WETRIED TRANSLATIONS

Is It Bad That the Main Character’s a Roleplayer?

[Translator – Aren]

◈ Chapter 336 If Only I Could (22)

Daniel cleaned up after the drinking party with Meister. It more or less was just putting back the chairs they had brought in from the next room, clearing away the food, and putting everything back onto the trolley.

"They said to leave it here, right?”

"Yes."

If they left it like this, the servants would simply handle the rest. At least, that was what the Lord had said while bringing out the expensive liquor.

"...We should probably leave a note.”

"Why?"

"He’s obviously going to suffer tomorrow.”

There was a good chance that the Adventurer would be miserable with a hangover, so it would be better to at least leave a note asking them to prepare food with that in mind. Hangover food wasn’t a cure-all, but it would still be better than nothing at least.

"Hmm......?"

As he did that, Daniel found three drawings. He had come across them while looking for a scrap of paper or cloth to write on. One was filled with images that seemed to symbolize death, another was a portrait of a middle-aged couple bearing traces of having gotten wet and dried again, and the last had been blacked out beyond recognition.

"What is it?”

"It’s nothing."

This seemed like something Meister shouldn’t see. Before his gaze could land on them, Daniel turned the drawings over. There was plenty of other paper around he could use for the note anyway.

"Let’s go."

There was no reason to spend a lot of time writing just a short note. He quickly wrote a few sentences and placed it on the trolley.

"Ah, how long is it going to take to get back to the lodgings? Maybe I should’ve agreed when they offered me a room here.”

"That’s a bit……”

"Why? Isn’t that better than making all that noise by leaving the castle in the middle of the night?”

Was…is? Daniel wasn’t sure. He might be an inquisitor, but unless one held a rank around that of a commander, there usually was no reason to enter and leave a castle where the lord resided.

"...We already decided we were going back and received the permission with that in mind. Let’s not start acting outside the plan.”

The servants here had already been given instructions that the guests might leave in the middle of the night. Changing everything now would only annoy the Young Lord. Daniel mentioned that, and Meister accepted it without complaint.

Sure enough, perhaps because they had been informed in advance, the guards didn’t stop them as they headed for the exit.

"It’s really strange.”

"What do you mean?"

"Whenever it’s somehow related to that guy, we’re granted permission awfully easily. To the point that the lord just approves people with no real authority like us coming and going from the castle at night.”

"...Hasn’t he accomplished enough to warrant that?”

"Still, this just feels a bit excessive……”

Meister frowned as he voiced his discomfort but didn’t finish the thought. Like someone who had an inkling about what was going on but was holding his tongue because he had no way to prove it.

"Might end up staying in this city for a while.”

"......?"

Daniel didn’t quite understand that last remark. Staying in the city for a while? Who did he mean?

The Adventurer?

"Who are you talking about?”

Daniel asked, but Meister didn’t answer. “I’m leaving.” He simply headed down the fork toward his lodging.

Daniel decided not to stop him to press him for an answer.

"...Why are you sitting there?”

But when he spotted someone crouched outside the encampment where the Temple people assigned as outside support were staying, there was no way he could just walk past without saying anything. The person, curled up into a ball, perked up his ears.

"...Old man."

I told you not to call me that. Daniel frowned, then saw the expression illuminated by the lamp and merely sighed. Even though the Adventurer’s treatment had been settled far more favorably than he expected, the sight of him only growing more and more emaciated was too pitiful.

Especially now that Daniel had learned even just a fragment of what the Adventurer was thinking……

"...Forget it. Just don’t stay out here too long. You’ll catch a cold."

Judging by his expression, he didn’t even seem to be present enough to answer, so what would be the point of insisting on a reply?

Daniel rubbed his warm neck and cheeks, still feeling the effects of the few drinks he’d had, and tried to walk past him.

"Hey, old man.”

This time, the other man stopped Daniel.

"What?”

"......"

"If you’re going to stop someone, then say something."

But words still didn’t leave his mouth. Even with Daniel’s almost stubborn patience, this silence just kept on stretching longer and longer.

