder. Isn't our mountain even more remote than this place?”
Both Heosong and the Wudang disciple who said it chuckled. Heosong seemed to have a fairly easygoing reputation within the Wudang Sect.
“Then who is the person behind you?”
“Oh, you haven't heard yet? The Martial Alliance sent this young man because it suspects us of embezzling the Purification Rite budget.”
“Ah, so the Chivalric Path Troublemaker isn't coming this time?”
Chivalric Path Troublemaker?
The first two characters naturally meant a chivalrous warrior who wielded a saber, while the latter two probably meant someone who stirred up trouble wherever they went.
In martial world terms, it would mean something like, That kid's nice enough, but everything they touch...
By coincidence, I knew someone who fit that epithet perfectly.
I wondered what Peng Juhyeok had done to earn an epithet like Troublemaker despite belonging to the Orthodox Path, but soon found it understandable.
Wasn't he someone who admired examples like the Diancang Sect's one-eyed-man factory? It would be stranger if he didn't attract incidents and accidents wherever he went.
The confident voice of the Wudang disciple pulled me from my thoughts.
“Take a look around. The preparations are thorough.”
“Ah, thank you.”
I raised the Purification Rite rulebook issued by the Ceremonial Affairs Department. I should start by checking the number of ritual implements.
At that moment, Heosong raised a hand and sent the Wudang disciples away. I vaguely heard him say that too many people would make it troublesome to count the items.
“Look here instead of at that.”
“Pardon?”
Heosong suddenly approached a beam and tore off one of the talismans attached to it. The gamey scent of meat instantly grew stronger.
Seeing my expression, Heosong nodded. I must have smelled it right away.
After looking around and confirming that the Wudang disciples had gone far enough away, I spoke.
“Um, aren't Anomalies supposed to be kept secret?”
“Who would look at this crumbling house site and think it was an Anomaly? They only know this house burned down because of a love affair. They believe the lingering spirits of two people who committed suicide together wander the nine heavens, and that rites are being performed for them. That's the pretext.”
I turned my gaze to the beam Heosong was watching. The spot the talisman had covered was clearly a different color from the rest of the beam.
It was clean, without a trace of soot. A vivid red, as though it had been lacquered. Seized by a strange certainty, I raised a finger and pressed firmly against its surface.
It gave way.
It felt like touching the flesh of a butchered pig.
“They call it a House Anomaly.”
“A demon that inhabits a house?”
“It means the house itself is the demon. It eats people. Not figuratively, but exactly as the words suggest.”
Author's Note
House Anomaly: Its original source is Strange Tales from a Chinese Studio, which will also be the source of many future episodes.
Footnotes:
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