WeTried Translations
Translator/Editor: Haruto
Discord: https://dsc.gg/wetried
◈ Even in a Dark Fantasy, You Still Have to Eat ◈
Chapter 9: The Mole on the Shoulder # 4
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“Why would a magic university have a thief-class skill book?”
Hermit handed me the red book she had been holding.
“Only someone suited to a skill book can read it. You should be able to see what it says.”
Ugh, I hate books.
Still, she gave it to me, so I took it.
The squiggly letters, as hard to read as worms, straightened out and changed into words I could understand.
「Shadow Stomp」
That was the book’s title.
Flip.
When I opened it, the pages were packed with writing.
「A footwork technique said to have been devised by the Emperor of the Sewers.」
「Greatly reduces the sound of footsteps for a short time.」
「Would you like to use it?」
“It’s a skill that reduces the sound of your footsteps.”
“...”
“...”
“...”
The other three exchanged glances.
But I had something else on my mind.
“How much do you think this is worth?”
“A red cover starts at ten million Ether.”
It was a superpower any burglar who dreamed of robbing houses would want at least once, so the price was understandable.
Still, having dealt with Asibarr before, it seemed wildly overpriced to me.
The Black Foot Asibarr sold cost 100,000 Ether and had a better effect.
It didn’t greatly reduce the sound of footsteps. It erased them completely.
So using this myself would be stupid.
I hated math, but I could do calculations this simple.
“Let’s sell it.”
I didn’t need long to think about it.
Hammer immediately rushed over.
“...Are you serious, Yore? A thief skill came out, and you want to sell it?”
What was with that reaction?
“Would it be better if I just used it?”
“No, if you can sell it, selling it is better. I’m just surprised. See? Didn’t I tell you Yore was nothing like other thieves?”
“That really is unexpected. Other thieves would’ve swallowed it without a second thought.”
Hermit added her own comment.
Apparently, they had assumed I would definitely use the skill book.
“What are other thieves usually like?”
“No matter how much quota they have left, if they find thief-class items or a thief-class skill book, they swallow it all. They’re too busy stuffing things into their own mouths.”
I thought of One-Eye, whom we had met earlier.
If One-Eye had seen this book, it would’ve been digested on the spot.
“You really want to sell it?”
Hermit lightly pushed up her pointed hat with her index finger and looked at me.
I hadn’t noticed before, but Hermit’s eyes shimmered like auroras.
“You really do? If we sell it, it’ll be divided evenly among all four of us.”
If it sold for ten million Ether, that meant 2.5 million Ether each.
“Then we’re done with today’s quota?”
A daily wage of one million won.
I had wondered whether I could even earn that much.
Instead, I had made 2.5 million won.
I felt amazing!
“But how do we sell it?”
“Put it up at the auction house. They’ll take a small fee, but it’ll sell quickly.”
“Yore, I don’t know much about life on the streets, but a skill that reduces footsteps sounds useful in all sorts of situations. Are you willing to sacrifice that for the party? You...”
Hammer grabbed my shoulders and shook me hard.
“You understand loyalty!”
Drip, drip, drip.
Water ran from beneath Hammer’s helmet. Was Hammer crying?
I was more surprised that someone could produce that many tears.
Still, being praised made me a little embarrassed.
“Hehe. I’m pretty good when I put my mind to it.”
“Then I’ll hold onto the book. I’ll put it in my hat.”
Hermit took off her pointed hat and placed the book inside.
Whoosh.
Then something amazing happened.
The thick, hard book vanished completely into Hermit’s hat.
That was real magic.
It was my first time seeing actual magic, so my mouth fell open on its own.
“How much can you put in there?”
“About as much as one large chest.”
Mages really were incredible.
Even in this world, the -sa professions were thriving.
“Since we’ve filled the quota, should we head back now?”
Hammer looked around.
“We made a lot of noise with those Hendrix guys earlier, so the Church might come patrol this area. The map says there’s an exit nearby, so getting out should be quick.”
So there were separate exits.
I was also curious about this Church they kept mentioning.
I’d only kept quiet because I was worried asking too many questions would make me seem clueless and ignorant.
Perhaps Felix read my mind, because he explained first.
“The Star Church is the group that has occupied Michanic University. To survive in the Land of Night, they gave up their humanity. You’ll recognize them at once. They’re filthy heretics.”
“Are they religious people?”
“They worship the doctrine of the traveling stars. They believe a new age will come when the celestial bodies spread across the sky line up as one. Led by the Pope...”
“That’s enough! Felix, if you make it that long, Yore won’t remember any of it!”
Hammer cut off Felix’s growing explanation.
Nice, Hammer.
I had started getting sleepy as soon as Felix began talking about traveling stars or whatever.
Hammer gave a short, clear explanation instead.
“There are four traitors in the Land of Night who dare call themselves emperor. This is one of their territories. He’s a fucking awful bastard.”
Now that was easy to understand.
There was a reason Hammer was the party leader.
Felix’s face turned red, and he cleared his throat.
“Rather than leaving immediately, why don’t we spend the remaining time hunting Octopuses and gathering more Ether? We could get new equipment and enhance what we have.”
Hunt more monsters?
Even I thought that was a great idea.
This guy knew what he was talking about!
Hammer clicked their tongue.
“Seriously, Felix. For a young master, you sure love money. What do you all think? Hermit, you go first.”
“I’d like to keep exploring too. We came all the way to Michanic University. I’d hate to leave without finding a book related to magic or even one magic tool.”
That was Hermit’s opinion.