"...Hah."

In the end, Daniel was the first of the two to speak up. He had drunk far less than he was able to, but perhaps even that little alcohol had made him act more on impulse.

"You know that’s a bad habit of yours, right?”

His voice, mixed with some irritation, exasperation, but also concern, shot out like an arrow. It was something he had always wanted to say to him.

"...What?"

"I’m talking about how I’ve told you not to call me old man, and yet you just keep doing it again and again.”

"I mean……”

"Of course, I know saying this won’t make you care more about what I have to say. I’m sure you’ll just think ‘That old man’s being an old man again.’ But I still have to say it.”

Daniel crossed his arms and looked down at the man sitting there curled up like a little kid. ‘Kids with big bodies.’ He didn’t want to admit it, but the Adventurer’s description had been accurate.

He wasn’t sure about the Hero, but this immature brat, at least, was unquestionably just a kid.

"Trapping people inside the impression you’ve forced on them and treating them that way to the bitter end isn’t a good habit. You’re young now, so people might still let it slide. But if you get older and keep doing it, no one will do that anymore.”

If ignorance was the privilege of the young, then growing up was their duty.

"You’re a clever person, so even if you don’t understand this right now, I’m sure you will someday. But I'm warning you. If you don’t realize it soon enough, you’re going to lose a lot, or, well, only a little, but something incredibly precious. I mean it.”

And if one failed to fulfill that duty, only two futures awaited them. Either they would be abandoned as someone stuck in eternal ignorance or pay a very heavy price for failing to understand things sooner.

"....What do you know?!”

"Yeah, I know nothing. How could I when I’ve never even properly seen what kind of relationship you and that man have?”

He was pitiable and, at the same time, so incredibly frustrating. Daniel let out another deep sigh as the other man sprang to his feet in anger.

"But I do know that man’s patience is almost at its limit.”

What had the Adventurer meant when he said, 'There were times he wished they’d just stop?’

"......! Wh-what did you just say……?”

"...Why does that surprise you? Did you think he would accept you forever? Did you think that because he was someone who would never break, he would stay right where he was forever?”

Wasn’t this basically just blind faith?

Fanaticism that reacted with shock before sympathy to the fact that he had shed tears. Blind faith that imagined he would never break, no matter what. A lack of understanding born from admiration blinding them to what lay underneath.

"...I don’t think the trust you place in him is wrong. But if you ask whether that trust is right, I can’t agree to that either. Especially when I consider the name you give your relationship.”

Of course, absolute trust was something incredibly precious. But if that trust blinded both sides and caused them to miss each other completely, wouldn’t it be better to change rather than stubbornly cling to it?

"Remember this. The relationship between parent and child, guardian and ward, is usually not an equal one. It’s one that demands one-sided devotion and patience from one side. Only relationships where both people continue interacting on equal footing can be called lovers, friends, or companions.”

Daniel hoped this immature brat would understand what he truly meant. This was the best advice he could give.

* * *

"...I’m dying.”

I had a hangover. Headache, heartburn, nausea. The whole dizzying combo hit me the moment I woke up.

"Uugh…”

This was exactly why I tried not to drink. This was the moment I vividly remembered what had made me quit drinking. I never expected I’d end up repeating that scenario, but I guess you really never know what life will throw at you.

"System."

Still, yesterday I really had no choice but to drink. Rather than dwell on things pointless to regret, I called up the sleep system to escape this miserable feeling.

Well, whether this world was real or not, I might as well use whatever was available to me. And right now, with my head hurting so badly, I couldn’t possibly fall asleep on my own, the sleep system was the perfect choice.

[Sorry, but the kid in charge of the system is asleep, so you can’t use it.]

"...He was the one in charge of that?”

[Technically, he and I handle it together by cooperating and splitting the work…but anyway, the sleep system doesn’t work without the kid.]

So did that mean I had to stay awake and suffer from this massive hangover? Pain reduction couldn’t do anything about this either, so I had to just endure it……

"You really can’t do it on your own?”

