WeTried Translations
Translator/Editor: Haruto
Discord: https://dsc.gg/wetried
◈ Even in a Dark Fantasy, You Still Have to Eat ◈
Chapter 38: Army of the Dead # 3
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The evil necromancer Akam controlled corpses like dolls.
People called it the Dark Emperor.
It was the emperor ruling over the world of the dead in the Land of Night.
Still, even that emperor of plague had a weakness.
It was difficult to control countless corpses all alone.
‘Well, I have trouble controlling even one shadow.’
That was why Akam created its Lords.
They were like middle managers for the corpses.
“So if we find and kill that Lord, things will get better?”
Clap!
I clapped my spit-covered palms together and flicked the spit away.
The trail of spit pointed south, and Weasel swore.
“Damn it! Are you fooling around right now? Our lives are at stake!”
“Do you have another idea?”
“Even so, that direction is packed with half-dead corpses!”
We needed some clever way to find the Akam Lord in these vast sewers.
The Ranger among us with the best tracking ability was...
“My nose feels like it’s going crooked! There are too many Akam, and my senses are getting dull!”
See what I mean?
So we had to try something.
The barrier the Priests had created together would not last forever, either.
Grrrroooaaar.
Kyaaaagh!
Crackle.
Crack-crackle.
“Damn it! They keep sending in the small fry!”
“We can’t hold out!”
With corpses and skeletons swarming us, the Priests’ barrier seemed to grow dimmer by the second.
If we stayed here, we would just die like dogs!
“I will follow the platoon leader.”
Sir Mancha readjusted his grip on his massive lance and joined my party.
Batuli soon raised her hand too.
“You won’t be able to defeat an Akam Lord without a Priest’s support! I’m coming too!”
“Ooh!”
It was my first time taking a Priest into a boss fight, so even in this situation, I felt good.
Was that all?
Weasel patted my shoulder.
“Brother, let’s make sure we both survive and meet again!”
So the people hunting the Akam Lord were just Sir Mancha, Priest Batuli, and me.
Since there were few of us, I thought we would move more easily.
Then someone raised a hand.
“I... I’ll go too...”
“Huh? You, Mouse?”
I never expected cowardly Mouse, who had done nothing but let out little shrieks since coming into this drainage tunnel, to volunteer for the special unit.
Sir Mancha quickly warned him.
“Mouse, you could die.”
“I know. I just keep getting these annoying orders.”
“Orders? Who?”
Who dared order Mouse around when I was the platoon leader?
As I looked around, Mouse answered.
“Jweperi.”
“Jweperi? Your idol?”
Mouse nodded.
“It keeps squeaking that I have to follow you, Yore. It’s so loud! It doesn’t even give me any amazing blessings... yet it has so much to say... It’s so... so annoying...!”
It was not even a proper trading partner, yet it kept butting in?
Just like my Nihil-Raz!
Batuli, the model student, tilted her head in confusion.
“It’s strange for an idol to speak to you so often. Does it talk to you a lot even outside the Land of Night?”
“T-that’s why it’s such a headache. I thought it had gotten quieter after I came to the officer academy, but now it suddenly won’t stop talking...”
Anyway, Mouse joined our assault team.
All that remained was to break through.
“Let’s go! Succeed and we get rich! Fail and we become corpses!”
“Prepare to charge!”
Sir Mancha aimed his lance forward and began running with all his strength.
“For His Majesty the Emperor!”
Crunch!
Crack!
That alone opened a path like a tunnel-boring machine.
“Aaargh! My hand got bitten!”
Mouse screamed.
Batuli swiftly held out her hand, and the wound slowly healed.
“Try not to get hurt before we encounter the Akam Lord!”
A party with a Priest was incredible!
The back of my neck tingled.
‘Something is happening!’
‘Maybe I really can graduate in the top five!’
# # #
How much time had passed?
“Platoon Leader! The number of Akam is increasing! If we want to turn back, this is our last chance!”
Sir Mancha, who had been charging everywhere, panted heavily.
Had we worked this old man’s joints too hard?
At that moment, I remembered the Thieves’ Lock Rule.
There is always treasure behind a locked door or lock.
On the other hand, perhaps there was something worth protecting behind all these Akam.
‘The Lord...!’
Once that thought occurred to me, I felt even more confident.
“Sir Mancha! Keep going! Keep going!”
Clink!
Clink!
Ether dropped every time we killed an Akam.
More than the moving corpses, it was this Ether that troubled me.
Fuck, I had to pick all of that up.
「Skull of the Dead: Bones infused with the resentment of the dead. Creepy. Gather bones to make accessories or decorate your home.」
Even round skulls rolled all over the place.
How could I not pick them up?
There was only one answer!
“《Shadow Companion》!”
I activated my skill.
Rise, my clone!
Pick up the Ether and skulls!
“Shadow magic? Platoon Leader, you had quite a sinister technique tucked away!”
“Don’t talk to me! My brain feels like it’s splitting in two, left and right!”
“Y-your brain is already divided into a left and right side!”
This little rat!
He did nothing but chatter away. I wanted to hit him.
“Instead of standing around, pick up Ether!”
“I’m... I’m not standing around. There might be a t-temporary resting place nearby...”
Mouse took out a sheet of paper.
I wondered what he was doing, but he folded the paper into the shape of a frog.
