WeTried Translations

Translator/Editor: Natty

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◈ The Regressor and the Blind Saintess ◈

Chapter 17: Seven Days and Nights of White Night - 3

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A long breath escaped Vera.

His face crumpled.

The words he had managed to say felt so pathetic. After everything, was that all he could say?

He had come so far to finally stand here, yet he was making a fool of himself, unable to say even a single thing properly.

Shame filled Vera, and a flush began to creep across his face.

His eyes naturally searched Rene's expression.

She looked flustered, but there was no hostility toward him on her face.

He should not have felt this way, but Vera found himself faintly relieved that Rene could not see his expression.

He could not let her first impression of him be this ridiculous.

After letting out a short breath, Vera cleared his throat and spoke to Rene again.

"You needn't worry. I'm not a suspicious person. I'm on your side."

He had suddenly worried that she might think him suspicious.

Still, perhaps he had only made himself look even more foolish.

"Um... where are you taking me?"

At her question, Vera finally remembered that he had told her nothing but his name.

It was the kind of idiotic mistake the twins would make.

Of course she did not know him. Of course she did not know where he belonged. What had he been doing without telling her any of that?

Ashamed again, Vera hurriedly continued.

"The Holy Kingdom...! I came from the Holy Kingdom."

"...Pardon?"

"I came here to protect the Saintess..."

Vera was stumbling through his explanation when he stopped at the sight of Rene flinching.

A faint shadow fell across her face. Her expression was gradually darkening.

Why was she reacting like that?

As Vera tried to understand,

"...I'm not that person."

Rene's answer immediately gave him the reason.

Watching her speak with that dark expression, Vera belatedly remembered her state of mind at this point.

...Resentment.

Resentment toward the Lord. Resentment toward the Lord who had taken away her light and tossed her a single Holy Mark in return. This was likely the time when it dwelled in her heart.

She had told him so herself. There was no room for doubt.

Realizing his mistake, Vera hurriedly lowered his head.

Squeeze.

His fist clenched.

'You damned idiot!'

What am I doing? Did I make this happen because I can't even speak properly?

Panic filled him. He had to make up for it somehow.

Vera tried to continue.

"Wait..."

"Please go back. I'm not the Saintess."

Instead, words that pierced his heart came back to him.

"...I think you've found the wrong person. I'm just a blind person from a little country village."

The words left him unable to breathe.

"I'm sorry I'm not the person you're looking for. I hope you find the Saintess. Goodbye."

Tap. Tap. Tap.

Rene, the Saintess, quickly made her way into the red-roofed house, tapping her cane against the ground.

The door shut. A wave of white vanished from his sight. The woman he thought he had finally reached was growing distant again.

The dark brown door...

Thud.

With not the slightest mercy, it hid her from Vera.

* * *

Tap. Tap. Tap.

Her cane struck the ground.

In time with it,

Step. Step. Step.

Footsteps followed.

Rene let out a deep sigh at the footsteps trailing behind her.

"Why do you keep following me?"

"I apologize."

At the low voice, Rene frowned slightly and added,

"I'm not the person you're looking for, Sir Paladin."

"I apologize."

For two days now, the paladin who said he had come from the Holy Kingdom had followed her whenever she went outside.

Even when she told him she was not the Saintess, even when she asked him to leave, the paladin only muttered, "I apologize," like a parrot and followed her.

As a result, Rene had not gone a moment without sighing these past two days.

"...Shouldn't you be looking for the Saintess? You don't have time to be doing this."

"...I apologize."

That damned apology.

Rene felt frustration welling up inside her, but she could not bring herself to snap at him and only kept sighing.

...The voice she heard was too deeply subdued for her to speak harshly to him. For some reason, it weakened her resolve.

Besides, he truly did nothing but follow her, so she had nothing to criticize.

He stayed far enough away that even if she swept her cane around to feel out her surroundings, it would not touch him.

With every step, he planted his feet firmly on the ground, making sure she could hear him.

He never spoke before she did.

So what could she say to drive him away?

Of course, she could think of plenty of cruel things to say.

That his following her frightened her. That it made her skin crawl. That she was so afraid of him that she trembled in bed at night.

Rene knew she could say such things.

But she was not cruel enough to say them to another person.

Especially not someone who treated her kindly.

If she had felt that he meant her harm, she might have been able to say as much as she wished. But the paladin always addressed her with the utmost respect.

He treated her as if she were the Holy Emperor.

How could she say something cruel to him?

"...How long are you planning to follow me?"

"I apologize."

The same answer again. Rene no longer had the energy to say anything else, so she faced forward again and moved her cane.

Tap. Tap. Tap.

Step. Step. Step.

The two sounds continued in a steady rhythm. Each time Rene tapped her cane against the ground, Vera's footsteps followed.

It was nearly time for the sun to set, but under the White Night that illuminated the world, the sky was still blue.