[The sleep system works by interfering with the link between the body and the soul and temporarily putting you into shock, but under the contract, whenever I touch your soul, the kid’s permission is absolutely needed. You permission isn’t enough.]

"Haah......."

Putting everything else aside, he really had tried to make sure that my safety was ensured. Even if that was making things a bit more bothersome for me right now.

Feeling the extent of Faust’s efforts, I sprawled out on the bed. I felt like I was dying.

[...If it’s really that bad, why don’t you come inside?]

"You’re talking like going to the mindscape will somehow make a difference."

[A hangover is ultimately just one of the effects of alcohol entering the body. In the mindscape, where you’re partially cut off from your bodily sensations, you won’t feel it unless you want to.]

...Seriously?

Feeling doubtful, I entered the mindscape. The headache made it a little hard to concentrate, but fortunately, I managed.

My body, which had felt as heavy as water-soaked cotton, became light, and the nausea paired with dizziness vanished. All that remained was something akin to phantom pain. Something that would fade with time as well.

"It really worked.”

[I don’t lie.]

What kind of bullshit was that? Before I realized it, I found myself looking at Wrath with great contempt, then turned my gaze away again. I wanted to go check on Faust.

"Ah, right, he was asleep.”

But just as Wrath had said, Faust was still asleep.

I crossed my arms as I watched the boy sleep peacefully inside the cabin. My reason, which had been restored the moment the hangover vanished, was becoming stained once more with all sorts of things.

"......."

But was it unpleasant? I wasn’t sure. Maybe drunkenly venting all of that stuff counted as getting some of those emotions off my chest. Or maybe finally hearing the boy’s circumstances properly yesterday had stirred up my sympathy more than I thought.

More than feeling awful, I just felt sorry for him. Maybe because the dam of my emotions had been broken again and again, and then sleep had diluted the remaining water.

After the flood and storm passed, all that was left was a small patch of acceptably damp earth. The kind of soil where just about any seed could easily take root.

"Haah."

Well, if I wasn’t careful, too much moisture might make the roots rot instead. But that wasn’t something I could control.

[Why the sigh, Gretchen?]

"Why do you think?”

[Just throw away your sympathy. It’d make things easier.]

Instead, I turned toward Wrath, who absolutely refused to come within a certain distance of me. That tone of hers, refusing to admit that she herself was the cause of all this. As always, her personality just seemed to astonish me.

"I just remembered something."

At the same time, several things I’d somehow forgotten rushed back to me. Things important and necessary enough that I couldn’t believe I was only just remembering them now.

"I guess I really haven’t had any breathing room.”

[......?]

"Isolating the abuser from the victim should’ve been my number one priority, but it somehow completely slipped my mind.”

[W-wait.]

Having control here was actually pretty nice. I pictured a wall to contain Wrath. Apparently some other stray thoughts got mixed in that image, because the prison I created came out a bit small, but it still worked well enough.

[My dear Gretchen, at least let me straighten my back! This is just way too cramped!]

"Sure. Hang in there."

[Gretchen……!!]

I was just kidding anyway. After temporarily locking her up, I built a proper prison beside it.

It had a window that couldn’t be opened, a door that could only be opened from the outside, and nothing inside but a simple folding bed and a table.

[...I shouldn’t have taught you how to use this place.]

"You think things would’ve been fine if you hadn’t?”

I lifted the box-shaped prison containing Wrath and shoved the whole thing inside the proper cell. Click.

The moment the door locked, Wrath broke out of the box…or rather, I let her break out of it and stared at me through the window.

[Doing this won’t cut off communication between the kid and me.]

"I know."

As if this wall could possibly be the answer to everything. But I wanted to believe it was better than nothing at least.

I lowered the blinds I’d hung outside the window. The moment I couldn’t look inside anymore, I felt a little more at ease. [You’ll regret this.] As for the voice I could still hear… Well, our conversations weren’t actually conducted through sound, so I had no choice but to put up with it.

"That takes care of the urgent matters……”

I looked out over a world containing nothing but the cabin I had built and the prison

Until now, it had never particularly bothered me. But now that I was stuck spending some time in the mindscape, at least until I sobered up, I realized just how empty and eerie this place was.