“Go.”
Croak.
The paper frog croaked!?
What kind of trick was that?
That little rat was a mage, so maybe it was magic!
Hop, hop.
The frog skillfully hopped through the underground sewer.
Then it stopped in front of a wall, and Mouse tapped the stone wall with his staff.
Knock, knock.
“There’s a space... behind this. Everyone, come here!”
What was he trying to do?
I felt uneasy for no reason, but Mouse took out something like a brush and painted something on the wall.
It was a square shape with a doorknob. It looked exactly like a door.
“This is my blessing, Mouse Hole.”
Whoosh!
“Aaargh! Mouse got eaten by the wall!”
I shouted in surprise.
Sir Mancha pushed my shoulder.
“Let us go in too!”
Whoosh!
I was pulled into the wall as well.
Batuli soon followed us inside.
A fairly spacious room appeared before us.
There was an old bed and a brazier where we could build a bonfire.
It did not smell rotten.
The silence, without even the corpses’ screams, was almost comforting.
“It seems to be a rest area for workers who used to work in this citadel. I once served in a citadel myself, so I know.”
Sir Mancha looked around and gave his assessment.
Meanwhile, I was amazed by Mouse’s ability.
“You can make a door in a wall and pass through it? That’s amazing!”
It was an ability with endless uses!
If I had something like that, my criminal record would have been half as long!
But Mouse clicked his tongue while lighting a bonfire.
“It’s... it’s useless in combat.”
“Mouse, can you ask if I can trade with Jweperi too? Please?”
I shook Mouse by the shoulders.
Mouse shook his head fiercely.
“Y-Yore, it says you smell like a snake. So it can’t trade with you.”
What!?
A snake meant Sabranik!
Since I had traded with a snake idol, a mouse idol, a snake’s staple food, could not approach me.
It was fucking unfair.
‘This is the first time I’ve regretted trading with Sabranik!’
Anyway.
We all lit a bonfire and took a short rest.
“This is traditional jerky from my hometown. It’s called Bartz.”
Batuli took out dried meat. It was salty and delicious.
It was so good that I kept eating it, and Batuli held out more of her share.
“I eat it often, so I don’t really want any.”
Batuli probably wanted to replenish her energy too.
Was she lying on purpose so she could give it to me?
‘Priests are pushovers.’
She had a dark complexion and small eyes, giving her a rustic look, but seeing how kind she was, she might make a good girlfriend.
‘I should add Batuli to my list of potential girlfriends.’
Once my stomach was reasonably full, I felt more relaxed.
If I was going to make time to trade with an idol, now was the only chance.
“I’ll step away for a moment.”
I headed into a dark corner.
Then I called Sabranik.
“Sabranik, are you there?”
【You did not give me the idol.】
【How very insolent.】
Was Sabranik angry at me now?
Sabranik had made a huge fuss about wanting the Eight-Armed Great Mother Idol.
But I had something to say too.
“Sabranik, you ran away and left me behind when that weird spider appeared!”
【What are you talking about?】
【Ah... the spiritual attunement is... crackle...】
The conversation cut off.
‘As expected of a snake idol. Cunning and good at lying.’
They said the Blessed traded with idols that resembled them.
Sabranik was probably as good at lying as I was.
But Sabranik was probably just as greedy too.
“Sabranik’s nickname is the Skull-Eating Evil Dragon, right? There are lots of skulls here.”
I looked at the skulls I had obtained while taking down the Akam.
There were easily more than a hundred.
【Crackle.】
【Ah, the spiritual attunement is good again.】
【My Blessed one.】
“Lord Sabranik, what can you give me for these skulls? You know my situation, right? If you have a good blessing, give me that!”
If Sabranik did not give me something good, I would die!
“How about Serpent’s Legs, the one you mentioned before?”
【Serpent’s Legs is precious.】
【Instead, I will make Snake’s Blood one stage stronger than it is now.】
“Blood? Poison will not work on corpses anyway!”
【I am, by nature, the Skull-Eating Evil Dragon.】
【The dead cannot raise their heads before me.】
【With your blood, grant them complete rest.】
Did that mean the poison would become strong enough to work even on corpses?
“Alright. Let’s trade.”
Ssssss.
The surroundings soon darkened.
I stood on a riverbank where deep darkness had fallen.
From far away, a snake made of bones crawled toward me.
【My Blessed one.】
【Know that my heart is true.】
【I have never run away.】
Sabranik prattled excuses and opened its mouth wide.
I shoved skulls into that mouth.
Like shoveling coal into a train engine!
Soon, Sabranik smiled in satisfaction.
【Contract complete.】
Drip.
A single tear shed by Sabranik dampened my head.
When I returned after finishing the trade, Batuli spoke to me.
“Yore, I have good news and bad news. Which do you want to hear first?”
“It’s better to get the bad news over with first. Bad news!”
“Mouse says the Lord’s room is near this rest area.”
“Oh! Isn’t that good news?”
“The problem is, Mouse says the Lord seems to be an Erdari.”
What!?
Sabranik damn it!
A hybrid of an Akam and an Erdari!
Should something that horrible be allowed to exist in this world!?
My anger doubled, swallowing up my reason.
“Then what’s the good news?”
Whoosh.
The bonfire’s flames flickered violently.
Footnotes:
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