Vera watched Rene's back from exactly four steps away and matched each step she took.

His eyes never left Rene and her surroundings.

What if something flew at her? What if there was a large rock in front of her?

He looked around, worrying over such absurd things.

...He could not speak.

There was much he wanted to say.

You must go to the Holy Kingdom.

You cannot stay here.

Those seeking you will come here. They will turn not only you, but this entire territory into a sea of blood.

Such realistic words came to mind, but he could not bring himself to say them.

They would force her hand. It would be as though he were disregarding her wishes.

So Vera simply followed behind her.

While training in the Holy Kingdom, he would sometimes find himself wondering.

If I were to stay by your side, what would I be like?

Would I stand proudly beside you? Would I stand before you and hold back your enemies?

But perhaps those thoughts had only been another form of arrogance.

Now that the day had finally come, he could not stand by her side. He could only follow carefully behind her.

It was a truly regrettable, even pitiful situation, but Vera did not find it entirely hopeless.

At least he was walking behind her. No one could be satisfied with the first bite.

...Vera knew it too. She had not accepted him.

Fourteen-year-old Rene, who resented the Lord, simply did not have the malice to lash out at him.

She simply could not bring herself to hate him enough to cast him away.

It was so like her, that kindness of hers. And he was clinging to that kindness as he followed behind her.

As sticky self-loathing rose within Vera once more,

"...Sir Paladin."

Rene spoke.

"Yes."

"Why did you become a paladin?"

Vera stared blankly at the back of Rene's head.

He had realized that she was asking him a question, and that was why.

"...Why do you believe in the gods? I don't understand it. There are many people who believe in them, but barely any who have experienced their miracles. So why is everyone so obsessed with the gods?"

Vera tensed his thoughts, thinking that this time, he had to answer properly.

He considered what answer he should give.

What answer would be for her?

I believe in the glory of the gods. I believe in their omnipotence. I believe in the Authority they bestowed upon this world.

The words came to him, but Vera could not choose an answer that felt right.

They were all pretty words. Nonsense he did not even believe himself.

Dissatisfied with every answer that came to mind, Vera thought of the person who could give the wisest answer to this question.

How would the Holy Emperor answer? What would that old man say?

Then,

...It would be meaningless.

That was the answer he reached.

Was it not? Imitating the Holy Emperor's answer would be meaningless. It would be deceiving her.

In Vera's opinion, those words were not meant for fourteen-year-old Rene.

Vera thought again.

What words could he offer fourteen-year-old Rene, who resented the gods?

After considering it for a moment, Vera answered in his own words,

"...I don't believe."

"Pardon?"

"I don't believe in the gods. I don't believe in their glory, their omniscience, or any of it."

Stop.

Rene halted. Vera stopped as well.

Rene turned her head back.

She was looking into empty space, but Vera knew that was how she tried to look at him.

"Aren't you a paladin? Is it all right for you to say that?"

"It is the truth, so I have no other answer to give."

A small laugh escaped Rene.

"...That's interesting. Then why did you become a paladin if you don't believe in the gods?"

At her next question, Vera forcibly swallowed the words, Because of you, before they could escape. Then he took a breath.

Why had he become a paladin? Why had he become an Apostle?

What answer was there that was not about her?

After thinking for a moment, Vera found the answer more easily than he had expected.

"I wanted to learn how to protect."

"...How to protect?"

"Yes. There is a light I dare to follow, and I became a paladin because I wished to learn how to protect that light."

At its core, those words were still directed at Rene. But as far as Vera knew, it was the answer that kept her furthest from the reason he had become an Apostle.

Rene pursed her lips as though thinking over his answer, then asked,

"Then did you learn?"

Vera's lips closed.

Do you know how to protect?

If she asked that, there was only one answer Vera could give.

"...I still don't know."

"I see."

A faint, listless laugh escaped Rene.

Her spirits seemed to sink a little.

For some reason, the sight tightened Vera's chest, and he moved his lips again.

"However, I learned how to find that answer after becoming a paladin."

At the edge of his vision, Rene's face held an unreadable expression.

Vera continued his thoughts as he watched her.

He still did not know how to protect. He still did not know the Protecting Sword.

He was not wise enough to understand it. In just over four years, all he had realized was his own arrogance and ignorance. If he tried to understand it alone, he might never find the answer for the rest of his life.

But fortunately, the wisest person in the world stood before him.

"Now that I have learned how to learn, I will seek to understand that Protecting Sword."

If he followed her, there was someone who would one day show him the answer.

Vera lowered his head.

It was an endlessly respectful gesture, though one that would not reach her.

Rene spoke as Vera bowed deeply.

"...That's wonderful. I'll be rooting for you."

With those words, Rene turned forward again and began walking.

Tap. Tap.

Her cane struck the ground.

Vera belatedly raised his head to watch her back and answered quietly.

"You honor me."

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