It felt even more so because outside the mindscape, meaning reality, was filled with all kinds of colors.

"Can’t I at least add some color?”

After thinking about it for a moment, I pictured a nice field and forest. Empty streets would only make this place feel even more desolate, so wouldn’t a natural scene be better?

"Oh, it works, it works.”

Fortunately, the world had only been white because no one had ever thought to give it color. Looking out over the lush green plain, I found myself getting weirdly excited.

I mean, who wouldn’t get excited when the world changed just by imagining it? This was incredibly fun, as if I had become a god.

"Let’s plant some flowers too……”

Since I couldn’t be called a botanist in any way, I couldn’t possibly reproduce thousands of different plant species. But when I recreated the bushes I used to use for my webtoon work as faithfully as I could, quite a variety of flowers and plants shot out of the ground. That alone made the scenery more convincing.

"It’d be weird if there was only grass, so let’s add some water as well……”

Looking over the beautiful flower field, I imagined a river flowing through it, along with smaller streams branching off from it.

Trickle, trickle, trickle. They were shallow enough that if the boy ever felt like exploring this place, he could just take off his shoes, dip in his feet, and play.

Snip, snap.

I plucked a few flowers with my hand. No, I think I plucked quite a lot actually.

Before I knew it, I was carrying an armful of flowers as I headed toward the cabin. The cabin, which I hadn’t gotten around to color properly, was one of only two stains on the plain, along with the prison.

So I breathed life into that place as well. A cabin might bring back bad memories, so I went with the most unrealistic, cozy design I could think of.

The cabin, which had looked more like a brick house, transformed into a gigantic apple tree.

Creaaaak

I carefully opened the creaking door and looked inside. Even as vines growing in from outside spread across the walls, the boy showed no sign of waking up.

I made a large round cross-shaped window beside the bed where Faust lay and set down the flower I had picked. If the boy woke up like this, he would instantly see them.

"...I’m sorry."

Of course, none of this would heal all of the boy’s wounds.

"I wish I’d been a better adult.”

Still, I hoped doing my best wouldn’t be completely meaningless. I sincerely hoped so. With that thought, I gently patted the boy and eventually fell asleep beside him.

「...You’re already a good adult.」

Just before sleep overwhelmed my waking mind, I felt as if I heard a faint voice.

.

.

.

Knock, knock.

"......!"

I didn’t sleep for long. At the sound of someone knocking on the door, I instinctively woke up. It also felt as though someone had shoved me back into reality.

"Who is it?”

I reflexively shaped Ratel into a sword and widened my pupils. The person outside the door identified himself: “It’s me.” It was the Young Lord.

"Ah…Just a moment.”

I set Ratel down and rubbed my face dry. Click. I only opened the door after making myself look decently presentable. There wasn’t much I could do about my greasy, unwashed hair, though.

"So why did you come?”

"Ah, it’s nothing much……”

Did he come to ask whether I was staying or leaving? But I still hadn’t decided on that yet……

-Taptaptaptatpatpatap!

"......?"

While I was awkwardly thinking about how I should answer if he brought it up, I heard the sound of footsteps approaching as if sent to save me. They rang clearly through the corridor, loud enough that even the Young Lord, who was close to an ordinary person, could hear them.

"Just a moment……”

But if someone was running like that even inside a castle where etiquette was strict, chances were the matter was incredibly urgent.

The Young Lord asked me to excuse him for a moment, and I readily agreed to wait.

"You’d better stop right there.”

"What?”

Bang!

Of course, the Young Lord never got the chance to step away and deal with the matter. It wasn't anything complicated. The person that came toward us simply opened the door and entered before the Young Lord could leave.

"Y-Young Lord.”

And through the open doorway appeared a messenger with a face as white as a sheet. Something serious happened. Both the Young Lord and I immediately sensed it.

“The Grand Temple has fallen, and we’ve lost contact with three cities.”

I hadn’t expected it to be that serious, though.

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