Then everyone looked at me.
“Let’s wipe out those octopus bastards today!”
# # #
「+300 Ether」
「+300 Ether」
「+300 Ether」
「+300 Ether」
In the broad open area on the university building’s third floor, we slaughtered the Octopus monsters pouring out at us!
Coins dropped everywhere!
Tentacles wriggled in every direction!
“Hehe. Hehehe.”
As I picked up as many as I could and stuffed them into my bag, Hermit, who was brushing fluid off herself, asked me a question.
“...Why are you picking up the tentacles?”
“Don’t you think we could grill them?”
“Ugh.”
“So, Hermit, how much did we make?”
“I think we’ll have to calculate it when we get back. But we probably made at least another two million Ether.”
Two million!
Hammer, who had been tending to their armor, joined in.
“Wow, if it went like this every time, we wouldn’t even need to rob treasure chests!”
The sun outside the university windows glowed red with the colors of sunset.
Watching it, Hammer clicked their tongue.
“Already? Night is coming earlier than I expected.”
“What’s bad about night coming?”
“Everything gets worse. More monsters appear. Even breathing becomes harder. If we stay exposed to the night for too long, we’ll turn into monstrosities too. Blessed can endure it a little better.”
That was why only Blessed could enter the land of the old Empire.
Ordinary people couldn’t last here even during the day. They would turn into monsters.
“Then we change plans. We’re going back. We filled the quota ages ago anyway.”
Hammer picked up several heavy sacks of Ether at once.
Felix took a few bags, and I carried several too.
My body was heavy, but my heart and steps felt as light as feathers.
When we got back, I’d drink a cold cola.
With that thought in mind, we wandered around looking for the exit.
Then a problem came up.
“Nara, Und. Beldar?”
“Aroho. Matsu, Nardra.”
“Bilgolsal.”
We ran into people speaking some strange language.
No, they weren’t human.
They wore robes like mages, but tentacles stretched out from beneath them instead of arms and legs.
Their heads were covered by flat stone masks.
They clearly weren’t normal.
“Damn it, Church bastards. They’re already patrolling before nightfall?”
Hammer hid around a corner and watched them.
“They’re like bees. If one warns the others of danger, a whole swarm will come running. If possible, let’s leave quietly without clashing with them.”
It sounded like a good idea.
But things didn’t always go as planned.
“Aaaah! Aah!”
Someone was running toward us from the other corner, screaming loudly.
Since I was more used to the dark than the others, I saw his face first.
“Isn’t that One-Eye?”
“Ahhh!”
“Narhagra!”
“Ditdimon!”
“War. Gaballeu!”
One-Eye was making such a huge commotion that the cultists who had abandoned their humanity were chasing after him.
The problem was that One-Eye was coming our way.
“Hey, hey, hey! He’s coming this way!”
Hammer panicked.
Cool-headed Felix drew his sword.
“Damn it. We should’ve killed him earlier.”
Felix stepped forward and cut off One-Eye’s head.
Chop.
One-Eye went quiet in an instant.
One-Eye’s remaining eye stared at me.
“I told you. Felix is a thief hater.”
“Felix, Hermit, Yore! Get ready to fighttttt!”
A battle broke out in an instant.
The cultists’ combat strength was no different from the Octopuses’, but there were exceptions.
“Narglabl!”
“Hey! That one is using magic! Hermit!”
“Mana Force Field!”
An octopus monster that could use magic.
Was this really reality?
“Damn it, Hammer! We can’t hold out like this! We need to find another exit! The slime is making my sword duller and duller!”
“I need to catch my breath and restore my Mana through meditation too!”
“Goddamn it, there are still as many of these bastards as ever! Follow me!”
“Eek!”
Hermit screamed.
When I turned my head, One-Eye’s body, which Felix had decapitated, was moving and grabbing Hermit.
How could someone without a head move?
The answer was in One-Eye’s head rolling across the floor.
“Ahh, I can see the stars. The distant Mothers of the Stars will descend upon this land! Walu-walu, waalu! When the spinning stars stop, the age of the stars will finally come!”
Tentacles wriggled out from between One-Eye’s broken jaw and eye.
I thought I’d seen every strange thing there was to see in my life, but even this made my legs shake.
“...Ah, what the hell is this!”
One-Eye, now an octopus monster, leaped at Hermit.
I happened to be beside her, so I grabbed her and pulled her away.
We somehow avoided the attack.
But another problem arose.
“M-My hat!”
Hermit’s pointed hat fell to the ground.
The head-only One-Eye snatched it up and vanished into the darkness.
“Goddamn it! That bastard is causing trouble even after he’s dead!”
Hammer clicked their tongue.
“My hat! My hat!”
Hermit seemed completely crushed and kept repeating the same words.
Felix slapped her across the cheek.
Smack.
“Stop it. If you keep making noise, more will come. Do you want to die here?”
“...”
Felix was terrifying, but he was right.
Still, I understood how Hermit felt.
The hat held all the Ether we had gathered and the skill book!
“...Forget the hat. That way leads to the underground prison. There are traps everywhere, and the Church bastards will be crawling all over it. You’d be better off shoving a honey-covered head into an angry hornet nest.”
“I’ll...”
My mouth opened.
Maybe I couldn’t stand leaving behind the Ether and skill book in the hat.
“I’ll go take a look. From what I saw, those religious freaks only react to loud sounds. If I walk really quietly, I might be able to manage somehow.”
Footnotes:
“-sa professions” refers to prestigious occupations whose Korean titles end in 사, including mage.
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